Will try to keep this as unidentifiable as possible!
I have a 1 preschool child with my partner, He has 1 about to start collage.
Dsc lives with mum but visits often, sees dad every other weekend etc etc.
Maintenance is paid, half of other costs, regular FaceTime contact, one on one time as they share a hobby.
I get on well with dsc.
Current issue.
Finances are tight , dad rightly pays maintenance from his own finances and I, if feeling so inclined will occasionally treat dsc from my own.
We do share our pot once our own individual commitments are accounted for.
Start of the year dsc was planning a 'big' prom night, dad went halves (was quite a bit of money!) No issue with this, even though it didn't go ahead.
Mum got refunded for the majority and nothing has been said.
Dsc had several abroad trips booked with mum planned.
I have arranged a few days away specifically aimed for children under 5.
Booked and paid for by me. It's during term time as I couldn't afford school holiday prices, for my child. Both myself and dad would be going on said trip too.
Dad couldn't afford to contribute to this trip as he gave dsc a hefty amount of money for prom so this was all on me.
Long story short, mum's trip with dsc didn't happen (as it turns out she's not actually booked anything) and she is furious that I have arranged a trip for my child and not included dsc. Dsc will be at collage!)
Tried explaining that I had a very limited budget and couldn't actually afford to go on said trip during school holidays and it wasn't something dsc would enjoy as it is so focused on a pre schooler.
Dsc was included in our 'big trip' which has since been cancelled (Thanks covid) which involved staying at a friend's cottage. So again limited budget!
So I guess I'm trying to work out if AIBU for not including dsc is this little trip focused on my dc?
My own thinking was dsc got something they really wanted from dad so I was fine to do something focused on my dc.
I should also point out that the total cost of the few days away was half of what dad handed over for prom.
It just feels very much like dsc is free to do whatever they wish and with whomever , lots of lovely treats and one on one time but if i/we do anything with my dc it must include dsc at all times.
Am I being unreasonable here?