Have I overstepped?

[TwoDots]

A few months ago, DP ex went on holiday without DSD. DSD was selected to be in a merit assembly where she won star of the week. DP asked me to go with him, so I did as I love DSD and wanted to be there for her.

Yesterday, for some reason his ex brought it up and had a go at him for taking me.

Was it unreasonable for me to go? Have I overstepped a boundary?

Her DP goes to school events and my DP never kicks off about it as he's happy he takes an interest.

Can't have it both ways. I don't like my ex's partner at school events -but my children are at a school where it's usually ticket only and 2 tickets per family - but I wouldn't take anyone else.

Always a tricky one. My DH comes to events for my children. Their dad doesn't like it particularly but is perfectly happy for my DH to support our children financially and as my ex lives 3 hours away he's not often able to go to events anyway. I always ask the kids if they mind DH coming to things (I ask them without him around so that they can say no if they want to). My ex's gf comes and watches some sports events that my son does occasionally and tbh it doesn't bother me. I'd rather she was interested than not. My SD's mum would throw a complete hissy fit if I appeared at anything school wise. Sadly that's more to do with the crap that she's told everyone about my DH rather than anything else.

You've done nothing wrong. If your DP and DSC are happy for you to attend, she'll has no ground to stand on.

Imo the ex can stfu - if the dsd wanted you there isn't that all that matters!!??

I used to do all DSS's parents evenings, awards things, sports events, because he lived with us and he wanted me there. His mum never bothered (and only saw him once a month). It didn't occur to me that it was overstepping a boundary.

Thank you

It didnt occur to me to be overstepping either, especially as her DP attends things. If it were the other way around I'd be happy someone is taking an interest in my DC

Thanks for the reassurance

If she had a genuine reason to have a problem with you she wouldn't have gone on holiday without her daughter would she. You've done nothing wrong.

I don't think there's anything wrong with you going, especially if she couldn't go. My DC's stepmum comes to school things sometimes and I think it's nice for the DC to see her there.

Her argument is that it made her look stupid in front of her mummy friends, as she wasn't there. Problem is she's rarely there and she probably feels I'm taking over? She then went into a rant about me not being her mum etc. All of this came as a shock nearly 3 months later

DSD was thrilled I was there, so was my DP. I loved seeing her on stage. I want to show an interest in her life and make her feel loved

No you haven't overstepped anything. It's a school assembly. The woman sounds like an idiot.

Please don't let this put you off - she is completely in the wrong. You are attending for your DSD and DP - not her. She''ll have to get used to it as there will be events later down the line where both parents (inc. you) will be attending.

I go to my DSD's dance events, school events etc... My husband's ex hates it but I'm not there to wind her up, I'm there for my DSD. My DSD is pleased to see both me and her dad so her mum can shove it up her arse for all I care lol.

Thank you. Will try not to worry too much now x

Of course it's not over stepping you are her step mum she wanted you there so did her dad the mother can think what she likes don't take it personally it's more than likely her own issues not your problem.