Well that's just fucking fantastic - spot on my arse for Christmas.

[MichaelaFrey]

I'm a bit run down at the moment, I think it's a virus as I have sniffles, fatigue, aches etc... This last week I have developed cold sores, mouth ulcers, spots on the tongue and this morning, the piece de resistance, a bloody great boil right next to where the sun doesn't shine. I can't see it because of the position but it feels about the size of a pea and hurts. What can I do, Oh wise ladies of Sporner Corner what is to be done?

Hot flannel to draw it out??? Otherwise vitamin c and zinc tablets to get your immune system back to full strength?? Hope you feel better soon

Thanks shellyleppard. I'll try those. I've got some multivitamins somewhere I'll look out. Hot flannel will have to wait a bit as I've a list as long as your arm of chores to get done for the big day and rapidly running out of time. The time could not be better!!!

@MichaelaFrey at least its not on the end of your nose......😳🤣 Hope you feel better soon x

Are you in a relationship? If so, get your partner to squeeze it. It will hurt like hell at the time, but you will feel much better afterwards!

And if they are anything like my OH, will enjoy every moment of it!

I might save that as my Christmas present to him 😉

I can’t remember the name but if it’s what I’m thinking of don’t squeeze it yet it will hurt horribly! Oh I know bartholin cyst? Leave it for a couple of days and then if you touch it it will likely just pop and the relief will be immense!

Mine too! 😄

I saw the thread title and thought what an unusual list for Santa but each to their own

I had one earlier in the year, I can definitely recommend not squeezing!
I had to go to Drs get my bum out for two training Drs and the GP, and then another GP as in less than 24 it had gone from a pea to the size of a large egg, I could not sit properly and you could see it through trousers! I had to have antibiotics for it.
I was recommended salt baths.
Pretty sure it's not a bartholin cyst as its on you bum.

I'm so sorry OP and I do genuinely sympathise but your thread title made me 😂

Could be worse ... on your nose!

Can you try and get a photo so you can see it that way?

Ouch!!! Hot bath and try and reach it through your legs?

Where is this spot OP - next to your anus ( in which case it is a peranal
abscess or just a spot on your buttock ?

Hot salt bath is what you need and put some Savlon cream on it too.

fantastic for us ....

🎶 Good Queen Wench’s arse looked at,
on the feast of Stephen.
Pea-sized boil there was found,
Sore and round and even. 🎶

Have a great Christmas OP. I’m sure the inconvenience of a spot on your bum won’t spoil the fun.

Oh my Good Heavens @Hskatkat that sounds absolutely frightful. You poor thing. Keeping everything crossed that mine gets no bigger than a pea. I've got to sit in a car for most of tomorrow so that might move things along. Might take a hot water bottle to sit on!!!

Here's hoping Rummly! A Christmas Miracle and all that.

Right next to my back passage. It really is in a place I don't want to have to show to any medical professional. 😩

I'm feeling feverish and just a bit shit. I'm hoping that this is not down to a boil on the bum. Wondering if a brandy might help (to be drunk, not applied).

I've tried but my arms are not long enough and my arse too big. I've been going at it like Houdini with no luck.

Sitz bath (loads of salt)
Possibly a panty liner ( I hate the word "panty") if an appropriate area? Just incase it ruptures
It genuinely wasn't great I think two weeks if antibiotics x

I comisserate with you. I have had a massive, very red spot on the end of my nose for the past 5 days and it's only getting bigger. Nothing is working or hiding it. I could audition as rudolph. Luckily it's not very painful. I hope yours clears quickly in time so you can sit in comfort!