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MNHQ

Find out how Mumsnetters got help from their parents to get on the property ladder

457 replies

LucyBMumsnet · 17/12/2019 09:52

This sponsored discussion is now closed

Getting on the property ladder can be an uphill battle for first-time buyers - from the financial challenges to the legal paperwork it throws at home seekers, many rely on help from parents to make it happen. That’s why we want to find out if you’re considering or currently purchasing or have already purchased your first home and how you went about it.

So we are asking you what help you received or are receiving from your parents, if at all, and roughly, when this was? Who started the conversation, you or your parents? Did you tap into the Bank of Mum and Dad and how did you do that - through their savings, using their existing assets or property, them getting a loan, accessing their pensions or another way? Was it in the form of gift, loan or early inheritance? Did you seek legal advice and formalise the process with your parents? If so, how easy was it to sort out the legal side?

If you could, how would you change the process of receiving your parents’ financial support when buying your first home? If you’re considering saving for your own children’s futures - perhaps so they can buy a home - what’s important to you?

Whether you have considered, currently getting on the property ladder or already have your first dream home, post your thoughts on the topic on the thread below. All MN users who leave their opinion will be entered into a prize draw where 1 lucky winner will get a £150 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck,
MNHQ

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Find out how Mumsnetters got help from their parents to get on the property ladder
OP posts:
OhYouBadBadKitten · 18/12/2019 20:38

Mine didn't. Once I left to go to university that was the end of any financial support at all from my parents.

I'm doing things differently.

UpOnDown · 18/12/2019 20:44

I received no help from my parents.

dadStoner731 · 18/12/2019 20:53

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

RomaineCalm · 18/12/2019 21:14

My parents didn't help financially but did teach us to work hard and to save.

They never had much money but, like many of their generation, now have a property worth £££ but I know they went without a lot when they were newly married and trying to pay a mortgage.

I'd like to think that we will be able to help DC financially in the future but I also want them to work hard themselves and not take if for granted that we will be in a position to offer a huge house deposit.

Dogwalks2 · 18/12/2019 21:17

No help what so ever from either my parents or my husbands. We rented took up 2/3 of my husbands wage and I was on a pittance, long before minimum wages. We scrimped and saved and 8months after living on beans with no heating, every appliance switched off (didn’t have any food to put in the fridge anyway) we put a deposit on a tiny new build, lived there for 7 years then spent 4 years trying to sell it😫. Moved to our dream home, it’s not massive it’s in a nice area and we have the best of neighbours been here 20 years and going nowhere. We have good deposits to pass onto our children because we’ve not climbed the property ladder even though we are both high earners. Being comfortable in your home is more important than anything and you can’t be that if you are worrying about massive mortgage payments.

TreesSandSea · 18/12/2019 21:19

Not at all. DH’s parents lent him 3k for a deposit that he paid back the following year.

Alyic · 18/12/2019 21:19

No help from our parents, neither of them were in a position to help. Only my Mother left now, who has fritted away hundreds of thousands of pounds, cash from loosing two husbands and sale of Dad's family business, so no inheritance expected.

We gave our boy the deposit for his property and he will get inheritance.

alreadytaken · 18/12/2019 21:33

No help from parents at all except some small household items, they were not able to help. 15% interest rates, save a 10% deposit because your income is too low to get a mortgage on less.

Our child - offered a loan at less than building society rates but turned it down. Legal arrangements would have involved a formal contract and separate legal advice for them. They didnt take up the offer. So they have been gifted a 6 figure deposit, the only arrangement being a letter confirming that. Their partners parents are allowing them to live in the family home at minimal cost. Their home will be furnished for them if they choose to collect the furniture, they will probably opt for new.

Some children are considerably more fortunate than their parents. We have always put saving for our child's future before indulging ourselves.

RamsayBoltonsConscience · 18/12/2019 21:48

My mum loaned me £2000 for my deposit (1996 mortgages were much smaller then!) Luckily, refunding the deposit was part of the mortgage and I was able to give it back to her.

AllTheWhoresOfMalta · 18/12/2019 21:51

Mine gifted us some money and lent us a bit more for us to pay back in five years once we were a bit more on even ground (at the time we had young kids, I was working part time but our landlord has put the tent up twice in six months and so staying where we were was becoming unaffordable) but claimed it wasn’t a loan to help the affordability calculator. Thank God for them

suspended · 18/12/2019 22:10

My parents and partners parents gave us 15k each and helped with the renovation.

Bought our house for 140k and mortgage of 110. 4 years later it's worth 270k so we will pay them back when we sell.

suspended · 18/12/2019 22:16

Forgot to say we also saved 20k and spent that on full renovation. Heating windows electric new bathroom and kitchen

NamechangeProtectIdentity · 18/12/2019 23:22

Yes, mine have. They gave both my sister and I our deposits each time we bought a house. This was back in the day when 3.6k was a 10% deposit though! I've gone on to buy and sell 3 more times and parents contributed 5 or 10% each time. My last home they gave me 15k.
They weren't terribly rich, however saved and felt they should help myself and siblings move up the housing ladder. We've never rented, as this was seen as dead money. I will do the same for my DC, but I'm not so great a saver so likely to downsize in order to give the much larger deposits required today.

ILoveMyCaravan · 19/12/2019 00:41

No help whatsoever from my parents to buy my first property. But when my dad died, my inheritance enabled me to pay off my
Mortgage.

olivehater · 19/12/2019 07:24

Mine bought a small house for 90K in 2002 when I was a student. They rented it out for a few years and sold it to me for the same price when I had been working for a year and could get a mortgage at the end of 2004. I was able to get an interest only mortgage. By this time it was worth about 115k so it saved money but didn’t really cost them anything physical cash apart from the loss of their own profits. Unfortunately the tax man came knocking and they did have to pay tax on the difference but was still a great way to get me on the property ladder at the time. They also gave us the £8k we needed for stamp duty, when I bought my next house for £290 with my dh. Very lucky. I intend to help my children to if I can.

Elizasmum02 · 19/12/2019 07:56

my parents didnt help at all but my husbands mother had property abroad and sold it all and we split it in 3 ways, it paid a massive chunk of our own house off

JC4PMPLZ · 19/12/2019 08:28

gave me 5 Grand. It was a long time ago. That was 10% of price. Back in 1995.

NorthernLightss · 19/12/2019 08:29

I'm old enough to have been born during the time when women couldn't get a mortgage without their husband or dad co-signing it (late 40s). I knew it was important to have a savings record, so opened an account with a building society as a child and saved... My parents lived the idea that you saved first, bought later. How purchase wasn't something they felt comfortable with. A mortgage was a serious undertaking.

When it came time to buy, my parents helped in whatever way they could. I got a loan from them to help with the deposit. The main thing though was a careful attitude to money, and the idea not to live beyond my means.

NorthernLightss · 19/12/2019 08:30

How purchase = hire purchase.

cupoftea84 · 19/12/2019 08:32

Grandparents and mum helped me with the deposit and lots of household items they didn't need.
Dad is no help financially and never has been.
I'm very thankful and hope to do the same for my own children.

KrampusTime · 19/12/2019 08:40

It was my partners inheritance that enabled us to have a deposit.

10milewalk · 19/12/2019 08:45

My parents brought up the subject of a deposit for a house when I was planning my wedding, instead of paying for my wedding they offered me 5k towards my first home.

I would love to be able to help my children when the time comes, but sadly we are struggling to make ends meet as it is.

AR2012 · 19/12/2019 08:47

We're currently looking but the market is simply out of reach and i have no help from my parents.

Ganne1 · 19/12/2019 08:50

Moral support and advice was all they were able to give. However, when we did move, my father-in-law did go to B&Q and buy us a ladder to clean out the guttering!

Colonsay18 · 19/12/2019 08:50

My parents didn’t have money to help me join the property ladder. My father, however encouraged me by giving me financial advice which he was unable to follow himself due to redundancy and other problems. I developed an ‘I will succeed attitude’ and admittedly I took some quite risky financial decisions which worked out for me. Thirty years after potential homelessness, I now have a stable, well paying job and am over half way through a mortgage on a 3 bedroom detached house. I started by buying a property owned by a large building company. The previous owners had bought a new build house and part exchanged their ex council owned property. The building company offered incentives on the property including cash back which gave me the deposit on a 95% mortgage. I now have 2 happy children aged 7 and 9. I encourage them to save and am determined life will be easier for them.