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Mother's Day

30 replies

TickingTimeBomb2017 · 25/03/2017 12:10

What are your plans?

I'm particularly interested if you are a stepmum and you also have bio kids of your own from a previous relationship.

Essentially, I've been left to get on with it - by both my ex and DP (who has insisted he's having his daughter on mother's day... whole different thread).

I'm pregnant in the second trimester. Hormonal. Feeling deeply unloved.

It's going to be a bit shit really.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
rainbowsandsunshine · 27/03/2017 11:17

My eldest DSD sent me a card which she bought after school with her own money, which was a nice surprise as I often feel like shes hates me!

The younger two DSC made me cards and inside were words that meant an awful lot to me.

My DD made me a card at school and I adore the way she wrote "Muthas Day", very nice day all round. I am appreciated after all! Grin

stressedbeyond123 · 27/03/2017 13:45

I have one DC with partner, and two DSD's.

had a lot off my DC, homemade and bought, which was wonderful and so appreciated - i did say to DH that the homemade stuff means so much more, not that i'm un-appreciative of the gift i had bought.

Oldest DSD bought me 3 lovely gifts, totally unexpected, and a mother's day card, which i am over the moon with....youngest DSD had naff all off her!

Considering the youngest DSD lives with us full-time and i do everything for her, i was a bit "put out" but didn't pout or anything...they have no obligations to buy me anything, but it does give me a warm glow when they think of me and make the effort x

AnneLovesGilbert · 27/03/2017 14:44

I had a card from my DSC "to my fabulous stepmum", which was lovely, and they woke me up by jumping on us to give it to me. DH brought me coffee and toast in bed.

They went back to their DM's late morning and her new bf had taken them shopping to get some gifts. All very uncontroversial rounds ours thankfully.

I've sorted gifts with/from them for father's day and DH's birthday since we moved in together as their DM hasn't ever done anything for any of it.

This is her first relationship so in the past we/I've taken them shopping for small gifts for occasions - e.g. we got her a pair of earrings for xmas when I was with them buying DH's gift from them.

It's a lot about the joy of giving for the DC. They often choose mad but incredibly sweet gifts and love an occasion.

DH and I give each other a lot of cards and small gifts - sweets for him and second hand books for me most of the time, also socks, jam, bits for the house - and they pick up on that and want to be part of it.

DSD is forever wrapping stuff in tissues, DSS makes a lot of things out of Lego or he'll gift wrap the can opener and hand it over as a present.

Mother's Day, Father's Day etc can be commercial and stressful, or nice excuses to make a bit of extra effort to show your appreciation and my card and toast reminded me that they value what I am to them and do for them - or they just wanted a piece of the giving stuff that was everywhere, and that works for me too.

I don't expect gratitude from them but that DH appreciates how much I do for his children and to support him means a lot to me. On mother's day and all the other days.

swingofthings · 27/03/2017 18:52

You'll probably find swing that the SMs sad at not having acknowledgement are not the same SMs that complain about having to pick up step child duties. There's not a 'one size fits all' SM stereotype at all.
Yes, I'm sure you're right ChickenJ

Nobodyyouknow1 · 10/04/2017 21:30

It's a hard one isn't it? My daughter is old enough now to make me a card spontaneously and asked if she could have scissors ,glue, glitter etc to make something for me which was ' secret' and my youngest stepson was there too, so I asked if he wanted to make something for his mum too and they happily sat down and made cards for their different mums.
Before my daughter was old enough and I was a single mum my own mother and sister always made a fuss of me. It was such a sad day somehow, my daughter's dad never acknowledges Mother's Day, even when we were still together it was ignored which hurt me terribly.
This year my new husband wrote me a lovely card thanking me for being a lovely mum and step mum to his kids. It meant the world to me, he hasn't don't this before. I confided in him recently that Mother's Day was pretty painful for me and I felt like a nobody.

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