2 teenage children stay with dad/stepmum 3 nights per week. If mum needs to change these days, they always have to be ‘swapped’ (dad won’t just have them an extra night). Dad/stepmum had twins a few years ago and since then teens have mentioned feeling as though she has changed towards them. Recently mum has been going through some major life stress and has needed to leave her home, asked dad to have kids during week nights so they can stay in school/ do activities and she will collect them at the weekends (taking over the weekend day they’d usually stay with dad/stepmum too). Dad agreed but stepmum called mum shouting about them having 4 children and dad being unable to cope under stress and lots more which was basically just attacking the mum’s character. Mum has always been polite and respectful of stepmum but had noticed being ignored etc when she would say hello over the years. No idea why other than stepmum judges mum because of history with struggles/conflict with others.
dad has always told children his home is theirs and they can stay whenever they like as now they are older and can look after themselves. But stepmum has disagreed on these occasions because it messes with her routine I.e she wants to go to bed early although teens stay in their rooms anyway.
should also mention for the past few months dad has done the majority of after school activities because mum has physical disabilities and was unable to keep up with them. Stepmum has been resentful of this although apparently unaware of mum’s disability. That was something else she was shouting at mum about. Mum very upset both at the character assassination and feeling as though her children are unwelcome at their dad’s house. Stepmum is resentful of help provided by dad to mum. Think there are some jealousy issues too.
WIBU?