Random, please excuse

[NHAN]

I just felt the need to say

I F*ING WELL HATE BEING A STEP PARENT!! HATE IT, HATE IT, HATE IT, HATE IT. IT HAS BEEN HELL. I WOULD LIKE A MEDAL PLEASE.

There I said it and I feel a bit better. Sorry. Nothing against the children, they are/can be/could be lovely.

i feel your pain, I thought I was having it bad until I read your posts all I can say is we've all been there and its crap have a (((hug))) from someone else who hates it as much as you do

Don't excuse yourself.

I totally appreciate where you're coming from. It isn't so much about the children themselves ... though it is feasible that stepchildren can be horrid, just as your own children can be, the neighbour's kids can be, your kids' schoolfriends and so on ..... but so often about irresponsible/troublemaking/spiteful/unreasonable exes, partners who often seem incapable of consistent, responsible parenting and/or of applying fair boundaries to all the children in the family, and/or of taking decisions based on what's best for the whole family, and/or of showing greater loyalty to their current partner as opposed to their manipulative, emotionally blackmailing ex, and the trials of wider family politics with various family members interfering, stirring, sticking their nose in, showing favouritism to the "poor" stepchildren and so on. Then of course you also have to contend with the cliched view of stepparents - and step mothers in particular - still held by a large percentage of society, in which you are guilty until proven innocent.

I feel so terribly envious of any stepfamily where all the adults concerned deal with everything in an objective, civil, honest and fair way.