Partners ex wants to come on our family holiday AIBU

[Tishtun]

Hi everyone.

We are planning a big family holiday next year and my DH has two children from a previous relationship aged 11 and 9. I've been with DH for 6 years and this will be the first time we will have taken the kids abroad. And the first time they have been abroad.

The ex has been quite difficult with contact but we see the children EOW and half the holidays.

We have asked the ex if we can take the kids and her response was she wants to come along. Because she doesn't want to miss out on seeing the kids having fun!

My DH did shut this down straight away. We don't have a relationship with her its pure transactional. I would be very uncomfortable with the ex coming along. Now the ex is saying she won't let the children go as its not fair she won't have that experience with them. AIBU. I think that's very selfish of her and causing unnecessary stress.

When I was a sm his ex went mad my dm had paid for me, dh and my dc to go on holiday. Wasn't fair she didn't get to see her dd having fun. We went on a weekend we didn't have dsd... My dm had never even met dsd never mind pay her place on a holiday! The same ex who refused dsd being a bridesmaid at our wedding. So we bought dressed for my 2 dd's. On the day dsd turned up in full bm kit..and ex kicked off she didn't match my dd's.. No winning op. Just no winning ime..

I do wonder about these people. Do they have no one in their lives to say ‘Don’t be daft, of course you can’t invite yourself on holiday with your ex and his new wife’?

This is 100% your husbands job to sort out.

Of course his EX isn't joining you.

If the children can't go then that is on her completely.

Do not get involved.

Just when you think you’ve heard it all. Just say no.

court order? Fgs I know you shouldn’t have to