Would you mind helping me please?

[Mumtothenipper]

Dear mumsnet,

I am in need of your help! I am a nearly 33 year old mum to a nearly 2 year old. I feel totally lost about style. For as long as I can remember I have been living in jeans/black trousers with a vest/long sleeved jersey top combination. All my tops seem to be a plain one colour or horizontal striped. I am 5'4'', size 12/14 bottom and a 36G up top (mumsnet measuring).

My husband asked what I would like for Christmas and I said new clothes.... The problem is I have no idea what to look for. The last new clothes I bought myself were maternity or nursing. Before I had my daughter I either bought my clothes in Dorothy Perkins, tesco or asda. I like the idea of clothes from fat face, white stuff etc. I have a sailing/sporty back ground so that fits with my idea of how I think I want to look. I think I've always been a bit scared of pattern!

I used to teach in a school so practical smart was the order of the day. Now I teach from home and with a toddler in tow. I guess I want to look nice and like I've made some effort but without worrying that an expensive item will be ruined by the play do/paint etc that I spend my day surrounded by.

Does anyone have any advice for me on the type of clothes I should be looking at or ideas for shopping.... Online would be easiest probably!

Thanks so much!

M2TN

I'd recommend going to Debenams for a personal shopper, outline what you've just told us and see what they offer you. There's no obligation to buy but it might give you some inspiration?

I don't know if others will agree with me but if I'm trying out a new look I usually buy it from somewhere like Primark so if I decide it's not really 'me' at least I haven't broken the bank!

I'm the same size, size 10, also have a nearly 2 yr old (and a 4yr old) ... what sort of jeans/black trousers do you wear? i have a uniform of skinnies, ankle boots & (cheap) blouse/breton top for everyday. When you have a two yr old in tow, you can't really dress up much TBH. I do "do" my hair, wear some nice stud earrings and plenty of makeup which makes me feel good.

Maybe you could get some new skinnies (Topshop Baxters?) and go and try on loads of tops from say Warehouse & Oasis to see what suits? They are relatively cheap and easy to wear. Or you could ask for a pleather skirt of nice dress to wear on date nights?

sorry should have said same "height"

I am 10 top 12 bottom and 34dd and so maybe slightly similar proportions? I like skinny jeans and light jumper/shirt boots or skater dress with tights as they flare out over hips which is my biggest part.

I'm soon to be 32 also so it's really depends on what shops as I don't want to look like mutton! I like Dorothy's/new look/ sainsburys sometimes/primark/next.All cheap and have smart casual clothes.

Have just purchased a brown faux leather jacket with faux fur collar to fling over all of the above suggestions which I live right now.

These ideas maybe so is horrendous to other but just thought you aren't too dissimilar size wise/age so flinging ideas out there!

Maybe sound *

I'd be wary about doing too much too soon. I found the toddler years a bit of a fashion wasteland before I found myself and my style again.

If I were you I'd ask for some money to buy a premium pair of jeans: you're always going to wear them and the right pair can make you feel great. Personally I've found premium denim better: better finish, more flattering, better fit, so I'd splash out on one pair. Go to a high end dept store like self ridges or Harvey nics and try on pair after pair sfter pair (ask for an assistants help) until you find the right ones. If the price makes you faint, note the name, come home and Google like crazy to get them cheaper (outnet, yoox, shop bop wherever).

Start reading fashion blogs and consider which ones you're most drawn to, or look on Pinterest. Try out a few of their looks and see if they work for you.

Good luck!

slouchy-ish knits also good. I bought a navy one with star print similar to (but slouchier) this

Thanks all, your encouragement is just what I needed. I bought some nice skinny jeans in m&s the other week which I really like. I think I will just be brave and try on done different tops. I've always stuck to v necks in the past, any necklines me and my massive friends should avoid or should I just go for it?
I don't know what I'm so afraid of!

I have large boobs and avoid high necks or polo necks
Scoop, v neck, some slashed necks work on me, anything that sort of shows a tiny bit of skin
I live in dresses with waist belts and footless tights or skinnies with layered tops

If you have the time, might be worth going to somewhere close by, anywhere will do (asda, sainsburys etc, just one shop)
Grab some things you like but aren't sure about and try on just to get an idea of styles/cut/colour then you can online shop away