how do u cope with comments like these?

[jenk1]

comment no 1. R u sure that DS is not "putting on an act for the psychologist, he,s not like that at school is he?"-from my mother-surprise surprise.
comment no 2. If he were my son i,d have smacked him and sent him to bed by now-that from my bil when ds was getting upset on his gamecube

OMG at both. . These people have no idea. All ou can do is try to let it wash over you.

Dont have experience of special needs myself, but do have a friend who's 7 year old is ADHD and was told by the headteacher "Your child does not have ADHD, you just lack parenting skills".

Sorry you're having a hard time jenk, you can either get into a long argument with them or develop the skill of looking like you're listening to them while playing show tunes in your head.

Cant believe these are comments from family though, sorry you're not getting a lot of support.

jenk1 dh's BIL asked whether we had thoguht about giving ds1 a good smack. He's 6 severely autistic, completely non -verbal. Then I politely explained why that wouldn't woork. Now I'd tell him to f* off I think!

thats awful jimjams that your bil would say something like that, my ds has as but is not severley autistic like your ds, i cant believe someone would say that to you, im just starting out as ds has only been verbally diagnosed recently, am just finding it so hard that the people that u would normally look to for support ie. family are suspicious and not helpful,u dont know what hard work and emotions are involved until u have a child with sn,i dont know how an 8 year old child can "put on an act for psychologists" in my opinion they are too clever to have the wool pulled over their eyes..but then what do i know....

Do either of these BILs have children? If not, I would say to them "Well, if violent agression would be your informed parenting choice esp. with a child of special needs, then it's a good job this child isn't your is it?"

Do you know sometimes it is like educating pork - people just don't take you seriously. It is like you (and your child) go through the trauma of having your child poked and prodded (mentally) by every consultant possible and still you seem to have to prove they have SN!!
Mind you the worst is when you get 'have you seen anyone about it?' - well no, of course I haven't - duh!!!
Done ranting now - sorry Jenk I know how irritating it can be.

ps Jenk if it is any consulation I often go home in tears, always wearing my dark glasses!! Sometimes I feel so alone because all people say to me is that he is progressing and he will catch up - then I just feel selfish for feeling like I do!!