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Stim or copying brother?

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ThePhoenixAndTheAshes · 08/09/2020 00:51

I have 3 boys, eldest has anxiety. Maybe Autistic, but masks really well so no diagnosis besides the Anxiety. Regular meltdowns from it and school refusal. 6 year old is Autistic, has sensory processing issues and developmental delays. Paediatrican thinks probably Adhd and/or Anxiety as well.

Youngest is 4, I haven't noticed any red flags for ASD so far. Except in the last 6 months he's started flapping his hands a lot. His 6 year old brother does hand flapping a little but his main stim is hands clasped and buzzing. I can't work out if DS3 is just copying his brother or if it's a stim. And if it is a stim does that mean he's Autistic or are stims part of other diagnostic criteria?

I have a chronic illness and am really unwell, failing marriage, kids dad isn't really involved in any of this. I'm feeling really overwhelmed and no idea where to start with DS3 if this is something I need to follow up? Would love any advice, experiences, thoughts on this.

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