Wills, your children and step-children

[BloomingDaisy]

Dear MNs, Can I ask a personal question? Its my first ever post so please be gentle.

My DH and I are currently having 'discussions' about our wills.

He has one DC from his previous marriage and our first DC together is due early next year.

How have you and your partner set up your wills to take DC and DSC into account?

I'd really appreciate some views.

I haven't read all of this but we're in the same position and are about to get wills sorted.

We have DSD 1 who lives with us, and who I would hope would carry on living with us in the event of DP's death and DSD2 and DSS who live with us 50% of the time, again I hope this would carry on the same. We also have DS who is due in June.

The way we would like to set up the will (if possible)would be if I die, it all goes to DP, then he splits it equally between all the children when he dies. If he first dies first, while any DSC's who are living with their mum are under 18 his ex gets more or less the same amount as she's getting now from a life insurance policy that DP has taken out and I get the rest, which I'll split equally between all of them when I die.

If we both die at the same time it's more complecated. If they're all over 18 all money would be split equally. If any of the DSC's were under 18 DP's ex would still get the life insurance policy for them, plus an amount put in trust for them. But the way I see it is that you have to provide more for the child who would have no surviving parent, so in that situation only DS would get more.

It's so complicated isn't it!

maybe you should ask marlow wills for advice. She was great with us.

just a thought... but do you think its fair that bonus children get inheritance from potentially 4 income sources (bio mum and dad and step mum and dad) and bio children will ever only get inheritance from bio mum and dad?

That's how I look at it. I dont think its mean. As I have earned the majority of our family's wealth before I even met DP, I want DD to benefit from this. I dont see why DBS should get anything from this capital... he will get inheritance from his mother and a share of what DP accumulates- ie from his bio parents.... as will DD...

we need to sort this... argh...

I have been thinking about this and decided that as I my DSD who I see once a year will not inherit from me. She has her own mother to inherit from my DS only has me. I do not think it is fair that step-children inherit more simply because there fathers remarried. I have a financial obligation to my DS only and my DH has a financial obligation to his DD and his DS. If me and DH do split I would not expect any new wife/girlfriend to leave my DS money or provide for him. Now love I give in abundance and that is more important than money anyway. I will explain to DD when she is old enough that that is what will be happening and why. The same way I will have to explain to my DS why DSD has more of everything toys/holidays/outings etc than him is because she has two homes and two families buying things (birthdays/christmas etc) and taking her places and he has only one.

We havent made a will and really should
Our situation:
We jointly own a mortgaged house
DS17 (my son) lives with us
DSD 11 lives with her Mum
DS7 (our son) lives with us.

So we really need to work out how a will where the two boys are provisioned for until they are old enough, then it gets split equally. DSD would still have a home if anything happened to us but we would need to make allowance for maintenance.

But if I were to die (I am the main breadwinner) we would have to think carefully about how to do this - especially for DS17 - would imagine they would all still live together but he does of course have his own dad who has a house - we have all lived together for eight years.

Really should take some advice and get this sorted.

Foolio I totally agree with you in regards to they may be left inheritance from their real mother/her family. Ive just posted a thread along similar lines re savings which seems to have upset my partner.