How do you make your DC1 feel as special as your newborn? Share with Fairy Non Bio for chance to win £300 voucher NOW CLOSED

[JustineBMumsnet]

Fairy Non Bio is sponsoring the Mumsnet Talk App, and in light of this, they’d like you to talk about your experience of making your DC1 feel special after you bring your newborn home.

Bringing a new baby into the world is always special but, when it’s your second bundle-of-joy, it’s possible that your DC1 will feel left out. Fairy Non Bio would like to hear about the ways that you’ve ensured your child continues to feel special following the arrival of their little brother or sister. Maybe you set aside a weekly block of one-on-one time with them? Perhaps you let them have some responsibility when looking after the baby, so they can feel like they’re involved? If there’s anything you do to make sure your DC1 knows they’re just as special to you as your newborn, share with Fairy Non Bio below.

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All who post on the thread will be entered into a prize draw where one MNer will win a £300 Love2Shop voucher.

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MNHQ

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We had a home birth with DC2. DC1 helped to set up the pool, he couldn't wait to fill the pool. We ate ice lollies side by side, which he brought for me.

He also came into the pool with me before birth, with goggles and swimsuit

After the baby was born he got to tell us if he had a brother or sister, we didn't find out before birth.

It was very special!

I just made it more about the family having a new baby rather than me having a new baby. I asked her what she was excited about and what she was looking forward to the most etc. Once baby number 2 arrived I made sure that DD1 was involved every step of the way, helping with cuddles, feeding, burping etc, really made her feel part of it all and it worked a treat. We did get her a small gift from the baby too x

we talked to our children very early on in the pregnancy and involved them in all aspects- so from pram picking to clothes etc
we also planned days out for when the baby would be here. worked well

Planned 'dates' with separate parents once a week, even if it is a 20 minute excursion to the local Sainsbury's for a summer ice lolly.

There is I only a year between my two babies so my older one was always my little helper getting nappies wipes . They are 3 and 4 yrs old now and are inseparable always have a knee for each when they want cuddles at the same time and tell them how much we love them . You have to do what works for you as a family .

Involving them in everything. Making sure they get 1 on 1 when the baby sleeps.

We involved DC1 in the preparation for DC2. We let her pick out baby stuff for her baby brother before birth, outfits, baby blankets, etc. We also emphasised that the new arrival was her baby. When brother Charlie arrived he was accepted by his sister who fell in love with him from day one.

Give DC1 quality 1:1 time when the baby is asleep. Even 15 minutes genuinely and generously given will reassure DC1 that they are not being supplanted.

I started this from day one by giving my DC1 a badge that said no 1 big brother, and got him involved in everything to do with the new baby. Also just a little word with family and friends visiting, so they could greet DC1 first to make sure he did not feel left out.

I gave my older kids lots of cuddles and kisses when their sister was born. My youngest son thought she was a toy because everytime he tapped her on the shoulder she'd cry

I can't speak from experience as I only have one child but as someone who was super jealous when my little brother came along perhaps I have some perspective to add to the conversation. I think the best thing is to include DC1 from the word go, make them feel part of the experience, don't send them off to the grandparents but give them chores to do such as helping change nappies and watching bathtimes and obviously praising their efforts.

Let them be involved with the newborn. I used a large nursing cushion to support the baby and enable my older daughters to give the baby a bottle. They loved being able to do something so important.

Carved out whatever time I could for DC1. Bedtime often workd, but the most successful was when baby napped and I was able to say 'Yay, the baby is asleep, now we can play!' (Even if playtime was only 15 or 20 mins)

I am expecting my second child and am concerned about my elder one. She is excited at the moment and we are playing up the importance of being a big sister to her.
This thread is useful in terms of seeing what you all do so thanks

Since having our twins I now try to do specific things with my older two. Such as small things like going to the library or park. We also treat them with family days out where it's more about what they like- we utilise national trust membership a lot!
At home we get them involved with the twins like if they have a bottlefeed or we all have 'tummytime' together.

But they are as special, in fact I worry it's more the other way round. With a first child everything, every achievement, is a big deal, for parents, grandparents etc Subsequent babies, not so much so. They just fit in with the family routine.

I think the best gift you can give all your children is one on one time - not easy to do, but very important.

My DC1 (the only one) is going to be 20 in September. I'm 9 weeks pregnant. She's over the moon and is going to cook us a reveal cake!

Baby 1 is the apple of my eye, and three more babies later, he still is, and he knows it. For a long time it was just me and him as we sadly lost his dad when he was a baby, and so when the other children came along later when I met a new DH 7 yrs on, I'm sure he felt quite worried...But like most mums, we would ask him to help us out, which made him feel important, and he would be in control of the pushchair when we took the babies out which he loved!
We would make sure that he knew as the eldest that he could stay up the latest, and because of this he worships his little brother and two sisters...which is all a Mum and Dad ever want, their kids to get along together and feel loved. x

My daughter loveed helping me with her brother by passing a nappy or choosing which sleepsuit he was going to wear, and I used to make sure she had at least 15 minutes of my time every day to do something she wanted whether it wa to read a book, do some colouring or play a game where her brother was well out of the way and if he cried someone else saw to him during that one to one time. I also used to talk to my baby son wbout what a good girl his big sister was being all the time she was being good in the hope that it would be repeated.

Justly making sure they are involved and enjoy the experience of being a big sister! We did the gift from baby thing which she loved and workout well with my first two! Im due in a few weeks and there is a bit of an age gap so it will be huge change for my youngest who loves being the baby of the family but i think just talking about the baby and getting her prepared has helped and seeing how excited she is getting! We will prob do the gift from baby again but I've also read up and heard that when they meet the newborn for the first time to make sure the baby is in the crib so you can hug and make a fuss over your other children first to reassure them and then let them hold the baby and bond! no idea if this will work but might give it a try

DP and I took turns with both girls when DD2 arrived. So I fed baby while daddy had cuddles with toddler. And swap. Never left out

chocolate fridays :P

When our younger two were born, we got the older one/s a present "from" the baby and bought the older ones Big Brother cards etc, made a fuss of them, that kind of thing.
When the novelty of the new baby had worn off, we would have specific days where my DH would stay home with the baby while I had one on one time with the older child, or vice versa - always making sure it was something like an activity only big boys could do, not babies (eg soft play or games in the park). This all worked to an extent, but ultimately we still had a lot of jealousy and sibling rivalry - and to this day, even though the eldest is 17 now, we still do!!!

We were worried about this and didn't want any one to feel left out. The baby bought a gift with him and the child bought the baby a gift to. We then got him involved with jobs like getting the nappies, picking outfits and holding the bottles, he loved all this and being part of it. When the baby napped I made sure we had special time together, reading a book or snuggling up for a film, playing play dough etc.
It worked as the little one is now 6 months and they love each other to pieces. Happy kids happy mummy x

DD is 2 and I'm due at the end of this year. We've let her know everything that is going on and plan to get her involved in all aspects so she doesn't feel left out. I've already bought things for the new baby and I've made sure to let her help me choose things. I'm planning on getting her a couple of presents from the baby when it is born so that new baby presents from all the family don't make her feel left out.