Do you buy your partner's clothes?

[Cuteypatootey]

Would love to buy a few things for my partner but not sure how he'll respond. Does anyone buy their partner's clothes and have any pearls of wisdom about how to go about it? It's not that he has bad taste, it's good but he just doesn't get round to it.

Umm no lotte. Its a partnership, he does some stuff and I do others. And I am way more stylish than him

Lotta - no. He does loads of things I hate - cleaning the loo, putting out the bins, vacuuming etc. I work full time and he doesn't. I like shopping; he doesn't. Why does it need to be an issue?

I don't. I have given up after too many returns! He is v stylish and buys his own stuff, casual stuff mostly from Zara and shirts from TK Maxx. He is v fussy but seems to have an eye for fashion that I envy, he doesn't shop often but the things he buys invariably suit him and work for his life.

I do think this is a feminist issue though - not specifically for me, but I think it is. Whether you're buying your H clothes because you're fulfilling the 'nurturing woman' role, or caring more about appearances, or because he doesn't take responsibility for dressing himself... I don't see keeping oneself dressed as a household chore to be divvied up. I see ironing the same way in my house, it's a personal task for DH to do his shirts, but that's because they are the only thing that needs ironing - I avoid buying clothes for myself and the kids that need ironing. I like trying to choosing clothes for DH buti do feel very wifely when I do. If it's just a chore, it's anti-feminist, and if it's because you care about his appearance, it's anti-feminist. But at the end of the day, a lot of stuff around clothes is anti feminist and I still love fashion

this thread is going to take a swift turn.. excellent
saying buying your partners clothes is the equivalent of being mothered is ridiculous. We probably wash our partners clothes and cook the odd meal too. Isnt that what partnership is about?

I'm sure him cleaning my pubes out of the plughole could be considered a personal task but he still does it so I'm happy to buy him a pair of pants.

In our house, DH and I are equally interested in each other's clothes, and the DCs. I show him what I am going to buy. Sometimes I listen to his opinion, but not always. Sometimes he listens to my opinion on what he plans to keep (that I have bought, using his views and taste as a guide). If he doesn't like something I have bought for the DCs, I will often return it. Thus, we are both interested and involved in the household clothing. It's just that I do most of the physical shopping.

I buy dh clothes because I am sahm and we both consider clothes to be a practical thing (do not enjoy choosing them and don't have anything unnecessary). I am in the shops so it's just like me picking up some supermarket shopping. Or like any other chore I might do like vacuuming. It's different if you love clothes and want to experience shopping for them, make a trip etc. Nothing to do with me mothering him, just a straightforward division of labour.

I buy DHs clothes except for his suits. He's like most blokes and wears pretty much everything. I enjoy shopping- he doesn't so it works just fine

Never he is super fussy about the fit, colour etc. All his clothes are expensive and well made but he wears them till they are kaput. His jumpers are always cashmere (with holes in the elbows), his suits and coats Aquascutum (with ripped linings), his shirts Jermyn Street (with frayed collars and cuffs), his shoes Churches (so worn out we went on holiday to a third world country and he took them to a cobbler there who said he'd never seen such worn down shoes and refused to repair them), casual clothes John Smedley, Paul Smith, Puma trainers, Jigsaw men, Havanias but equally worn. I sometimes buy socks and boxer shorts after my SIL saw his boxers in the wash and described them as suspenders there were so many frayed bits hanging down. I've no idea what he does to his clothes but they don't last long.

He also always comments on the fit of other men's suits, shirts etc - weather reporters seem to bother him most.

If I need to buy a clothes he is the best person to take but hates shopping.

I would love to buy my partner some new clothes but he would tell me off Some of his clothes are, let's just say, a bit wacky. However, buying clothes apart from at Christmas and birthdays is "wasteful" apparently.

I met dh when he was 34 so no buying his clothes doesn't make me feel indispensable -he left home at 18 so managed a fair while without me! Dh makes my pack lunch (along with the 4 other pack lunches)...by that time in the evening I can't be arsed and he doesn't mind-does that mean he's acting like my Dad? What about when he irons my clothes, puts my plate in the dishwasher, cooks my tea or gives me lifts when I want to go out and have a drink?

I thought marriage/family life was a partnership and you divided up the tasks according to time and preference?
I didn't realise I had to behave entirely independently...just because dh and I depend on each other for stuff doesn't mean we couldn't do it. I've just been recovering from an operation and dh has done absolutely everything for nearly 6 weeks for all 5 of us as well as going to work and yes he bought himself some shoes in that time (chucked them in the trolley at Asda just like I would-the wonder of it!

Tbh neither of us go to the shops much (not a hobby in our house), but I work half the hours he does and he's a size medium and always fits a 32 short leg and a size 10 shoe. -I would never buy him something he wouldn't like because it was my taste-that would be weird-I know he likes plain shirts, no logos on tshirts, boxers not pants-so that's what I get him if we've decided he needs it.

He couldn't buy for me because I find it very hard for me being tall and having 2 sizes difference between my top and bottom generally means shopping is a trial and I have to try everything on. I don't go shopping with anyone else-I prefer to do shopping as quick as possible and do fun stuff with dh/friends/family.

Occasionally I'll buy him a present. Obviously I don't buy his usual clothes, what with him being a fully functioning 48 year old. I don't always madly like his dress sense but he's not always wild about mine either.

Nope.

Unless I'm abroad and find a nice t-shirt or something that is different to the ones back home (nothing that says Kiss Me Quick or Shagaluf, etc),. But that is a gift. Otherwise, no, he's an adult. I wouldn't ask him or expect him to buy me knickers or socks or work blouses if he's going shopping.

I am flabbergasted at the response to this thread. I thought it would be 90% of posts saying "WFT? Of course not."

I've bought DP some clothes as presents, but he has never worn them. Especially the Daddy Pig t-shirt.

WTF, obviously.

I really don't see the issue.. see some plain tees in his size, bung them in trolley.. see some duds in his size in special offer, bung in trolley and so on. God forbid you just do something for the man in your life.. It's not a big deal

Not really

If I'm out and about and I see something I think he'll like I'll buy it, or if he mentions he needs socks and I'm in the supermarket I'll bung them in the trolley, but he buys the bulk of his clothes

He does the same for me.

What's the point of us both having to go out, when I can just say, "oh, grab us some knickers while you're in Sainsbury's"? Or vice versa.

I don't actually know his size, come to think of it.

Yes, my dh doesn't have time and has simple requests ie polo shirts, jeans and work shirts and pants etc

I guess his clothes have always been entirely his business. He buys them, washes them and irons them. He works in central London near shops that he likes, whereas my sole shopping opportunity is Sainsbury's or shitty local chains like Burtons.

Buying him clothes seems faintly, I don't know, infantalising. But it would seem that, oddly, I'm in a minority.

I guess I don't see buying clothes as part of the household chores, like cleaning the bathroom or changing the sheets or whatever. I see it more like personal maintenance, like getting hair cuts and shaving seeing the dentist and that sort of thing - stuff that you just have to arrange for yourself, whether you like it or not. I'm no great fan of shopping believe me, but I cannot imagine, as an adult, asking someone else to choose my clothes for me. I agree its infantilising.

Hell, no.

I will, on occasion, say something like "They have some of those socks you like in Cording's". Or "Hilditch and Key have a sale on." But buy his clothes? No way! I feed him, isn't that enough?

The DDs did buy him a very nice shirt from John Lewis for Fathers' Day. They called him to ask what size they should get, Large or XL? He said Large, I am not XL any more. So they got him the Large. It is too small.

If I could get my husband to go to the dentist for me, I would in a heartbeat!

I think all this shows is the different ways people view things. It's clear many people see it as babying someone, or whathaveyou. I and it seems some others see keeping clothes on your back as just necessary to stop you getting arrested but not something that can only be done by the person themselves (as opposed to going to the dentist on account of the fact that nobody can take my teeth in for me well not for a few years yet ) so if you don't like doing it and you can trade it in for a boring yet necessary task that you hate less - why the hell not?