WHy do magazines and websites think we stand by desert roads in hot pants?

[FluffyMummy123]

and other such oddplaces
Or that we joyfully ride bikes around with baskets full of tulips ( houles kew etc)
or wear bikini bottoms with wellies and look ecstatic?

or slouch moodily in window frames?

i want a REAL LIFE womans cataloge

Gloves - modelled by a mum on all fours( not THAT type!) next to a rugby pitch unravelling boys boot laces

PANTS modelled by a demented hair woman realising the alarm hasnt gone off and SHE CANT FIND PANTS

that kinda thing

Are you the real, original cod.....or someone else using the name?

Btw, i agree with your post.

kids coats modellined by kid trying to escape out of the door

oh i often loll on a slip road to the A41 in a wispy silky number

Or not.

Women in sundresses are always sipping drinking under a parasol in a sun-dappled Italian piazza, never speckled with goosebumps on an overcast British beach cursing whoever blithely told her "the forecast is for sun all day!"

How about school uniform modelled by a group of 12-year-olds playing 'take-down' in the mud and not standing neatly in front of a whiteboard?

KEw always has demented looking women looking , frankly, sectionable in macs with belts on top and wellies holding a watering can

if she came to your door youd call the police

i mean this means NOTHING TO ME demendted tractor shaggers

If I was to lurk round laybys wearing bikini bottoms with wellies I'd be arrested. But if I was a size 8 that might be a different matter ...

Pics of women sprinting up a school drive with frizzy hair and no make-up, or of kids scowling with their tops on back to front. Much more realistic.

do you fish by the house of commons?

'are you the real cod?'

PAH HAAA HA HA H AAAAAAA

hotpants! we are so not the demographic. though if i were to wear hotpants i would hope to be in a deserted place

joules catalogs are demented, part of their charm.

She really doesn't want to get that fish anywhere near her jacket, does she?

what is the thinking behind this?

sorry can't do links but page 11 with the freaking rabbit, who does that appeal to?

Is it supposed to be aspirational?

I do not aspire to leaning against tractors in the mud - why d'you think I left the West Country?

No such thing as 'the real Cod' - it's a computer program just like GabbyLoggon.

You see this is why I can't take up meditation or yoga, I do not have a room in my house containing only a big jar of twisted willow, some pebbles and an organza curtain.

And I look horrible in white leggings with my hair in a bun.

EarlyBird - you've not spent enough time on MN if you can't decide whether this is The Original or not!

I must admit - I have a bit of a hankering for the sort of life that calls for wellies and a big cardigan worn with a silk dress - all a bit Helena Bonham Carter madcatwomanesque.

But as far as I recall, I have never made any fashion decisions that involved large fish or hotpants.

Doing links is not hard.

Look up where it says "http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/style_and_beauty/1143890-WHy-do-magazines-and..."

that's the address bar

Go to the site you want to link, click in the address bar, it'll all go blue.

Press the ctrl button and the c button at the same time. That copies the address onto your imaginary clipboard.

Now come back to your writing-a-message box. Click inside and press the ctrl button and the v button at the same time. The address will appear.

Put two of this [ before the address and two of this ] after the address. There will be a link.

And I can't eat healthily because I can't bring myself to make eyes at people over the top of a massive slice of watermelon

yes trillian but teh page i want to link to is fancy schmancy flash or some such adn does not have an address.

belligerentghoul - you're right, i haven't been here as much recently, so am definitely 'out of the loop'. This 'cod' seems to have the same sense of humour, but types far too well!

I hate fancy schmancy flash websites - don't they know we want to link them and take the piss?!

Also, magazines seem to think that we find eating salad hilarious

I like to wear a ballgown with short wellies and big birdsnest hair with smudged make up from the rain Looks great!