Primary school auties: summer and beyond - thread 5

[openupmyeagereyes]

This is the continuation of the thread for parents and carers of autistic children in Early Years and KS1. Most of us are parents of children in Reception or Year 1, but all welcome!

Here are the links to the previous threads:

Thread 1: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3080753-DS-with-ASD-starting-school-Sept-2018-I-am-feeling-overwhelmed

Thread 2: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3451020-Reception-auties-2018-19-thread-2

Thread 3: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3628263-Auties-transition-to-Year-1-thread-3

Thread 4
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/special_needs/3748449-Primary-school-Auties-into-2020-thread-4

@openupmyeagereyes

The school are adamant they aren't having him. The LA have a meeting with them Wednesday and said they will be issuing the final plan naming that school afterwards so I'm not entirely sure if that means the school are being told tough or not.

The whole written statement is shocking, I don't want him there other than as a FU when DS proves them wrong

I’ve managed to get an ipsea call back tomorrow, dh will be home so he can sort ds whilst I talk.

I always check and every block is grey and booked out, finally managed to find a green!

Well done danni, it shouldn’t be so hard.

mum I hope you get your preferred outcome.

www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/brighter-beginnings-managing-your-childs-sleep-tickets-135058935913

That’s a free online sleep course on Tuesday 26th 10am-12 noon with contact a family, if you register they send you an invite, it’s all done via zoom.

I can’t do it unfortunately as I have to pick ds up during that time.

But may be helpful.

www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/brighter-beginnings-encouraging-positive-behaviour-tickets-135059268909

Another one, 27th jan 10-12noon encouraging positive behaviour for children with additional needs.

Easier to just post this link to contact a family website all the online courses are on this link.

They do quite a few.

contact.org.uk/family-workshops

Thanks @danni0509
Well done on the ipsea appointment!

Sunshine Support run lots of online events too.

Totally agree the Contact workshops are amazing

Ipsea booked to phone at 11am and no one called!

Oh no danni

I sent an email. Never heard anything.

It’s annoying because I had taken ds to the park first thing to wear him out, got him home and on his iPad for ten to 11, all planned to presicion so I could talk with out interference, I wrote a list of questions etc.

Then no one called me 🙄

Sendiass always does the same thing never phones when she says she’s going too! I book time slots with people as it’s difficult to speak with ds it’s difficult to think never mind hold a conversation. Annoying when people don’t stick to what they say.

Hopefully they will fit you in as a priority. I agree, it’s very frustrating when people don’t follow through. Even just a message or quick call if something has come up.

Oh thats really frustrating @danni0509!

I accidently entered down a wormhole of very unhappy parents at my DD's school.

@Mumofsend unhappy parents of sn children or unhappy parents due to lockdown?

@Onceuponatimethen unhappy parents of SN children. Everyone saying the same thing that the school absolutely can't stand or cope with any form of behavioural need

@Mumofsend it may help to hear you aren’t alone? But so crap that all our kids are being let down

@Mumofsend I’ve mentioned on here before but you didnt post back then, ds school is 3 classes to a year, they have 3 sn kids in ds year, one child in each class, so ds and 2 other boys, there is ds with autism amongst other things, another boy with autism and 1 with development delays all 3 have ehcp’, ds is by far the hardest work for his school, the other 2 boys had 1-1 in reception and part of year 1 but they don’t have 1-1 now they just do small group work and seem to be getting on really well now although their issues are less severe than ds’.

The boy with the development delays has made the most progress (he’s lovely and so sweet! His first word was ds name he also used to call me mummy! He could never understand how I was ds mummy and not mummy to him) he was on the class assemblies posted to tapestry last week doing times tables and adding really big numbers together with a marker pen on the class table etc he only started saying single words late in reception. I was quite shocked to see that last week.

Anyway I’m getting side tracked, sorry!

But right from reception they started all 3 SN kids part time (although the other 2 quickly moved to full time) they used to make them all play outside and the teaching assistants all used to call them the three musketeers.

So from day 1 all the sn kids grouped together chucked outside together away from the other children etc.

Then I also mentioned on here that one day when ds was in year 1, I was getting him from the office (where I always get him from) and I see a mum picking a reception child up ‘early’ so I started talking to her as I could see her son had some kind of SN so I knew what they were doing to that family too, sending him home early and just as I thought they were doing the exact same to him too.

I spoke to her September time and she was having to collect him at 1pm, they had increased it from 12..

Another mum I know who’s son is NT said she’s moving her son as the school isn’t as cracked up to be as she thought, it’s always been oversubscribed but if you go on their website it says they have places and to phone for more information.

Ds school doesn’t even have a senco anymore, long story (!) the head is acting as senco and she said she hasn’t been a senco for 20 years (and she’s the prime discriminator!) bad bad recipe.

I haven’t mentioned for a while but ds is doing really great with his toileting, I can count on one hand how many accidents he’s had in the past couple of months. He’s able to go 2-3 hours without the toilet now and I’m not even taking spare clothes out anymore as he’s more reliable, he even tells me a lot of the time he needs a wee, although I still have to take him and stand with him as he does crazy shit like drinks hand soap or climbs into the u bend etc 😂 but he’s getting on great recently! (only took nearly 2 years to get to this point!)

He’s still wearing a pamper pull up for bed, they are getting too small now (he’s in a size 7) so I’m thinking about over the next few weeks taking that away,

any tips?

@danni0509 sounds really similar to DD's.

Really good to hear about the boys with delays making most progress. ASD has been mentioned for DS but instinct is saying no. I'm so upset they have assumed he will be challenging because he has delays.

My DD has 4 EHCPs in her year. Two are DD and another boy who is equally hard work. Somehow in the same class whoever bright idea that was. The other two are no bother, their mums rave about the school. The boy similar to DD has had an even worse tome than she has from the school. At least DD already had a diagnosis, they kept telling his mum he was just yet another 4 year old whose parents hadn't taught him to behave.

Its shocking

I couldn’t trust ds to use the bathroom in the night though (can’t do that in the day) so he would need a potty or something in his room overnight? Don’t trust him not to drink it or something gross like that though!

danni ds is still in pull ups at night. We use drynites and they do an 8-15 size though we’re just about in 4-7. Ds can be dry and is often but just isn’t reliable and will have periods where he’s wet every day. We think he goes when he wakes up and just too lazy to go to the toilet but who knows. He’s been talking about wearing pants at night so I’m hoping it will soon click for him. It would be so nice to be done with it.

Great that your ds is doing better though

mum yes, nice to have some support but a shame for all your families.

We’ve had a lazy weekend. We had a smattering of snow yesterday so were able to have a snowball fight but today was dreary. Back to home school tomorrow and it’s my turn to get up early!

Great news on the toileting front Danni. DS is still unreliable. He hasn't had an accident at school since October so that's good. But last Monday he had 3 accidents at home. He is still wet every night. We use the same Drynites as Open - although he is 7.5 he is 5-6 yrs clothes size. The paediatrician has referred him to the continence team.

Great news @danni0509! I find it's up and down with DS, depends on if he has sensory overload or not, if he's tired etc. Sometimes it's on purpose to gauge a reaction so I have to pretend it's an accident! I do think it's appalling how your DS' school are treating him and I really hope you can move him soon, then start legal proceedings against them. These people have obviously had no personal experience of sen, it's awful. Same to @Mumofsend too, terrible.
We did find out earlier that DS has been granted 1 to 1 funding, so that was nice, although no update on special school.