Do you have a funny tale of household horror? What terrible things have your DCs done to your home when your back was turned? Tell Valspar and you could win a £300 Love2Shop voucher!- NOW CLOSED

[AngelieMumsnet]

Have you ever turned your back for what seemed like seconds only to return to a pencil/crayon ‘work of art’ on your newly painted walls? Has there ever been an ‘incident’ involving a TV and a football? Have your children ever wreaked havoc with an unguarded tin of paint? If so, Valspar wants to know.

Valspar say "With great durability, Valspar Paint can withstand even the toughest parts of daily living and maintain its colour (even hundreds of scrubs!). So if those tiny, mucky hands and colouring crayons go astray – fear not. We have made sure you can scrub away the mess without the worry of taking a layer of paint off too – just in case your little one does decide to release their inner Picasso on your living room walls."

So, what are the most awful, or funniest, things that your children have done to your house while your back was turned? Whether the crime was big or small, Valspar would love to hear your stories.

Everyone who adds a comment to this thread will be entered into a prize draw where one winner will receive a £300 Love2Shop voucher.

Thanks and good luck,
MNHQ

Standard Insight T&Cs apply

I could write PAGES of the damage my kids have inflicted on my home alongside the usual drawing on walls etc. However, the three incidents that spring to mind are :

DD (then aged 2), walked around the lounge with a fat red marker and drew on every surface, including the TV and my new cream sofa and chairs, the walls, the cabinet, the coffee table and indeed the carpet. It took her five minutes to do while I was washing up. That was an insurance job. My DS (also aged 2), put the plug in the sink in the bathroom, turned on the tap and walked away. The first we knew something was wrong was when the electrics blew and we were plunged into darkness as the water cascaded through the ceiling. The damage was huge and expensive. Lastly, I walked into the kitchen and caught DS peeing in the dishwasher. He peed in absolutely everything, but that was something else .

DS when doing the "no pants" method of potty training, must have been about 2. Comes running up to me, so excited, shouting "Mummy poo! Mummy poo!". Check in the potty, nothing. Ask DS where the poo is, he runs upstairs. By this point I'm dreading what I'm going to find, so am walking up the stairs checking very carefully before I put my feet down!
DS had done an enourmous poo, right by the side of my bed!
I couldn't believe how much there was, took me ages to clean it up!

DS again, must have just turned 3. "Helping" me make breakfast.
I went to answer the door quickly, he must have been out of my sight for a total of 10 seconds. I get back to the kitchen to discover the worksurfaces, cupboard door and DS's head entirely covered in peanut butter, and he was just starting on the marmite.
It took so long to get the mess out of his hair, in the end I had to take the clippers to it!

Lastly this one is me!
I think I was about 5 or 6 at the time.
We had a beautiful Bearded Collie (they have very long hair) I decided I was going to give the poor thing a haircut, and took the kitchen scissors to him!
Imagine a long, swishy curtain of hair, with a massive jagged line cut in it!
Mum caught me just as I was cutting his "beard".

Neither she or the dog were talking to me for about a month afterwards, and the poor thing looked really raggedy for ages!

I've got lots of drawings on walls/doors. Usually small and most have washed off. Makes me laugh when they deny doing it but they've helpfully written their name :)

I think the worst to clean was when DS (about 2 at time) managed to empty a whole bottle of baby oil over himself and the hallway carpet! He was super soft for weeks but the carpet didn't recover well - luckily an old carpet, just meant it was pushed up the list for next replacement :)

I have learnt that peace is not usually a good thing!

My ex-mother in law came to stay after I had my second child, to help out with my 3 year old daughter. The two did not get along... Grandma, every night at dinner would reel off all my daughters misdemeanors which wasnt very nice and I had asked her not to do it. My daughter would sit there understandably, with a very grumpy face. At dinner one night, (despite my request not too) grandma began to reel of the slights of the day but my daughter jusr grinned. "Why are you smilling?", grandma asked. Because I have been a good girl - every night this week I've cleaned the toilet... with your tooth brush... there was silence then we heared a 'ping'. We looked toward the noise. My daughter said "dont worry, its ok I've just sterilised granmmas spare teeth and glasses in the microwave too" Touche Grandma!

I once had a little boy over for a play date. I turned my back and they decided it would be a good idea to use my daughters play cooker as a toilet!!!!

Thankfully no horrors as yet with my 22month old although the other day I looked back at him after literally turning to put the remote down and he was stood with a wet crotch and wet all down the legs and a wet patch on the carpet .
I thought for a minute I'd forgotten to put his nappy on but then as he walked towards me I noticed his empty beaker behind him. Phew!

Thankfully no horrors as yet with my 22 month old. Although I did look back at him the other day after literally turning to put the remote down and he was stood with a wet crotch and wet all down the legs and a wet patch on the carpet.
I thought for a minute I'd forgotten to put his nappy on but as he walked towards me I noticed his empty beaker behind him. Phew!

Dd2 once painted the inside of her ears blue once she had finished her picture. Why? Just why?

Pirate Map in biro on leather chairs less than a week old - the artist was my darling son aged 4. Hard to deny when he put a rather large initial on it too!!! I was less than pleased. hairspray (after much googling) removed some of it but I can still see the evidence 6 years on.........

DD coloured the tv with crayon all over the flatscreen. twice.

she also drew in green pen all over a cream footstool.

she also used a black marker pen all over the UPVC patio doors.

Dd3 got into tge pantry, found the instant whip, and decided to make us pudding. In stand whip powder, 4 pints of milk, 2 dozen eggs. Some in the bowl, most on the floor/down her front/in her hair.

And never ever let us mention the metanium incident...

While at work my eldest two where with their dad playing tea parties. Their dad had gone to do the washing up and put dinner on as i came home to walk on a carpet ringing wet with water where they decided to let the carpet have some water(pretend tea). Took a few days to dry out

Ha, this is very topical, as only yesterday I had one of those "Facebook memories" things come up, that said this time 6 years ago, my then three year old son had just admitted to "accidentally" redecorating my bedroom wall with multi-coloured crayon scribble, as far and as wide as he could reach! We painted over it at least three times, but in certain light you can still see it!!

When little they got into the larder, emptied all the cereals out of their packets onto the floor, along with all the flour and all the sugar.. it was a disaster zone

we had a new conservatory and porcelain tiles laid and my grandson one day at aged 2 grabbed a black crayon and drew over the floor, it took hours of cleaning to get the marks off, but there is still a faint line

been quite lucky just a few spills here and there think i have got off lightly!

Spilled an entire box of Frosties on the floor right before we were rushing out the door...what a mess!

When my daughter was 2, she decided to make me a cake while I was busy in another room. I came in to find eggs, flour and milk mixed together all over the coffee table and dripping onto the floor - but it was hard to be cross with her as her intentions were very sweet!

You know that slime stuff kids like, the bright green goo? It doesn't come out of cream carpets. Ever.

DD has Valspar in her room, so while the carpet is ruined, the walls are still nice.

my then 4 yr old DS2 loved his tool set. we found him on top of the bunk beds having hammered an enormous hole in the bedroom ceiling. DH made him fill it , sand it and repaint it himself (aged 4). he is now making a successful living aged 21 as a plasterer ....

Me: How did you get egg on the wall?
Four year old: I sneezed

My DS has always been getting us into pickles in our army housing. He has peeled up carpet, thrown spaghetti hoops over our lovely, none waterproof magnolia walls, drawn lovely scenic prints on the walls - but I think the worst has to be when he slammed his door into a unit he had moved and it caved in - rather than tell us he closed the door and we found out just before march out!

We've had a few household terror incidents! The worst by far was an incident involving sudacrem! My youngest (age 17MONTHS) somehow managed to find the tub, smear it all over his sister (who at 5 obviously 'allowed' this!), all over the floor, all over the fireplace and my shoes.. literally in the space of 2 minutes!! I do think my DD age 5 slightly 'helped' though!

I've been quite lucky really ...only thing like that my boys have done is colour a patch of the pinkish carpet blue...just as the landlord was on his way over!

Nothing terrible by my own but when my friend’s daughter came to visit when she was two she ran into my flat, picked up some of my partner’s rocks from his collection (hiking souvenirs), threw them at his guitars and scratched them, knocked the lava lamp over and left marks all over the paintwork on the wall, all whilst I was still taking my shoes off!