Please help me... I'm getting married in a months time and I don't like my dress

[TheMoistWorldOfSeptimusQuench]

It's this one

Kind of nice - well, I thought so at the time - but I put it on yesterday and just felt deflated and dowdy. I look like someone's mum (well, I am someone's mum, but you know what I mean).

I also have this jacket and these shoes, both of which I love and definitely want to wear.

I'm thinking sell the dress on Ebay, and find something else? Or am I being a bit daft? DP thinks I look lovely in it, so maybe I should just go with the flow...?

I look good in green, generally I think. Can I get married in green?

Help!

Your first dress is really, really lovely, but I agree that the jacket doesn't go, it isn't glamourous enough. I can see it looking good with jeans though.

I would go for a sort of up do, something with a bit of texture and volume a messy up do, but carefully messy. If you don't have much hair/volume then your stylist can use a donut thingy to wrap your hair around.

Second and fourth pictures on this site are very nice

www.tumblr.com/tagged/messy%20updo

First dress is stunning not mumsy at all (the second one is tho IMO).
I would wear the dress without the jacket and possibly swap the shoes there are some more dressy mid heels in dune that look a bit more special I'll have a hunt now

www.dune.co.uk/mobile/mid-heel-dept3103/ the discover or dally d :)

I also like the dress but think the jacket is making the outfit look too officey.

I would look for a jacket specifically made to go over a wedding dress to make the dress look more bridal. ie this sort of thing

waswondering thanks, I love the green one - might have to go and try that on.

nilbyname yes, they look just the thing. Thank you.

TomArchersSausage Love your name My choice of jacket was intended to stop the outfit from being too weddingy, so that's not really what I'm looking for, but thank you. Same goes for the shoes. In the Jacket of Doom's defence, I had initially dismissed it when I saw it on the website, and it was only when I saw it in the flesh and tried it on that I fell for it.

However I know from bitter experience that one ignores the collective wisdom of Mumsnet at one's peril, and consensus being as rare as hen's teeth around here, I've decided to save the J of D for trip trapping around Gay Paree with my jeans. I really, really like Tether's bolero, and I think will order it. Will also go up to Oxford Street again and try some of the lovely dresses linked here. However, DP loves the Phase Eight one, my Mum loves it, DD loves it, everyone bloody loves it...

I haven't liked everything, but I am so grateful to every one of you who has has bothered to post and look around for things for me. It's been so helpful, and I feel a lot better about the whole thing now.

Another person saying keep the original dress. It's really nice but could look even lovelier with a contrasting belt - maybe while you're on Oxford St, go to John Lewis's haberdashery for some velvet ribbon?

I hope the wedding is wonderful and enjoy Paris.

I think the dress is fine if the colour suits you. Though I think its a great idea to take it to a good local dressmaker for tweaking if you are unhappy on any aspects of fit or trim.

But I think it plus the jacket together could be a bit too pastel/wishy washy and this may be what is making it feel mumsy to you.

Would try for a different jacket or wear dress without it.
Shoes are not exciting but OK with the dress I think.

PS think belt could work too.

The jacket is amazing with jeans and tops. My bestie has it and she looks lush in it. And she is definitely blessed of boobage. Definitely keep it. It will always be special because it was a wedding contender

I love the idea of a fluffy bolero / cape thing around your shoulders. It is your wedding day - you want to look amazing, different and your best self. You will be warm, but not in a jacket. You'll be able to show off your amazing curves and still look girly.

So excited for you

Aw shucks, you're all so lovely with the good wishes

Love the little shrug cardie thing that lightrain linked to.

And definitely a yes to swanning around Paris looking fabulous in your jacket with jeans.

I'm sorry but I refuse to allow to get married in a cardigan. I don't care how many sparkly threads it has in it - it's a cardigan. That's just wrong.

One of those glamorous, feathery, downy wrap-around off the shoulder cape type things would be cute though. I wore one of those to an evening wedding recently and I felt like Marilyn Monroe. It was lovely.

I love the dress and shoes but not the jacket I think the dress is quite sexy and fun but the jacket a bot mumsy.What about a wrap as suggested before?

some lovely things here

I love the fluffy shrug someone linked yesterday - gorgeous, fun and glam.

I love the first dress. It is more sophisticated than the green one. Could you put up a photo of you actually wearing it? Then people can give you a realistic opinion.

I loved that too MadAbout.

Good idea Hint. You wouldn't need to show your face SeptimusQuench.

Loving your first dress so classic which is important for the photos.

Manicure hair and makeup can make such a difference on the day.

Ditch the jacket

Beautiful sparkly clutch and how about some stunning shoes ...my friend married in a plain Coast dress that cost £50 in the sale but blew her budget on some designer shoes. Bonus being she can still fit into the shoes!!

Yes to sparkly clutch and I'd be tempted to splash out on some more special shoes too, as suggested .

Sorry, wasn't here yesterday, but thanks again for even more nice ideas.

Agree that a cardigan is wrong, but I can't do the fluffy / furry things either as I'd be even more top heavy. There are some more nice lace shrug and bolero type things on the site noddy linked to though.

As for shoes, I really love the ones I have . I think possibly part of the problem here is I'm dressing for my wedding, but conversely, I don't want to look too "bridal" iyswim?

But a big yes to sparkly clutch - I have a lovely old one. And I went to Mac yesterday for a make up lesson! It was fab, and the lovely make up artist just happens to have a boyfriend who lives in Paris, so she gave me loads of 'off the beaten track' restaurant / bar / gallery recommendations. Bonus!

I have the Drum Major shoes from Clarks and agree - they are soooooooo comfortable so if you want to wear them on your wedding day, DO!

Would you consider a tea-length wedding dress like this one:
www.amandawyatt.com/classical-elegance/levi
or may be would you think of wearing a second hand wedding dress
www.bride2bride.co.uk/search.php?category=87&filter_1=1344

Just putting a few suggestions out there.

Brilliant news about the tips for Paris!