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MNHQ

DryNites "Ask the Expert" Event with Dr Penny Dobson - Feedback thread

10 replies

AnnMumsnet · 01/10/2010 09:57

Many thanks for attending the Drynites "Ask the Expert" Event with Dr Penny Dobson.

Below are some questions for you - please do share what you learnt with the rest of Mumsnet.

~ Overall how did you find the event?
~ What specific advice did you get from Penny?
~ What else did you learn that you could share with other Mumsnetters with similar situation?
~ Will you be putting into practice the tips/ advice you picked up? ~ please do post again with an update on progress

Many thanks
MNHQ

OP posts:
Coca · 01/10/2010 10:07

Hi, I am really glad I went yesterday. It was very reassuring to hear about other peoples experiences. I learnt that there is a helpline and website (set up by Penny) for a charity called ERIC that offers advice and products to help with bedwetting.
Overall I think I came away happier to go to my GP and ask for advice, before I was worried that it wouldn't be seen as a legitimate health problem and it might be humilliating for my dd.

I'm sure more will come to mind in a minute Grin

hobbgoblin · 01/10/2010 10:47

Overall I found the event helpful. Though ultimately the upshot is I need to take DS to the GP, I picked up some useful tips and points to raise when I do discuss this with our doctor. I am more aware of the causes and options.

Penny was able to make links for me between daytime bladder 'twitchiness' and the night time wetting. She was also very relaxed and reassurring and explained clearly about the need to drink plenty throughout the day in order to help the bladder function properly.

As a result of the day's discussion and advice I will be trying to increase fluid intake, I also realise now that schools need to do more to support this (our school doesn't promote or support the use of water bottles). I will also be making a GP appointment for my son.

I hope we'll be dry by Xmas, will let you know!

Finally, would just like to add how friendly everyone was on the day, including Penny herself and everyone else involved with the set up. I would like one of the cameramen as my husband actually.

Nuttybear · 01/10/2010 11:15

Thanks MN for inviting me to this event. As promised some feedback
Dr Penny Dobson was a very qualified, senior nurse in this field and had the gentle touch of a good nurse. Not a TV hack type Agony Aunt Type person.
Tips I found from attending. I have a 6 year old so I?m going from that perspective.
Don?t stress which will stress the kid out too
Reward for tasks that are related to bedwetting. Not for a dry night which they have no control over. (because a wet night will mean the child might feel a failure but have no control)
Example of tasks
A. Remembering to wee twice before bed. Before brushing teeth then again after story
B. Helping you to change the bed
D. Remembering to drinking 6 -8 glasses of fluid
Maybe use a star chart for this
Keep a diary yourself of bedwetting so you have information ready for professionals
The professionals will look at kids from 5 now not 7 as previously.
Children?s brains can forget tasks that were automatic due to change in their lives. The experts don?t know why yet

Some children don?t have enough of the hormone vasopressin. This can be an inherited problem My sister wet the bed until 12 yrs)
Alarms work for some children sometimes it doesn?t
Drugs work for some children sometimes it doesn?t!
Majority of children grow out of it
Wearing nappies will not delay dry night.
Talking to My Mum last night she wished that my sister had night pants to wear as it would have saved her a lot of stress. We didn?t have a washing machine so she had to go to launderette every time!
Again thank you MN the location was lovely and it felt like a real treat instead of a horrible chore. Other MNs were lovely and so were the Drynites staff. & hobbgoblin If he was your husband you would have the problem of women throwing themselves at him!!!!!!!!Hmm Yes, he was lovely Blush

alemci · 01/10/2010 11:32

i have had a nightmare over the years with bedwetting. my poor son is nearly 13. he stops and starts but he has been wet for 2 nights this week.

I do feel he is improving though and he has hardly wet the bed for a few weeks. i think it is getting worse now it is cold.

nowit · 01/10/2010 11:41

Lovely Cameraman, and wasn't he great with the babies? what is it about attractive men and small children?
Anywho, I digress Blush

It was very useful and Penny was lovely, but I did get the distinct impression (and i'm sure she said it a few times) that we are already doing the right things?

I did take away with me the knowledge not to praise for dry beds which took a while to get my head around but I now understand. Also to echo the other posts, giving plenty of fluids, even at bedtime if necessary, is not an obvious thing to do Confused but when Penny explained about the expansion of the bladder due to more fluids, it made much more sense.

Thanks MN and all the lovely ladies I met, nice to see your MN nicknames, I wonder if we can guess who's who? lol
Anyone else dreading the video?

whomovedmychocolate · 01/10/2010 13:21

~ Overall how did you find the event?
-I found it very helpful - mostly because you do feel quite isolated - pushy schoolyard mums never have problems like this Hmm

Met some nice mumsnetters. I even got to know who two of you were - hurrah! Not dreading the video. Past caring for my own vanity at my very old age!

~ What specific advice did you get from Penny?

  • More fluids in the day to increase capacity
  • Be patient - you are probably doing everything exactly right and time will sort the rest.

~ What else did you learn that you could share with other Mumsnetters with similar situation?

  • See above.

~ Will you be putting into practice the tips/ advice you picked up? ~ please do post again with an update on progress
-We have embarked on 'operation six glasses a day'. So far we are on 3 so this is progress. DD still hates to drink but needs to. The bed was dry this morning (hurrah). Don't think nappy pants are the solution though. I still think having six times the number of sheets you think you need is just as effective!

whomovedmychocolate · 01/10/2010 13:22

Oh and thank you Ann for arranging it all. :)

zonkin · 02/10/2010 22:18

Overall how did you find the event?

Very informative. It has given me a new surge of energy in dealing with the bedwetting issue.

All the mumsnetters were lovely and Penny was very approachable. It was an enjoyable event.

~ What specific advice did you get from Penny?

  • Don't stress about it and don't stress your child
  • Don't reward for being dry at night but for smaller tasks (eg. going to the toilet before bed unprompted, changing the sheets)
  • There is help out there via your GP/school nurse/ERIC so go and get some advice.

I found the info about vasopressin interesting. Also I hadn't realised how important fluid intake is.

~ What else did you learn that you could share with other Mumsnetters with similar situation?

See above. Also, you are not alone and you will get there in the end.

~ Will you be putting into practice the tips/ advice you picked up?

Absolutely - have already started (rewards, fluid intake). Will make an appointment with the school nurse next week.

Finally, agree that the cameraman was dishy! And yes, I am dreading the video....

TheLadyEvenstar · 04/10/2010 10:10

Overall how did you find the event? Very informative and helpful
~ What specific advice did you get from Penny? That my nephew will get there in the end and when he feels uncomfortable about wetting he will be more inclined to be dry all the time.
~ What else did you learn that you could share with other Mumsnetters with similar situation? We as a family are not alone

~ Will you be putting into practice the tips/ advice you picked up? Yes my sister is already relaxing more about it and also trying the 6 drinks a day.

allstarsprincess · 04/10/2010 18:24

Thanks for the invite to this event. It was a very interesting day and I have been putting the tips to use already. Whilst DD is not dry again yet I am keen to continue with the advice given.

Overall I found the event fun, informative but relaxed. It was also lovely to meet some other Mumsnetters.

Penny was great at explaining the different causes of bed-wetting and why addressing each problem uniquely makes a difference.

Specifically I learnt that offering more juice/fluid helps. There is a tendency when children wet the bed to reduce fluids as bedtime approaches but Penny said this might not help. I have been giving DD more juice since the event and although she is not dry yet I believe she is dryer than before.

Also, Penny pointed out that praising for unprompted steps the child takes makes to become dry is the best way. So rather than praise a dry night, praise the child for going to the loo unprompted before bed etc.

I have already been putting these to practice.

Once again, Thanks Ann.

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