I guess I'll eventually know

[TheMumsRush]

What's going in over new year! I guess when dh and xgf have worked it out ill find out what I'm doing! Grrrr! I hate that I have to work like this some times

And if I try to nudge things along I'm "over stepping and butting in" arrrrrr

urg this sort of thing annoys me, how is knowing what you are doing in your own life overstepping and butting in! I informed dp that anything that effects my life is ky business to which includes knowing when dsc are coming etc.

I've said that soooo many times, it's my life to! But dh is so disorganised!!! I really don't mind what we do, have them don't have them! I just want to know....aibu waaaaaaa!

definitely not bu! it's just comnon decency to inform you of plans that affect you.

Thanks flower, I can't rant in RL

We all three get on ok (as in i don't get involved) but it would be so much better if I could deal with xgf. I did once, got no reply. Dh got told "I will only deal with you about the kids" fair enough.

Things have gotten better since then though, but you can't push it

We found out about Christmas contact on the 18th Dec, which was earlier than normal. We still don't know what's happening on NYE....

Why don't you just make your own plans?

I think it's a woman thing tbh - XH is a pain and so slow sorting out contact, even now I'm getting texts about what time today should be bring my dcs back, but DP is just as bad sorting out times and days with his Xp! As a bit of a planner and organiser, it drives me mad!

I still don't know I can't make my own plans if I don't know who is going to be here.

Why?

In any other area of life, it's usual and polite for the "lady of the house" to know who's coming for dinner, needing a bed for the night etc etc - but on Planet Step Child there are a whole different set of rules ........

Because of a travel situation that I won't bore with, I need to know. I need to get stuff in/or not. I game my own dc to consider too. That's why!

My xh finally managed to contact me this morning about when he's having dd. A whole hour's notice.

I think some people are and like to be organised, others aren't and it doesn't bother them. Just like some people can cope with uncertainty and just adapt as things change, whereas others can't deal with that.

Yes, I hear you OP.

We have it on both sides here.

I only found out the day prior, that DS was going to his dad's on Xmas Eve. Despite me asking over 2 weeks ago.

Still don't know if we have DS in the New Year - or which DSS. Sigh...

I have taken to drink. It doesn't seem to matter then.

If it's any concellation, it annoys us step kids too!
I remember many years where my (very blasé) parents left me waiting to know.

Yes just, it can't be nice fir the kids either

I think there are times when it does matter that you know, and I think it's ok to push for an answer on those occasions. Not sure about the "lady of the house" thing though. Men are perfectly capable of getting a house ready for visitors or meals!