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Step-parenting

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Boundaries - goodwill or taking the piss ?

56 replies

Profpudding · 22/05/2025 19:07

I absolutely acknowledge that my perspective might be skewered here by the fact that my ex-husband and I split up and that was it. We agreed on the nights that we would have the children and we stuck to it like glue.
On the very rare occasions that my ex needs to swap, I will accommodate it
But I would never ask him to be honest. I’d rather make whatever I need Work work then be reliant on his Goodwill.
So this is completely alien to me.
Very much at the Dating stage.
His ex has a crisis with her family.
And he needs to cancel on me with less than an hour notice.
The first time it happened I greeted my teeth and smiled
It’s happened this evening again and I’ve gotta be honest. I can’t even speak to him. I’m livid.
If his child needed him, I would expect him to put his fork down and get in the car and go.
But this was very much a her problem.
And the first person that she’s called is him for assistance.
And he’s jumped to it
It’s almost as if he’s afraid to say no to her.
I don’t even know if I can be bothered to have the conversation or whether to just wrap it up.
He seems to think that this is perfectly acceptable behaviour and he’ll see me next week 😳

OP posts:
Girlof6 · 12/06/2025 19:46

My partner used to be like this with his ex, I very quickly told him absolutely fucking not. He doesn’t do it anymore but she’s still a nightmare 6 years later. I wouldn’t recommend.

Profpudding · 12/06/2025 21:31

Girlof6 · 12/06/2025 19:46

My partner used to be like this with his ex, I very quickly told him absolutely fucking not. He doesn’t do it anymore but she’s still a nightmare 6 years later. I wouldn’t recommend.

I do feel for him, but yes its going to be a long 16 years for him.

ive met someone else ☺️

OP posts:
Stepmum2111 · 12/06/2025 23:34

Good luck. Hope he doesn’t have an ex with children.

Profpudding · 13/06/2025 05:33

Stepmum2111 · 12/06/2025 23:34

Good luck. Hope he doesn’t have an ex with children.

He doesn’t. I’m avoiding those like the plague as most sane people should ☺️

OP posts:
Stepmum2111 · 17/06/2025 13:17

Profpudding · 13/06/2025 05:33

He doesn’t. I’m avoiding those like the plague as most sane people should ☺️

Beginning to think I may have made a big mistake myself. Too old for this shit with crazy exes.

Profpudding · 18/06/2025 12:52

Stepmum2111 · 17/06/2025 13:17

Beginning to think I may have made a big mistake myself. Too old for this shit with crazy exes.

I have absolutely no regrets walking away.
I’ve kept in touch with the other one because he is a lovely human being, he’s a nice man.
And I truly do wish him well, but I cannot imagine there’s a woman alive that is going to put up His situation, That he would want if that makes sense

OP posts:
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