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SN children

Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.

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Original poster

OMG I feel so sick in a complete panic

23 replies

meea · 08/03/2005 12:43

Clinical psy is due at 1 .I am really nervous can't make my mind up if I want him to say he is fine or that he has seen the problems we see.
Oh god my hands are shaking.

OP posts:

Dingle · 08/03/2005 12:46

Can't advise meea. Just sending lots of

{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}} to help you though it!

Jimjams · 08/03/2005 12:46

Good luck- whatever happens it's always better to know one way or the other.....

Keane · 08/03/2005 12:47

oh poor you meaa :9 hope it all gets over and done with as quickly and painlessly as possible

Toothache · 08/03/2005 12:47

Good luck Meea - Don't know your history, but it must be very scary.

onlyjoking9329 · 08/03/2005 12:51

good luck with appointment, i am sure you are hoping they will say you are just being paranoid and its always a shock if they say you are not, just remember your child will not change with a DX you will still have the same child but help/support/education can be better targetted if you know what difficulties your child has, don't think of it as a label, see it as a signpost, good luck and let us know

ThomCat · 08/03/2005 13:03

Good luck, thinking of you.

coppertop · 08/03/2005 13:14

He/she will be there now. I hope it's going really well.

amynnixmum · 08/03/2005 13:18

Good Luck Meea.
Hope everything goes ok.
{{{hugs}}}

Original poster

meea · 08/03/2005 13:24

Well he has been and gone.
His description of ds2 sounded like a completely different child.
So no help for him how can he be so different around me to how he is at nursery.
I feel like they must think I am paraniod.
Going to go and have a good cry will be back later with more details.

OP posts:

amynnixmum · 08/03/2005 13:27

Oh Meea {{{hugs}}}

chonky · 08/03/2005 13:35

oh meea

MandM · 08/03/2005 13:36

Meea - I am so sorry , I feel terrible for you. I don't think I can say anything to help, but as you know there are loads of people around on here who will be able to offer you good advice.
Thinking of you. x

Keane · 08/03/2005 16:11

meaa

coppertop · 08/03/2005 16:13

Oh meea. I wish I could help in some way.

JaysMum · 08/03/2005 16:24

Oh poor you Mea.....thinking of you.xxx

Merlot · 08/03/2005 17:44

coppertop · 08/03/2005 18:50

Just checking in to see how you are, Meea.

Original poster

meea · 09/03/2005 11:31

Thanks you your thoughts everyone.Still feeling very lost today.
Spoke to dh last night and he was as stunned by his assesment of ds2.He also felt that it sounded nothing like our son.
Apparently at nursery he activly encouraged and initated play with other children and staff.
He took turns and joined in with everything going on.When I asked why he is so unresponsive and withdrawn at home he said it was probably his personality.Aparently his personality is to blame for everything I mentioned including his sleep problems.He thinks he may shut down at home because he is so busy and involved at nursery.
The only postive thing I can take from this is that he was really impressed with nursery and said that ds2 is well liked by the staff and children.
Where we go from here I don't know the man who has seen ds2 is only training and is moving on to his next placement so i may ask for some one else who is qualified to assess him.We are due to see his consultant in 2 weeks so will take it from there.

OP posts:

coppertop · 09/03/2005 12:25

I think at the very least you are entitled to have a fully qualified person carrying out the observations!

Sometimes a person has to really know what they are looking for to see past the more superficial side of things. When ds2 is at his toddler group he hands people toys. To a casual observer this looks great and shows that he is initiating play. If you look a little closer you will see that ds2 doesn't attempt to interact with the person or share the toy with them. He dumps it and trots off elsewhere.

Ds2 is very popular with a lot of adults and children. He is quite distinctive looking and has a very cheeky little face. This seems to attract people to him. Popularity doesn't necessarily mean that a child has no SN.

I don't see how they can blame everything on his personality. It doesn't sound particularly logical to me.

Original poster

meea · 09/03/2005 12:45

The difficult thing is that people see different things in the same behaviour.One of my closest friends is a teacher and more recently a manager of a nursery.She sees ds2 regulary and when we discussed his problems she commented that she had never seen him activly seek anyones attention apart from me.She said that while he responds to his siblings he never initiates play with them.
I also think that being the youngest of 4 a lot of his behaviour and play is copied or learnt.
I have to be honest and say that he did't instill me with confidence hen we visited him at the cdc when he asked me if I could teach him not to wake us up and play with his toys (he is nearly 3).
Please tell me is it normal for a child of his age to sit in his puhchair for 2 hours with out speaking asking to get out or even play with a toy.
Is it normal for him to get distressed because someone stood infront of the bin in the school yard that he wanted to be able to see.
People say to me all the time isn't he good but can't they be to good.
He also has this thing about skin contact he has to have hold of my skin when ever he is near me very embarrasing when he puts his hands in my jeans in public.
Sorry this is so long.

OP posts:

coppertop · 09/03/2005 13:30

Would your friend be able to write a statement for you to use as extra evidence? As someone who works with children and who has seen your ds more often than the Clin Psych she could be a valuable 'witness'.

For me, alarm bells would be ringing if I had a 3yr-old who was happy to sit in a pushchair for hours etc. Presumably the Psych put this down to personality too?

JakB · 09/03/2005 13:42

So sorry you're going through such a tough time, Meea. Am sorting dd out but will be back on later to give my support

Original poster

meea · 09/03/2005 13:43

That's a really good idea i'm going out with her on Friday so I will ask her.
It would be good to take it with us to the appointment with the consultant.
The psych did put it down to is peronality.To be honest I was that amazed at his report that I forgot to question him about lots of issues.
I am going to start writing a list of concerns and questions for his consultant.We could be there for a long time.

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