A proper Baden Baden type spa?

[TheBeautifulVisit]

Does anyone know of a proper Baden Baden type Spa in the UK, preferably not too far from Herts? I don't know if anyone is old enough to remember the spa in Covent Garden, the Sanctuary, that had a swing over the pool? Well I want a spa that is the opposite of that. I want to be greeted by stern women with strong forearms and I want the place to smell vaguely of disinfectant. And I want to be pummelled.

I'm going to treat myself to 3 or 4 days away very soon. I'm stressed and exhausted.

Oh yes please to smelling of disinfectant. Or maybe Germolene.

no idea where such a place might be. Hmph

Forgettable. Yes, Germolene is precisely it. I might have to start my own spa. I don't want a beautifully made-up 20 year-old fussing over me and tickling me with lavender then ringing a bell (while hoping her next client has prettier feet). I want Traute.

I've been to somewhere like that, but sorry OP, you'll need to go to the Gellert in Budapest to sample it!

It comes complete with old ladies wandering around in plastic shower caps and little else!

Grayshott in Surrey?

Book a sports massage. They're much firmer.

Don't Ryanair fly to Baden Baden? You could go for the real thing.