Angry twin emerging from my back

[PawPawNoodle]

Hi sickos

I'm yet to go to the doctor about this beauty growing from my shoulder. I thought it may be a carbuncle (Mr Noodle insisted there is many heads to this creature, although he helpfully chose to focus my hair rather than the pus-hydra itself) but now I think it may have unified into one super-boil. I have asked it for its thoughts on the meaning of life but so far it has screamed insults at me.

@OvenGlovesWillTearUsApart @Luckystar777 you have asked and I have given.

Yum yum

I’m jealous!

I might ask him to put on his big boy pants and burst it for me later. We are having tzatziki with our dinner though so he might not fancy it..

If he won’t do it for you, will he do it for us?

Did he pop it? We need an update!

Ooooh, delicious!

I had one just like that. It was too painful to squeeze so I slapped mag sulphate on it and a dressing, and did that over a few days.

Eventually it came up with FIVE HEADS. DH had a glorious time with it as when he squeezed one, the others squirted.

@PolPotNoodle I don’t think it’s ready yet. It needs a warm flannel on it to bring it to a head to really get the benefit.

Frots vigorously with anticipation.

I hope it grows a lovely moustache and makes you a fortune in advertising. God I’m SO JEALOUS.

That's a CARBUNCLE!!!

Well? Any update? >Pulls up comfy chair

Ooh hello, I didn’t see that I’d been tagged (I’ve changed my name). I just happened to be passing.

Lovely carbuncle there. How is it progressing?

Oh wow 😍

I get pretty nasty cystic arse acne sometimes.

One time a few years ago I was on holiday with my now-ex and we weren’t getting on terribly well.

We were needing to get out and about but I had a lump that was really bothering me.

Spornographic content ahead:

So imagine if you will, I was standing patiently with my gypsy skirt lifted up under my armpits. He got down on his knees and set to work trying to get the right squeeze action with his fingers on my left butt-cheek. My GOD it hurt but the resulting pus-pop was very satisfying for us both.

We bonded over that and the rest of our holiday was better.

Phwoar