Whatever you want, whatever you like, be WISE and AVID, so do your sums, and get it right....!

[DolceeBanana]

New thread...sorry bit lame compared to normal, but thought I'd bite the bullet (as it were)....

bet it Chesneys Tracey

Bloss....wowee! Gorgeous photo and love jacket!

Loobylu- can I be added too purleese? Thanks

Cake right weight with maintenance (unless skewed idea of 'right' is 7st or something.

Boys play def low maintenance here. Mine sit painting for hours singing Black-Eyed Peas. No intervention required.

Tracey DS2 told me 'I haven't got any friends mummy'. I don't really know what the real story is there. He's never had a best friend but is sociable. He makes things up all the time though, I'm rarely sure what's true in what he tells me.

DS1 also said that he wished he had lots of friends like at his last school. He's nearly 9 and it seems to be more complicated for him now, though he does have some good friends. He used to be very popular with the girls but this year a very opiniated girl has led a little campaign against him saying that he's 'contamineux' so apparently none of the girls like him. I confess I did take this up with the girl in question's mother when I ran into her at a cocktail party. I was polite but asked her to ask her daughter to tell her about it as it was a problem for me. I don't think she did tbh.

Anyway I would have said something to the other mother, I definitely would have.

Fritzi how horrible. Make sure you get to the bottom of it all before the end of the day. Nothing worse than a festering row.

... Blimmin iPhone.

Sorry, Fritzi, was about to say that I hope your DH appreciates that. I'm not very good at stepping away from arguments but I hope you've found a good distraction today and that he seriously makes it up to you tonight.

LTEC I've been thinking of Dukaning to shift the last 10 pounds or so I'd like to lose and your question is very pertinent. I'm surrounded (in DH and socially) by relaxed, eat-what-you-want-and-don't-put-any-weight-on, boys and would find it very difficult to maintain any high maintenance diet in that environment. I'd stick out like a sore thumb - I don't want to be the fussy egg white omelette one.

But but but... That's how I ended up way over my ideal weight in the past because I ate and drank alongside them, being one of the boys.

I've only dropped to my current weight because of being on maternity leave and breastfeeding - and this thread has made me much more image aware.

Now that I'm no longer BFing I need to do something different so am shredding 4x per week and lots of walking. But I look at myself and want more from my body. DH thinks I'm getting a bit obsessed and thinks I won't ever be satisfied. I'd like to be 8 st to see what I look like and then decide if it's worth the upkeep.

I tend to work on BMI/body fat as opposed to weight. For me, if my BMI is 21 or under then I feel 'slim'.Body fat around 22/23%. At my slimmest as an adult my BMI was around 19.5 or something like that, but I was not doing that through healthy means (i.e cutting out loads and loads of food groups.) My friends took me out and gave me a talking to! These figures allow me to stay around a size 10 (ish). And yes, there is a part of me that would like to be lighter/slimmer....but I have found to my cost in the past that even when I am slimmer, I am still the same shape.....just with a slightly smaller silohette!

Personally, I think unless someone needs to loose weight for health issues, then any diet that involves people needing to constantly restrict what they eat, and regard a whole gamut of food as 'forbidden' is so joyless. Obviously it's not healthy to be constantly fisting handfuls of crisps/sweets into your mouth, but as long as most food choices are healthy, then occasionally eating food for PLEASURE - because food is/should be pleasureable - is a good thing.

ooooh what to do ... this is very cute, quite Marant-y, but possibly indecently short for day (unless worn over leggings which is a big no no in my book) and skirt is quite flimsy .. what to do what to do??

Over chunky dark grey tights?

Or perhaps skinnies?

nnnnnnyyyyyyyeaaaah, no yeah dunno. I'm kind of, it's it not over bare legs, what's the point?

hells don't be so sure that we will never agree

Buy and wait for summer! (Although, as this is the UK...the summer sometimes forgets to turn up!)

yessss.. think I am just slightly shell shocked by the sight of my bare legs ... will try it on again at end of Op Beauty when legs have been holiday-skinned (not to mention de-fuzzed!!) and don't look so scary

Looks like summer to me! With cute plimsolly type shoes?

Lol LTEC you've gathered enough intel here to write a book about MNetters dieting habits. Just shows that the issue is floating fairly close to the top of the W&A collective conscious!

Definitely an ok weight that is easy to maintain. But that is easy for me to say because I can stay at a reasonable size (not slim but not overweight) even when eating like a pig.

I'm not particularly happy with my figure (but I don't think I would be even if I lost a stone) and am hoping to shape up a bit with exercise but I like food too much to go down the high maintenance route. Life's too short IMO.

Hmm -I like it cake but don't think it would be ideally suited to an action packed day with the DCs!

yes oooh it's interesting isn't it. I am always keen to hear the opinions of others on matters of that nature, esp after reading 2 articles recently - one in Red about how women lie about making an effort to lose/ maintain weight and one in Sunday Times Style yest about aspiring to a semi-anorexic state - "managed anorexia" I think they called it. About eating disorders seeming appealing almost. Interesting. I make no bones about the fact that I have issues surrounding food and body image that I am utterly bored by but can live with quite happily reasonably comfortably without it impacting on family or social life too much - my anguish very much goes on in my head, my dh often comments in how well I hide my anxieties in public - JOKE!! - but am always interested to see that the subject of food/ dieting tend to bring out an element of defensiveness in people (me included)

Having said all that, am not researching an article, honest!

god apart from applying some dinosaur tattoos and making lunch I have had to do absolutely nothing this afternoon!!!

I have never been on a diet but I am pretty healthy, I think, and enjoy food and wine. I am normally around 10 stone (63kg?) and a UK10/12 but I am 5'9" so I think that's fine. DH helped me up from the sofa yesterday and told me I was starting to get heavy. How very dare he!

Re weight I am vague and have no idea of numbers / weight.

If I feel good/light, small clothes in right size fit, get nice comments from everyone (including dh). Then that's fine. Plus given a choice between a potato and some protein, it's a very easy choice for me, so still enjoy food.

Fritzi you are a star! Yes please . And I am giving your dh a stern internet look to treat you very well to make up for his comments.

carciofi - You are my height/weight twin (Well, nearly...sounds like I am 1/2 cm taller and a kilo heavier!) Wish I could also claim to have never been on a diet as well. Alas, a screwed up attitide to food that I think partially came from my parents (Dad gains weight easily/eats all the 'wrong' things at great speed/Mum hugely conscious of her weight when I was growing up, despite being a healthy weight...looking at bootom in mirror/tutting/eating different food to rest of family etc) meant that I gained weight as a teenager and then spent years trying to be 'perfect' until I kind of grew out of it. But it took me 15 years!!

Well had a word with teacher who was perplexed as confirmed DS is popular/has lots of friends etc. So am just going to put it down to experience.

Well apart from asked DS who he'd like over for dinner/play after school next and of course he wants the boy whose party it was. Not sure I can do that as feeling way too protective/cross still

And really thank you so much for all your understanding today. I know the general mn wisdom is tough-love when it comes to party invites but its hard when its your own dc.

Anyway - have moaned enough and now must move on

Weight-wise - god I'm a nightmare. To be and stay the weight I feel best at takes a lof of self-discipline hence my fluctuations.

NY, I am certainly heavier than you at the moment!

Tracey, I wouldn't invite that little boy over either!

About weight, I have a max. that I don't want to go above (8st for me but am only 4ft 9) and I most prefer being 7.5. I fluctuate between those two weights and adjust portion size/snacking accordingly. Weigh myself frequently to make sure I don't slip over.

Those of you that are bfing, I put on 4lbs within a matter of weeks when I stopped . Agree with Bonsoir about walk to school keeping a few lbs at bay, but I don't walk anywhere near as far as you Bonsoir.

I love food and my downfall is crisps. I am a savory monster.

Tracey, how sweet that your DS wants to invite that boy to play. Could be a good idea, no? How long have they known each other? Could it just have been an oversight? Maybe your DS was off school on the day that the boy was writing the invites??

Fritzi, my DH is the same if he's not happy at work. Make sure to give him the chance to apologise . DH's apologies to me usually start with him offering to make me a coffee. If I consent, it usually comes with an apology IYKWIM. Silly this dance that we do, I know.

Zembo, thinking of you today and hoping you are getting things sorted.

No time for proper post, but Tracey really feel for you. We had similar situation last week, when dd's best friend wasn't invited to party of another little girl in the class. Dd's friend was in tears last monday when all the other children were talking about how much fun the party was Turned out that the invitation was emailed out and dd's friend's mum never checks her email. Have heard of incidents like this when invitations are sent by text. Could the invitation have gone astray? Your ds1 sounds like such a lovely boy, I can't understand why anyone would purposly exclude him.

Umm. Tracey No, I wouldn't invite the boy over either. Not just yet. I can be selfless but not where DCs feelings are concerned....!

I too feel comfortable on the lighter end of the scale...under 8 stone. Just the way it feels but I have friends who are similar heights and maybe weigh a fair bit more and to me look trim, so . Its about build/bone structure etc and it's also a feeling I guess. I am careful to not ever discuss weight etc in front of DCs...my Mother was always on a diet. Although, very bad, totally non-cute situation last week at swimming whereby DD (3) said very loudly. 'look Mummy, that Lady has a very fat tummy...' Horror, oh horror. I died inwardly. I kept my head down and ignored the remark, chatting sunnily about tea etc. etc...(having remembered an aherm, slightly larger Lady who had been there the previous week) but DD was insistent...I ended up doing the glare and luckily she diverted her attention to trying to retrieve snacks from the change bag....anything, anything!

And can you beleive the 'fat tummy' thing stems from nursery discussing Father Christmas, and someone saying he had, black boots, red jacket, white beard, and a fat tummy....

She didn't thankfully have a white beard...phew....

Oh, but even funnier, both the elder dcs announce frequently that their daddy has a fat tummy...

Weight is a funny one for me. At the moment I'm a size 10, verging on an 8 and look the slimmest I have in some time. But, I weigh 9st 4 lbs and am only 5ft 3 ". I really must be very heavily-boned. My lowest adult weight (when i had ishoos and was deliberately avoiding food) has been just under 9st and I was beginning to look very drawn. I tend not to weigh myself, but go by the fit of my clothes.

bloss I completely agree re Boden cardigan.
Am also on look out for raspberry cardigan.