Partners Kids

[404yme]

Been with Dp 2 years now. Although I have my own place (which I love!) it is about 40 miles away so I spend on average 4/5 nights a week at dp house as her youngest is only 14. She also has a 21 year old son at home.
Her son has always been hard work for her it would appear...selfish, rude, lazy and dp is well aware of the challenges he (still) puts his mum and sister through. He is ok with me however he is also aware that I do not like a lot of his behaviour towards his sister and mum, and we have never massively hit it off tbh. Her 14 year old daughter I have always got on great with - i do loads with her and happily carry out taxi duties, shopping trips etc.
In the last 2/3 weeks she has changed and is all of a sudden rude and obnoxious to me and I don't know why. She has also all of a sudden become tolerant of her brother which has never happened before however I do not know if the two are connected? I just dont know how to manage this as I cannot think what I have done to upset her?

That sounds tough and obviously confusing for you. What does your DP think of the change in her daughter? You need to try and work as a team. Have you calmly asked the DD if there's anything you've done that has upset her? Has her Mum asked her? That seems the obvious place to start and if you've already done that, it might be best to get your DP to try and work out what's going on.

Hi. - Have asked dp and she just says it is an awkward age she is at and that she can see an attitude developing in general. Not so sure and hard to be objective when feeling a touch hurt 😰

Could you talk to her? Use the time you are taxing her, especially a time when you are going out of your way to do it, talk about something pleasant, and when she's engaged, or clearly not wanting to be, say that you've noticed that she was a acting a bit different and that if there are issues, you definitely want to resolve them as it's important to you that you get along well. If she says she doesn't know what you're talking about, don't insist this time.

There's not much you can do then trying to get her to open to you, that is if there is indeed a problem because teenagers do go through phases and it might have nothing to do with you, or anyone for that matter.