Me and my partner have been together 4 years and we don’t live together. We go weeks without seeing eachother sometimes as I work full time and he doesn’t. He has 4 kids and seeys them every other weekend. I’m not to sure about the relationship with the children’s mum because he doesn’t talk about her often. Last year I was pregnant and he talked me into having an abortion as he claimed ‘it would upset his children’ so I did! I aborted my baby because it would upset his children! Also I was unsure about having a child with an absolute waste of space who has never had a job. We didn’t see eachother for 9 weeks as I refused to drive and see him, it was a test to see if he would get a bus which is 45 minutes to see me as he claimed he missed me, nope, 9 weeks went past. I feel like I have been tricked! He told me to collect him in my days off as he had a special surprise planned, so I did.. only to learn there was no suprise. He asked me to take him to smiths toys to do Christmas shopping for his kids and me being a mug I did! When we got there I felt such a overwhelming feeling of sadness, as we was walking past the prams and the baby items it hit me that I should be shopping for our baby’s Christmas presents yet we are filling up the trolly for his 4 kids. Nothing thrown in there for my daughter (I have a teenage daughter who’s dad died when she was 3) no mention of my daughter. It was all about his kids, then he gets the phone out and calls the ‘baby mum to ask her a question’ this left a bitter taste in my mouth. I walked off and dyed a few tears with the sleeve of my jumper. I went silent.. stone cold silent, he kept asking in a sarcastic tone ‘what’s your problem’ I replyed ‘nothing’. We haven’t spoken since and heys sat downstairs in my house. I thought he finnaly might have realised that he isn’t doing enough to sustain the relationship and finally he has seen sence and he finally saw my worth and wanted to treat me.. nope no treats.. just shopping for his kids. This happened last year too when he promised me a handbag but it was a ploy to take him to Ralph Lauren to but a tracksuit for his son! Again walked away feeling like a taxi driver. I am battling feelings of resentment, resentment towards them all.. he talked me into aborting our baby but yet drags me out to but his kids gifts and expects me to be okay with this. Please can anyone tell me if I’m being evil? I have so much pent up emotions.