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MNHQ

Find out how Mumsnetters got help from their parents to get on the property ladder

457 replies

LucyBMumsnet · 17/12/2019 09:52

This sponsored discussion is now closed

Getting on the property ladder can be an uphill battle for first-time buyers - from the financial challenges to the legal paperwork it throws at home seekers, many rely on help from parents to make it happen. That’s why we want to find out if you’re considering or currently purchasing or have already purchased your first home and how you went about it.

So we are asking you what help you received or are receiving from your parents, if at all, and roughly, when this was? Who started the conversation, you or your parents? Did you tap into the Bank of Mum and Dad and how did you do that - through their savings, using their existing assets or property, them getting a loan, accessing their pensions or another way? Was it in the form of gift, loan or early inheritance? Did you seek legal advice and formalise the process with your parents? If so, how easy was it to sort out the legal side?

If you could, how would you change the process of receiving your parents’ financial support when buying your first home? If you’re considering saving for your own children’s futures - perhaps so they can buy a home - what’s important to you?

Whether you have considered, currently getting on the property ladder or already have your first dream home, post your thoughts on the topic on the thread below. All MN users who leave their opinion will be entered into a prize draw where 1 lucky winner will get a £150 voucher for a store of their choice (from a list).

Thanks and good luck,
MNHQ

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Find out how Mumsnetters got help from their parents to get on the property ladder
OP posts:
Kissmycousinkate · 17/12/2019 21:10

Did it all ourselves. My mom who was a single parent taught me how not to budget! I didn't want bailiffs knocking on the door like I'd had growing up so taught myself how run my home very early on.

EggysMom · 17/12/2019 21:15

No help here. They could have afforded to help, but they didn't offer, and I wouldn't ask.

Rhinofeet · 17/12/2019 21:19

My parents and in laws were unable to help with deposits but my in laws did buy all of our white goods and my parents bought what they could afford to help us set up home.

They also acted as a sort term bank for loans for small amounts when our cash flow was sticky in those early, awful mortgage repayment years.

It's paid off. We're now settled and financially secure and have been able to help them relocate from the north to be closer to us in the south.

Concestor · 17/12/2019 21:38

My parents generously paid a 30k deposit for my first house so I could afford it on the mortgage of 53k which was the maximum I could get. I was paying it off but when I got married and moved they wrote off the debt which was amazing. I'm
So grateful as I'd never have afforded a home otherwise.

Mickhasnotorso · 17/12/2019 21:41

They didn't.

Concestor · 17/12/2019 21:42

Forgot the other info: this was in 1998 and we formalised it with a solicitors letter.

bionicnemonic · 17/12/2019 21:42

My mum and step father paid our deposit £22k.
On the day we went to pick up the keys to the dilapidated property we arrived to an ENORMOUS dead rat lying stretched out in front of the door! It may have been a portent...my husband and I broke up a few years later...

LittleSweet · 17/12/2019 21:50

They're abusive. They paid for me to go to college, but that was more to do with bragging rights over me being the first one in the family to get a degree. Everything I have achieved is in spite of them. Me and dh bought our first house aged 25. It was in the 90s when banks were throwing money at people. But I'm glad I did it myself as I wouldn't want anything from them.

emphasisofmatter · 17/12/2019 21:50

My parents gave us 1/3rd of the deposit, we paid the rest. We wouldn't have been able to move into our first home without it, it would have been another couple of years saving money without the help.

cptartapp · 17/12/2019 21:54

No -one gave us anything.
PIL gave SIL £10k ( she was moving next door to them!) but DH never got a penny.

iamNOTmagic · 17/12/2019 23:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

balletpanda · 17/12/2019 23:31

My parents bought us our fire, carpets and our sofas which was SUCH a massive help. Without it we could get on the property ladder but our house would've been empty

My grandparents gifted me £40k which was my deposit. I'm always in gratitude to them for leaving that for me.

PickAChew · 17/12/2019 23:56

They didn't.

SunsetOnTheHorizon · 18/12/2019 01:45

My parents, although weren't very rich, they loaned me 4k and this was way back in 2009.

They didn't ask for it back, just when I was good and ready. There was no interest on the loan and it was pretty much handed over when I was in the process of collecting a large deposit.

When we bought our 2nd house (sold the 1st) we were once again loaned £3000, more recently in 2016. It helped towards the bathroom renovations.

In regards to my children, we are saving towards a deposit and hope to save a lump sum for each child. And we are starting now as they are small and time flies as we all know. I feel the children need as much financial help as possible.

transformandriseup · 18/12/2019 04:38

My worked full time from when I was 19 and had started to save from when I was 16. My parents couldn't afford to save for me as they hadn't worked for several years due to illness but let me live at home with minimal rent while I saved enough for a deposit and let my boyfriend live with me too. It was actually a good friend of theirs who after a year of saving gave us the same amount as what we had saved which enabled us to put down a deposit. I was very grateful and was one of the first to buy a house in our friendship circle at 23.

Mumdiva99 · 18/12/2019 06:02

My dad offered me £5k (the money he'd saved for my wedding). I had broken up with a fiance, cancelled a wedding and moved back into a friends. So I was buying alone. My dad had always taught me good financial advice - save for what you want, don't get into debt, buy don't rent etc I had saved money too and had a reasonably paying job. I could have bought alone but his help allowed me to buy somewhere a little bigger and keep a little cushion of savings for emergencies. He covered most the 5% deposit. I was able to get a 3 bed house which I stayed in for many years....ending up living there with my now husband and 3 kids! I am very grateful for his help and would like to do the same for my kids but as prices and deposits are so much higher now I don't know how we'll do it.

BikeRunSki · 18/12/2019 07:10

We bought our first house in 2000. The deposits was £8k!!! I put in £4K savings, FiL matched it. DM couldn’t afford anything, but she bought us a bed as a wedding present.

DH and I opened savings accounts for the dc when they were babies, which we and FiL contribute to monthly. These will be for house deposits or uni fees etc.

brightonroc · 18/12/2019 07:26

Live in an area where house prices are 14 times the average wage. We would never have got on the housing ladder if my parents hadn't have helped. They passed on a large inheritance that was theirs to me and my siblings which made sure we would all have our own houses.

Hoping I can do the same one day too...

thiscouldbethehill · 18/12/2019 07:49

My parents saved for me from birth. They saved all the money ever given from grandparents etc as well and when I had a small inheritance that went in the bank too. When it was time to buy our first house my DH and I had a sizeable deposit. I am so grateful to them and am already saving so that I can hopefully do the same for my own children when they need it.

neverornow · 18/12/2019 10:02

Mine taught me to work hard and save hard. When the time came, they offered to give me my inheritance in advance towards my deposit, meaning we could put 20% deposit down and borrow less
Father also guided me when house hunting; he was very clued in, predicted prices would drop by a certain time period. He was correct, and we were glad we held out a bit.

MustardScreams · 18/12/2019 10:06

My parents gave me a very large deposit. They offered when I was pregnant with dd as they didn’t want me to rent. It was a gift with no strings attached. They have done the same for my brother and sister.

I have a very small mortgage which means I can put a healthy amount into savings for dd meaning she will also have a large deposit when she’s ready to buy a house.

I wouldn’t have asked for their help, but I was incredibly grateful when they offered.

PresidentBartlett · 18/12/2019 10:55

My parents own a percentage of our house which we are slowly buying off them. This was our deposit for the house. We also had some savings but the area we live in is very expensive and we'd never have been able to buy with out their help. They have done similar for my siblings.

For our kids we are putting a sum away each month so they have a lump sum off us when older that they can use for a house.

ChristopherTracy · 18/12/2019 11:00

My dad, though infirm and very ill, stayed in his house until he came to us for end-of-life care so that my sibling and I would have a deposit from his house when he passed away.

It was incredibly important to him that he did that as he had never had security of housing until very late on and he wanted us to be better off than he was.

mrswhiplington · 18/12/2019 11:19

They died. I sold the family home which was split between myself and my siblings and used the money for a deposit on the house I am now currently in.

SoftBlocks · 18/12/2019 11:33

They didn’t.