Do you struggle to juggle your career and family life? Tell us about your work-life balance woes and you could win £50 or tickets! NOW CLOSED

[AnnMumsnet]

Workfest 2016 is almost upon us (14 May), and in light of this we'd like you to share your career conundrums.

This one-day event is packed to the rafters with advice for women in - or returning to - the workplace, with a range of workshops and one-on-one sessions hosted by self-made entrepreneurs and career experts. It could be just what you need to kick-start your career, as attested to by these Mumsnetters from last year:

"I felt truly inspired and motivated...I have 'the fire in my belly' to move forward and reach my goals."

"The day was much more than I had hoped. I was and still am in awe of the speakers and gained so much positive energy."

"One of the best value conferences I have been to in a long time."

So perhaps you're struggling to kick-start your career post-kids? Or maybe you have a stellar business idea, but are lacking the practical advise needed to make it a reality? You might be in a rut, and are looking for ways to climb in your current profession. Whatever your dilemma, we'd love to hear about it, and would love even more to see you at Workfest 2016!

Add your comments to this thread and you'll be entered into a prize draw where one winner will win their choice of a £50 store voucher or a pair of Workfest 2016 tickets .

thanks, MNHQ

I am currently finding worklife balance near impossible. I worked pt after having dd1, got made redundant whilst pregnant with dd2 and then returned to Uni full time when dd2 was 2.5. I graduated last May with a 1st class degree ready to take on the world. I took a full time Senior Management role close to home 37.5 a week in an company that is on paper family friendly and flexible. In reality I work 60 plus hours a week I do school drop off most days but I am never home before bedtime and some days if I have and early meeting don't see dds at all . I don't have time to do homework or support them with school. My dh is very hands on we are a team but his job is demanding as well. We both bring work home every day I am so stressed that I barely sleep so I am constantly tired.
However my job pays pretty well and is flexible so I can always make assemblies and parents evenings but I am not allowed any holidays in school holiday time (except xmas) which isn't an issue childcare wise as my DH is a teacher but I want to be with girls. We have great family support and don't use any holiday or afterschool clubs.Written down it doesn't look bad at all, but I hate it! I feel like I am failing my children all the time and it makes me so miserable. I don't think it gets easier as they get older. My job takes over my life and I don't have the capacity to be a good mum and I am not doing well at work either its all too much.

Both DH and I work FT. DH does night shifts occasionally as he is much better paid than me. DC are 11 and 8, DS will start secondary school in September. We have a live-in au-pair as we have a spare room and bathroom, which is not cheap as we pay for her food + bills as well. We are both from 'ethnic minority' so it took us a lot to be where we are in our jobs now. Mine is not a great deal, I am in an admin position for a very large organisation with no future prospective for promotion but overall well paid. I leave work dead at 5 which means no promotion for me and dirty looks from my colleagues. My other female colleague has been promoted recently, now goes on maternity leave and they are not hiring a maternity cover. I also have been told that due to bench-marking exercise I am not getting my 1% annual salary increase. My employer is also no-flexible hours friendly.
I feel that my DC still need a lot of attention and I love them to bits and prefer to spend as much time as possible with them and help them with the homework etc. On another hand we can afford exotic holidays minimum 2x per year for the whole familiy which keeps me going to work.
Ideally I would work 4 days per week, but currently I cannot find job that would pay the same pro rata.

On the plus - I work part time (4 days) and am paid well so can afford a nanny who does the washing and cooking etc. She's also there when the kids are ill.

On the downside, life is INTENSE and there's no downtime at all. I didn't realise this until we stopped for Easter.

DH has a very high powered job and we both commute.

School is not helpful, asking for a costume or project with a few day's notice, arranging assemblies and concerts with hardly any notice. It's such a juggling act.

And the guilt is IMMENSE, especially as I don't have to work (financially speaking).

My DCs school has no wrap around childcare. The nearest before/after school club is full. There are no childminders doing drop off or pick up to the school.
My career options are limited to finding a job within 10 miles radius of the school offering 9:30am - 2:30pm hours.
These jobs (where available) are generally paying around NMW and on zero hours contracts. Which means I can't afford to put my children in activity clubs for the holidays. I earn less per day than the £50 it costs to put my children in a holiday club. So I don't work much in the holidays, just grab odd hours here and there at the weekends.
And it isn't really a career - it is marking time until my youngest goes to secondary school.
The work bit of my worklife balance is sadly lacking.

I did struggle but I've now readjusted my work life so I have interesting work but less of it and I'm around more for my children.
I'm a public sector non-executive director for about two days a month and take an average two days a week consultancy, part of which I spread over school hours.
My pay cut was quite big but as we have enough to live on in our case it's just a question of cutting out fripperies.

Hi, I've addressed my work life balance by not having a real job for the last 8 months. I've never been happier. Or poorer.

I returned to walk after maternity leave when my son was 11 months old - working a 3 day week. This was perfect & I worked like this for 18 months. My son loves nursery & this was a good balance for us both.. However, I became less interested in my job & an opportunity arose for a new job which was something of far more interest to me - the catch was it was a full-time post. I umm-ed & ahh-ed about it for ages, but eventually went for it - thinking I'd give it a go & if it didn't work out, I'd look for something part-time again. Working full-time has been hard going, but I do love my job. However, my home life has suffered & I'm not prepared to compromise that any longer - I have just reduced my working hours to 30, so I'm only in 4 days a week now & my husband has dropped half a day so LO is only in nursery 3.5 days pw now - yay!! :)

It's the inequality of expectations that I find hardest. Expectations from my DC. I think (as I have before, actually) that I might actually be CMOTDibbler and just haven't realised it, since our situation is exactly the same as she describes. DH and I have similar careers, earn similar amounts, travel for work and work at home when not travelling, and we have no paid help. Trouble is, although DH is perfectly capable of looking after the DC, somehow it is only me that gets the massive guilt trips (overt from 9yo DD, quietly sad from 13yo DS) about being away. They store up requests, troubles, etc for when I get back rather than telling him and go into mourning when I say I am going.

That said, having spent a weekend with friends in a not dissimilar situation with much younger DC, I would say that it does get easier as they get older. Apart from anything else, our DC are as find of a lie in as we are, so an occasional family pyjama day is a lovely relaxed lazy thing for all of us - something which just doesn't happen with small DC.

I work 2 days a week term time with the occasional extra day per week. I'm a supply teacher with regular jobs in one school. It works ok but I really want to get out of teaching and into the business world. DC's are 8 and 11 but one has SN and childcare is nigh on impossible. I can't leave him with grandparents so would need an au pair but both DS have to have their own room, due to SN so no space. In terms of work /live balance it's ok, some work, some time at home ( or hospital appointments) but it's not fulfilling. I can't see a way out of it just yet though.

With number 1 I worked full time and had him in nursery- it was awful, and I still cry just thinking about our 11 hour days out of the house (including public transport commute). Lucky for me whilst pregnant I got swine flu, and during my hospital stay my mum came and took him to nursery a few times. She saw how hard it was and said she would help out with no.2. My current situation is truly enviable- my mum travels 300 miles down to us each week and stays over to look after the kids whilst I work 2 or 3 days. No more getting them out of the house at ungodly hours, and there is always a family member to attend school events or care for them whilst sick. My husband is also a teacher so all our holidays are covered. Don't hate me

Should add- we only live in a two bed flat, I bought a bunk bed with and extra bed which pulls out from underneath, my Mam and the kids sleep there...

I have some problems with work/life balance but that isn't really to do with work. I work full time and am currently 37 weeks pregnant. DH is a SAHD to our 18 month DD however appears incapable of actually doing any cleaning around the house. This means that a lot of my free time is spent cleaning and tidying rather than actually spending quality time with DD which I find very frustrating. When I raise this he states that he doesn't have enough time - I manage it when he leaves me with DD!

Sorry to derail. Work are generally very good and flexible, letting me work from home if necessary (for example when DH went into hospital)

My biggest work/life balance issue is my husband's job. I am fortunate that I work for a very nice firm who are supportive with days off for childcare, and allow working from home on occasion to help.

However my husband is a police officer, and the belief within the police is that all he officers have a lovely little wifey at home who just sorts everything out. They are less keen for him to take short notice days off work to assist with childcare when DC is ill, and have on several occasions outright asked him why I'm not at home to do it (umm, have you seen how much you pay your PCs?!)

I feel like I am fighting on two fronts. It's not my work that's the problem, but the knock on effect of his work that is the problem. Plus how it looks to my work that I have to pick up quite so much slack. I do appreciate that being a police officer is one of those jobs where you can't just walk out when you want to, but it's so tiring for me.

I work 3 days (21 hours) at least that is what I am paid for. I regularly squeeze more work into my 3 days than some FT colleagues do in their whole week! But as posters before me have said, I have to leave on time to pick up the children and leaving on time is seen as a negative.... It's far better clearly to swan around doing cock all but be seen to "work late". The whole department is under a lot of pressure to deliver, but there aren't physically enough bums on seats to do all the work required. So we're all demoralised. Being part-time makes me feel like a jack-of-all trades.... Work aren't getting the best of me and neither are my family.

I want to become a freelance coach but struggling to see how I can do it with childcare costs. I'd need to give up work for a bit, and worried it wouldn't take off and be successful.

I have a severely disabled child who requires 2:1 care. I run my own business (no-one would employ me with ds1) but that has been very difficult to keep going with ds1's increased care needs. His needs are now so high that DH also has to get home by 3.30 each day to provide the 2:1 (& no, we can't employ carers).

An increased care package is finally going to be happening soon but it has taken a very long time for the council to organise and has been incredibly difficult. We have had no balance - we are either carers or desperately trying to catch up on work. Our other children have really missed out. We are lucky that both of is have had flexibility in our work, otherwise we would have both struggled to even keep a job due to ds1's care needs.

worrying whether going part time will damage my career

Currently considering wether or not to go back full time after doing a 3 day per week phased return after maternity.

After the days working I literally curl up and go to bed. I get up at 5.30 and get myself ready, 6am I get two girls up, washed and dressed. 20 mins for breakfast, we leave at 6.45. I don't drive so walk down to my mums which is about 30mins. At 7.30 I get the bus which takes just over an hour to work, work 9-4.30, and then just make it back in time to collect DD2 from nursery at 6pm. We then walk to whatever granny/ grandad/ brother has picked DD1 up from school that day, this can be anything up to another 20min walk. Then we walk home, quick bath and into bed. Homework is currently done on my midweek day off, as well as family time, swimming etc. Also fit in uni work then and at weekends. Clean the house, do never ending loads of washing and fit in food shops etc.

Going back full time would at least give me the chance of career progression and would stop me having to rely on Tax Credits. With Universal Credit looming this would be a huge relief. I'm trying to learn how to drive because that will cut down the time spent out of the house (I can drive to work in 30mins) but trying to fit in lessons as a single mum when you already rely so heavily on family to cover work is a PITA.

Hmm... Descsions.

I'm a SAHM, id like to return to work but nursery for my twins and after school club would be more than I'd be earning

I have several business ideas and would love to put them into practice but find with young children i am exhausted and lack the focus and motivation.
I also feel guilt that if I spend time setting up a business instead of with them i will never get these young years of theirs back. Part of this is thinking that if i fail i have wasted a lot of time and money, as opposed to just getting a job in that you will definatly get paid so not wasted time.
I think as well a lot of it is a lack of confidence when being out of work for a number of years, my eldest was surprised to discover recently that i have worked doing other things than raising kids - i even doubt myself at times that i am able to be in the grown up business world again. How do you work on getting that confidence, motivation and drive back??

I am self employed and work from home which of course means I can work when I like and spend lots of time with my kids.... Wrong :( I work more and earn less and find myself telling my children far too often ' sorry no we can't bake together/go to the park/visit family as I don't have time' and it breaks my heart.

I work self employed, which is great in one way for working around school hours and clubs and illness, but can be a nightmare in the school holidays. It does help a bit, as I can rearrange some clients until later, but there are still regular clients that need to be seen and childcare is often an issue. I often have to work evenings and weekends to make up any time missed.

However, I remind myself that it is still easier covering self employed hours than it would be to find childcare for 8-6 five days a week for 13 weeks of the year...

Being self employed also means that I can always attend DC's school plays etc as I can work around them.

I do feel guilty when DC asks me to spend time with them but I do the best that I can to spend time with them.

I'm a sahm because childcare costs would have wiped out my wage. in 2 years I will need to start working again and I worry it's going to be hard to get someone to employ me when it's been so long.

Thank you everyone for your comments. The winner of the tickets or voucher is heritagewarrior.

I think it is a struggle juggling the costs of childcare and wanting to spend more time with them rather than working