The Goose and Carrot July Edition

[Lougle]

All welcome, and everything disappears after 90 days.

I don't think that's a universal experience @drspouse . Two of mine have been at an SEMH school and one college has been very welcoming of DD2. The other wouldn't have been welcoming even if she was heading from mainstream because it's her needs they won't meet, not her school status.

Is his EHCP updated to reflect how he behaves and copes now?

It is not, that's what we are appealing for. But the solicitor has said this is an issue (just the type of school) and the tutor wouldn't touch him due to the type of school because it made her anxious.
The other school (not the one we visited) also emphasised they couldn't cope with his SEMH problems.
As yours are girls, @Lougle, I can imagine people would be less nervous of them.

We don't know of any SEMH schools in our region that have any reasonable level of outcomes and the safeguarding issues in so many of them can't just be a coincidence. Of course it's possible that other types of specialist schools have huge safeguarding issues but nobody ever finds out. I can imagine it's frightening if you have a child who is nonverbal too.

@ drspouse - if I recall correctly, Stanbridge Earls closed down because of it. I am aware of other schools, which have had safeguarding issues - and I didn’t live in the world of SEMH.

I suppose what I'm getting at is that it isn't the SEMH school that makes providers hesitate, but the SEMH needs. I agree that a dysregulated boy will be assumed to be more of a handful than a dysregulated girl. However, in DDs' school there are two 2:1 students and they are of different sexes, so it doesn't always follow.

There are three that have closed in our region, two that were subject to undercover investigations, one we know had safeguarding issues but closed for financial reasons. Two including DS school have had teachers in court for abuse.
I only really keep an eye on those local to us (and the fact that local families have inside knowledge).

Making progress with vaccinations. There are 3 to have. It’s being suggested that they should all be done at the same time. Has anyone had experience of having multiple at once? It’s for practical reasons so there is only one home visit but I’m worried about side effects.

It isn’t only SEMH schools who have safeguarding issues that are known about. Other types of placements (and linked residential homes) have had them too.

For most DC with ASD, their SEMH needs are secondary to their ASD. Because of this, for lots of autistic pupils, ASD SS are more likely to be able to meet needs because SEMH SS and ASD SS often use different strategies/approaches. Obviously, that’s a generalisation based on the overall picture. There are some exceptions.

@TheGoodCat I am pleased you have made progress. I don’t have experience of having multiple vaccines in older DC. Not DC but I have had flu and Covid vaccines at the same time. That was OK.

They would generally use a different site for each and record what they had injected where. Are you comfortable to say which ones?

Td/IPV and Men ACWY are both usually given in year 9, at the same time, in different arms. MMR catch ups are also given at the same time. HPV is usually given in year 8.

Am I being unreasonable to think that it's not ideal that DD1's Psychiatrist is willing to increase her antipsychotics without reviewing her? I've written quite a detailed email of why I'm concerned about her, and I think she's relapsing. A secretary has written to say that she's passed my email on and the psych is asking if I want her to send a prescription for an increased dose. I would have thought that calling her in for review would be the appropriate first step??

@Lougle not at all unreasonable to have a review, essential I would have thought. Sorry DD1 is relapsing. Apparently 3 injections HPV1, Dip/tet/polio and Men ACWY that’s the 3 you said are usually given together, I think?

All I can say is that DD2’s psychiatrist adjusts doses of her antipsychotics, during telephone conversations. I doubt they have enough appointments to give every patient a review face to face, every time their antipsychotics need adjusting? (Considering adult mental health services at least, should really be named Psychosis Services)

@TheGoodCat those are the ones that DD2 had last year “year 9 age 13/14” in each arm and she was fine. I gave her paracetamol as precaution and she felt bit blurr for 24hrs but equally that could have been the anxiety build up to having them as we had to drive 30mins to the local town & it was in a church hall for “catch up” kids.

@Beachgosling thanks for the reassurance. So 3 injections in total? 2 in one arm and one in the other?

Date for tree now arranged for 6th August. We were out the house today and DD said DS cleaned the bathroom floor and also rescued the cat when he let him out with the chickens by mistake. Well it's the chickens who were rescued really.

So we need to make a safeguarding report about school. And they will know it's us because DH was the only parent who witnessed the event.

@drspouse Imo, DH has to do the right thing to protect other vulnerable CYP, who might not be believed on their own?

Apparently we have to report to school first anyway so we will do that.

There are several schools in our area that have had some frankly awful things going on. I assume that’s the case all over the country. Predators go where the prey is. It’s something I often want to talk about here with people I know but obviously can’t because it’s a public forum.

I would do the vaccines separately because id see it as a learning experience and better consolidated.
I will look at the extension to motability rules again if they’ve changed. I’ve been a bit under the weather which is why I’ve been so quiet. Drs have taken a gazillion tubes of blood so hopefully they’ll get to the bottom of it. My uber dieting and exercise madness has worked though and my type 2 is in remission and I am now firmly “overweight” rather than obese. How gratifying to see the science in action.

@Wellzizizbetter never been more delighted to read that a goose is overweight. Whatever the bloods reveal it’s not without your best effort. Get well soon.

i think separate injections would be best but i have asked nothing of the system for so long that I’m in danger of making us small again to aid efficiency and not be a bother.

@inthequietofdawn how is DS1?

Sorry you've been feeling unwell @Wellzizizbetter and well done for getting into that next bracket. Not easy when there are so many demands on you all the time.

@TheGoodCat if you think separate vaccinations would be better, stand tall and say it like you mean it, knowing you have a flock of geese behind you. You know your DD and she's just a number to the NHS.

I'm even more confused by the psychiatrist now. She wrote to the GP asking that DD1's meds are increased in the morning, then 3 days later the evening, but the total dose stated in the evening is lower than she's on now. Fortunately, I log all changes in my phone calendar in red, so I know that she's been on her current dose since April. It did make me panic though, that I've been giving her more than the psychiatrist thinks she's having.

DDs 2&3 have prom tonight. It's only 2½ hours because the venue forgot they had their bingo session beforehand and need an extra hour for changeover.

DH is in London this weekend. I'm pleased he's spending time with his brothers but the timing is rubbish because this week and next week are absolutely packed, the house is in disarray because the utility room ceiling is being repaired and contractors wanted everything including the fridge freezer out of the room, and DD3 has her driving test on Monday.

That sounds very busy I get those meds moments and do exactly the same red on the calendar tracking. Ds’s new meds should have started but I’m waiting for a letter. I wish they’d hurry up. I have builders in at the end of the summer and I’d like him to have settled a bit first.
How are you all managing in the heat? Ds has aircon so is sleeping but my other children are struggling a bit. Like half the country I am considering something built in for next year.

I am definitely thinking of getting air conditioning for next year in DD1’s downstairs bedroom and the lounge - the rooms where she spends the most time, and both face south west. The kitchen diner faces north and is relatively cool.

I am also thinking about her bedroom in the care home; but her house will be knocked down within 2 years, and replaced by new houses. It’s whether it’s a cost effective use of her money for maybe one summer?

As for meds, when DD2 was on methylphenidate, a controlled drug, the psychiatrists were always making mistakes on the prescriptions! One time, the ICB decided to change all patients to Delmosart, because it was cheaper than Concerta. We had to take the prescription back three times, because pharmacists refused them, as they didn’t comply with pharmaceutical guidelines!

@Lougle I hope DD2&3 enjoy their prom. I don’t think you are unreasonable to want a review when you report a deterioration in DD1’s condition.

@TheGoodCat if one at a time is what DD needs, stand firm.

@Wellzizizbetter well done on the weight loss. I hope you are feeling better soon.

Aircon helps, but DS still struggles in the heat. DS1 is still unwell. He has had some bloods taken. Some of the bloods that are back are looking off, but not horrendously so. Waiting on other blood results and various cultures. We have spent the last 48 hours chasing his blood sugars, which are all over the place.

I am expecting a hefty bill for the aircon use. Where temperatures are not dropping at night if the unit downstairs is not on the ones upstairs work a lot harder to process all the rising heat. Bedroom units have been fantastic for keeping calm, regulated and getting sleep. The difficultly for us is now that we are finally in a rhythm of leaving the house 3-4 times a week that routine has been disrupted and is causing distress. We have not left the house for too long again and not moving enough has its own issues.

DM is on the waiting list for a survey from an aircon provider. It is taking a very long time due to such high demand.