2 children families

[carbiee]

Hello, not sure exactly what it is I am looking for here, maybe some support or stories?

DC1 is suspected ASD (undiagnosed but ongoing discussions with preschool and HV)
We know we would love another little one to love and it's not a question of if, more of "when".

I've always imagined being able to tell DC they will be a big sibling and a baby is on the way but as they are non verbal and little understanding this is unfortunately not looking like a likely scenario unless we go for a bigger age gap.

Has anyone ever found that having another benefits the first? How do you make time for a newborn and the needs of DC1?

Open to hearing all the good and bad

DD2 was a couple of weeks old when we realised DD1 may be autistic. When she was first born, DD1 showed some interest in her little sister but not as much as you would ‘typically’ expect.

Within a few months this lessened and at times she struggled but they have their own unique relationship and over time this is changing.

DD2 adores DD1 and I know DD1 loves her little sister even if she doesn’t show it in they way we’d expect. DD1 is learning how to share space with her sister and getting used to being around an unpredictable toddler.

The early days were hard, as they would be for anyone going from 1-2. But you get through it and it feels like time has flown past. They’re now nearly 3.5 and 1.5 and have some really sweet moments- the other day DD2 was trying to wipe her big sister’s nose.

5yr gap between mine. NGL… extremely hard work. Both autistic & adhd. They are violent towards each other but bond over the dog and sometimes, when one is in meltdown they can only come out of it if the other intervenes and (usually) pretends to be a dog. It’s a weird and wonderful household