I’m worried I’ve ruined Christmas

[SpongebobNoPants]

I’ve had a blocked nose for about 4/5 days and lost my voice, no other problems and none of the covid-19 symptoms stated on the NHS website.
I’m prone to allergies and sinusitis so it’s not unusual for me to have a blocked or runny nose.
My SD arrived here last weekend with an awful cold (of which we’d had no warning) which caused my youngest DC to get poorly, which in turn made me unwell but nothing dramatic, just cold symptoms.

Tonight (literally in the last 2 hours) I’ve developed a hacking cough and my lungs feel like they’re on fire. I’ve been able to book a covid test for the morning as there were lots available but I’m not sure how quickly the results come back and it’s our year to have my SCs for Christmas Eve.

I’m praying my results come back before lunchtime on 24th and obviously hoping it comes back negative.

Wtf am I meant to do? My DP is going to be so upset if it means he can’t see his kids and he has to isolate with me.

I know he’ll be furious too because I broke the rules to meet 2 friends this week after we suffered an awful tragedy regarding another friend of ours. We were distraught and I know it’s against the rules but we really needed each other.
We wore masks the majority of the time and were a distance apart so I’m worried he’ll blame me even though he’s a key worker and I work in an office 3 days a week so I (or we) could have picked it up from anywhere.

I’m so upset. I’ll be made out to be the evil stepmother who ruined Christmas.

It’ll be even worse if the results aren’t back in time so we’d have to miss out on seeing them and then get a negative result because I’ll have caused them to miss Christmas Eve together for nothing.

My DS was also supposed to be going to stay with his dad tomorrow night which will now have to be cancelled.

Also I went for a socially distant walk today with my mask on to visit a friend who’s child has just been diagnosed with leukaemia. We stayed more than 2m apart, fully masked up and outside but I’m still worried in case I am positive and the impact that could have on her seeing her child.

I don’t know what I’m asking for, I’m just really distressed and feeling very unwell
I don’t want to ruin Christmas for my DCs, DP or my SCs.

@lyinginthegutterstaringatstars I also didn’t knowingly meet up with a child with leukaemia. I saw him before he was diagnosed and was actually the person who encouraged his mother to take him to A&E after she showed me some of his bruising.

@lovelemoncurd

The results come back in 24 hrs.

They really don't. The labs are working at full capacity at the moment, so test results may be delayed. DD's test took 56 hours to come back a few days ago.

The advised between 24-72 hours. I hope it’s soon 🙏🏻

Depending on where you are a lot of tests are coming back in under 24 hours so will hopefully be fine.

@middleager op had the cough when she got the test so it's not a new symptom.. If she develops a fever or loss of smell then that's a new symptom which would require another test and self isolation. But if the test she had for her cough comes back negative she doesn't have to continue to self isolate.
Attached copy of email from when we had ours yesterday..

Op my test was Sunday 8.30 and results back Monday 10am so not too long.
I had what I thought was sinusitis Saturday and didn't think anything of it but temp Sunday so got tested ASAP just like you with your cough. However if I hadn't been going back to work I probably wouldn't have thought to test as I often get a temp with bad sinuses. Gp this morning thinks the sinuses were possibly separate to the covid but can't be sure.

I would have been pissed off with the fact that she came over with a bad cold that immediately infected everyone else (this is a massive pet peeve of mine) and from the sounds of things this could have been where it started. I would not accept any bad attitude from your partner, her or the ex as a result of this.

You have become ill and done the responsible, non selfish thing of informing the people you were meant to be seeing and not exposing them without warning or opportunity to have a say. The same cannot be said for the other side.

My SIL came over yesterday with two of her kids with a stinking cold without warning us and I am still seething about it.

@moglovesmincepies I suffer with my sinuses terribly! Which is why it’s not uncommon for me to have a blocked or runny nose. I would literally never leave the house if I stayed in every time one of my nostrils was blocked.
It is also not a symptom of coronavirus although some people can have a runny or blocked nose in conjunction with covid but it isn’t a symptom of actually having covid IYSWIM.
At least that’s what the NHS guidelines say.

I’m not sure this thread is helping you OP. You’re feeling ill, you’re defensive about your actions prior to being ill, DP is possibly being unsupportive but it’s a stressful time for everyone. If you’re sure you’ve done nothing wrong then whether it’s a cold or covid, well it’s just bad luck and if Christmas plans change there’s nothing anyone can do.

Gosh, so sorry for your friend.
Try not to worry, if it is positive, you could have caught it anywhere. I had a test in October for very similar symptoms to yours, but it was negative x

You need larger dosis of vitamin D not as part of a multivitamin. That's the best way to get better sooner.

@AnneLovesGilbert I don’t feel I have done anything wrong other than develop symptoms.
I’ll just feel so guilty if DP misses out on seeing his kids at Christmas because of me, even if it is out of my control.
If I’m honest I’m not particularly concerned about catching covid, it’s just the awful timing of my illness that’s making me feel awful.

@SpongebobNoPants

Thanks for the advice *@BlueJag*. I’ve been taking multivitamins for a few days now

Get some VitD separately too, there's not enough in a multi

At first I thought you'd been pretty irresponsible too, but having read all your posts & having a level of comprehension, I can see that you haven't.

Your DH would be unreasonable to blame your meeting up outside with friends as the reason you have Covid (if you even do). It's MUCH more likely to be either if you at work or from the kids at school, as you've told him, so he needs to get back in his box about that.

Did you have a go at him when his dD made you & your DD unwell? I'm guessing not!

I can understand him being disappointed if it means you can't have his kids, but it's not your fault & if he's shitty about it, then I'd be rethinking my relationship. Especially if there's any hint of resentment over him looking after your kids & making Christmas as nice as possible for them.

Ignore the poster acting like a dog with a bone! What DH's Ex allowed her Dd to do when she was unwell & what you have done are worlds apart!!

How was your test?

[quote SpongebobNoPants]@AnneLovesGilbert I don’t feel I have done anything wrong other than develop symptoms.
I’ll just feel so guilty if DP misses out on seeing his kids at Christmas because of me, even if it is out of my control.
If I’m honest I’m not particularly concerned about catching covid, it’s just the awful timing of my illness that’s making me feel awful.[/quote]
It's not 'because of you' though!! It's NOT your fault

If you have it, it's MUCH more likely you got it from your key worker DH, your work or one of the kids! FAR FAR FAR less likely from
one of your masked friends outside!!

Stop feeling/acting guilty!

IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT💐

Thank you @WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants.
Test was fine, I’ve had one before so I wasn’t worried or anything.
I’m just such a wimp with a terrible gag reflex!

I have facilitated two tests over the course of December (DSS and DD in different weeks) and DF has also recently been for one.
I'm SE but tier two (so not London area) and both tests down here were back within 36 hours. DD was done at 6pm on Thursday night and results received around 10pm Friday night. DSS 11am following week Friday morning and results received around 1pm Saturday. Drive through centre in Wiltshire (although we are in Hampshire)
DF lives in Cumbria and went to a walk in centre - test around 10am Monday morning and results back around 1am Tuesday morning this week. (All negative thankfully!)

So actually the closer to Xmas the shorter return times went - my experience has been the earlier in the day you take it the shorter the response times.
The only time I've had a good few days for a result was as part of the NHS ipsos mori survey which was done via post and that was sent on a Friday morning and results received the following Monday so I think postal testing may take longer but not sure.

@zaffa thanks! I got tested at 9.30am so I’m hoping I’ll have my results back early tomorrow morning

'Alas', sadly I'm not tier two anymore!!
Good luck with getting results back fast; my experience overall (we have had quite a few tests over the course of the pandemic but luckily all negative) is they are generally pretty fast

Good lord, this thread is all heart.

1. Op, youve done nothing wrong
2. the risk to your friend would have been minimal. This is covid, not zombies from world war z. Wearing masks, on a driveway, more than 2m. Come on people. Bluntly she needed your support and you did the right thing.
3. your DH needs to grow up. It’s one Christmas, people need to get over themselves. Including your DH. If you have covid, he should be more concerned about making sure you recover than whether or not his kids can’t see him. If my ex rang tmrw saying he has symptoms and can’t have the children this year, it is what it is. My concern would be that he has what he needs and recovers. The children would be fine.

Just rest up. If you have it, nothing you can do. And if your other half is an arse about it, I’d think long and hard as to whether that attitude is good enough in a relationship. I certainly wouldn’t think it was.

@SpongebobNoPants

Thank you *@WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants*. Test was fine, I’ve had one before so I wasn’t worried or anything. I’m just such a wimp with a terrible gag reflex!

I have a VERY efficient gag reflex - absolutely dreading having to have it done!

Fingers crossed for results early tomorrow 🤞🏼🤞🏼Oh & hope your friends DS gets good treatment fast & makes a great recovery!

OP, be kind to yourself.
I really don't see what you've done wrong. Meeting outside and maintaining distance. Where I live, many people don't even believe in this thing.
If your DH says something again, tell him that you understand his dissapointment about Xmas, but remind him that you and your kids got sick after his daughter's visit and it's not the end of the world. Seriously, some people have problems which are more serious than not having they children exactly on Xmas day.
People like complaining about this, but I recently heard an interview of a woman whose 2 daughters were killed this summer and she was pretty harsh about people who can't spend one Xmas differently without making a big deal out of it.
DON'T feel bad and take care of yourself!

Thank you @sassbott and @Anuta77 for your kindness.

Well presents are wrapped, food delivered arrived last night and everything is prepped.
I feel absolutely horrendous. I very rarely get ill or complain but I am sat here on the sofa struggling to breath and crying. I cannot remember a time I felt this unwell.

My friend’s sick child spent his 5th birthday yesterday in hospital starting chemo so that really puts my silly chest infection into perspective.

On the upside we received some great news! He’s been diagnosed with A.L.L type B which is the best possible outcome as it’s the most treatable type of leukaemia and has the best long term prognosis. I’m so happy for them that there seems to be a small glimmer of hope in such a shitty situation.

This week has been an emotional rollercoaster and I’m completely drained both physically and mentally.

Get well soon OP. Any news on your test?

Not yet but it’s been less than 24 hours

I am rooting for you all the way that you receive a negative test result this morning, Spongebob. Please let us know as soon as you know yourself.

You still have a cold but hopefully will be over that by tomorrow.

If you are unwell and have to, for example, keep to your room or to two rooms, I see no reason why your husband cannot have his children over and have some fun with them and yours while you keep your distance. You say you've prepped everything food-wise which is the biggest job and he isn't completely helpless.

This is not your fault!

I'm glad your friend's child's diagnosis is not as serious as it could have been though it is still very worrying for her. Poor kid.

Good luck! I'll be thinking of you until we hear.