Autism signs & advice 23 months

[Newmomma2705]

Hi
Just looking for a bit of help and advice really. My DD will be 23 months this week and is showing some traits of autism. She has already had a referral to a peadeatrician from the health visitor after expressing my concerns however due to the current pandemic nay not be seen for a long time due to back log. She has had a hearing test which was inconclusive however I don't believe there is a problem with hearing. She has had a referral to SALT however same situation she won't be seen until everything open again.
I am extremely worried about autism although I know it's not the end of the world and am actually a Peadeatric nurse so have met many autistic children it's hard to deal with it being your own and not something you expected. I am not sleeping at night I feel like I assess everything that she does and I love her to absolute pieces and dony let her see my worry it's always on my mind and I feel like this is taking her being a toddler away from me.

My concerns are-

• only responds to her name occasionally
• No real words at all, babbles constantly. (Hasn't lost words just has never said any yet)
• doesn't point at all. She reaches or looks at what she wants and looks back at us or just cries looking at the object (of pulls on our clothes and pushes us to whatever she wants)
• her attention isn't great. She does give eye contact and keeps it if it's something she's interested in (nursery rhymes/ animal sounds/ hide and seek)
• not interested in people or childre

Other info-
No sensory issues enjoys messy play, not bothered about loud noises etc
Doesn't hand flap, spin or any of the other stimming behaviours (that I've noticed)
Eats well will try new things & no sleep issues
Attend nursery and there only concern at the moment is her attention.
She loves books but doesn't point things out
She enjoys playing with her stackers, building blocks, shape sorters. This week she has copied us sweeping with her broom, started pouring cups of tea and putting dolly down the slide and laughing but no more pretend play as such.

I don't really know what I'm looking for maybe just signs your little ones has autism? Could this just be a language / communication thing or is that not a thing? Thanks x

Hi!
Join the club of worrying parents. Dad of a 3.3yr old DS who is also yet to start communicating. We thought it was just a language delay but after we've seen the NHS Paediatrician back in Feb, her preliminary diagnosis is that he is likely on the ASD. I've been doing so much googling and what I understand is that symptoms overlap, so its not always to diagnose. The ped was more focus on the fact that he didn't have shared attention and behaved in his own terms.

I've read that language delay/disorder (both receptive and therefore expressive) leads to no pointing/gestures, no pretend/imaginary play, poor eye contact and appear to be in own world, walk on tiptoes, will do hand leading, and will also have restrictive play (play with car wheels or alike).

Equally Autism has the same symptoms, come with language delay but highly likely to come with sensory processing issues (don't like light, sound and touch), with sleep issues, eating issues and motor control issues, and will do hand leading. But Autism is also likely to come with severe tantrums from problem with routine/situation change, and also restrictive and repetitive play patterns (play with car wheels only and hand flapping or alike).

Then there's also Global Development Delay which is delay in 2 or more areas such as language and Motor, both severe language delay/disorder and Autism fits GDD!

So shared attention is key from my research, which is linked with the development of Theory of Mind which person with ASD may have limited of or at all. SHared attention is like if your DC points to a dog then looks at you, or a plane in the sky and looks at you.

Thank you so much for the info @Harmos, really useful. My DD sounds more like a language delay although has actually started pointing a few times today! Such a worry with everything and with all going on and not knowing about appointments is a worry. Thank you and hope your DS starts communicating soon.

Whilst you waiting for salt it would be really useful to do some research into pecs and makaton. This is what salt will suggest that you try either pecs or makaton to get communication started. There are other methods but these are the nhs salt defaults.

Thanks for the help I have read up on those but was sure if in UK but that's useful to know that's what they will use so I will look more into it.

My understanding is that parents will only be successful with makaton or pecs if the child has developed enough receptive language, otherwise how would they understand? Would be great if someone can clear this up.

You could have described my dd at 23 months OP! Except the eating, she’s still a fussy wee bugger!

We’re 7 months down the line from you. We had an SLT appt when she was 2yrs 2months and the therapist did agree that she had some asd traits. Our trust will only do a formal assessment at 2.5 years, which was supposed to be at the start of this month, but it’s been postponed due to CV19.

I’m trying to remain chill about things. Thankfully, dd is v easy going, no meltdowns, sleeps well and is happy to do as she’s told when she understands. Her attempts at communicating have really come along recently- we now have “No!”, “Go away!” and “I don’t wanna!” as well as as hi, bye, baby and cuddle.

The other day I asked her “Dd is it time for bed?” and she shouted No! It was the first time she’d actually responded to a question 😂.

I found getting on to the SLT and getting her in the system has really helped my worrying. It means that we’ve done everything as early as possible to get her help and with how important early intervention is, it’s made me feel a bit more in control.

I’ve also reached out to two old colleagues who have dc with asd. Tbh that’s been a MASSIVE help. Both their kids are flying in mainstream. Not just surviving, but thriving. I also spoke to fellow mindee from my old childminder- I grew up with her. She went from being non-verbal, no babbling, to a special school, then mainstream secondary and on to university where she got a masters. She works full time and picks and chooses who she tells about her asd.

Try and remember the things she is doing. I’m guilty of forgetting the stuff dd is fantastic at and it can cause me to spiral a bit. If she’s doing some pretend play, brilliant! If she’s babbling, that’s great, she knows that vocalising is how people communicate. A great sleeper, good eater etc, these are all brilliant things which give a good indication that she’s going to be fine, with or without asd.

Hi there,
I was you, 2 years ago. It’s a long road.
My ds ( I have 4 other children) never babbled. He also never really began speaking for a long time. I waved my flag, but to no avail. Health visitors were great but SALT were terrible in my experience (although in other areas they can be superb) Even though my ds could only say one word at 2.5, they declined our referral. My son also had no interest at all in anything outside our house. He practically drank milk continually, enough to give him severe iron deficiency. Of course we’d been to Gp ref milk intake but he appeared tall, sticky and full of energy.
My ds also had good eye contact but only at home with his family members. From the age of 2, it began to become more noticeable (ASD). The waiting list for SALT is months.
The turning point for me was once my ds started nursery. His nursery teacher is superb. They are trained to look out for certain things which together can be indicative of a condition. My ds does not flap. He rarely has melt downs and his hearing and name response is superb. However, now that his speech is developing, his voice has a funny accent and a lot of his speech is phrases his learnt sort of robotically.
The nursery have referred him for an ASD assessment. Pre 5, the waiting list is shorter. However, it still takes about 12-18 months.
In the end, I paid for a private assessment to be done. Only because my ds was finding nursery stressful and as he’s approaching full time hours I wanted to get his EHCP in place to suit my sons needs. I will still go ahead and have his NHS ASD assessment done too.

Hang in there. You’re not alone. The more I learn, the more interested I become. I have 5 children. My other 4 are all neurotypical but yet all different.
Trust your instincts. The worst thing that can happen is that you are told that you were worrying over nothing and that your child is just a later bloomer. The spectrum is so vast, and it’s not always easy to tell. I learned traits about my son I’d never noticed before because of scaffolding parenting. I’d never noticed my son didn’t know how to play typically with toys. I’d always played with him but had done all the work so to speak. My ds lives screen time. A lot of ASD people do, so I’m now looking at how I can get this to work as a learning tool.
Don’t be afraid to keep pushing. The sooner you get support, the better for you both.
Understanding of ASD has come along way, so be careful which books you read.

Harmos

No that's not true. You obviously use speech when using pecs or makaton but the main purpose is to support that speech with either a sign (makaton) or an image (pecs). A child does not have to understand the verbal word to connect a sign or image to an object.

Encourage communication in any way the child can access and hopefully speech/receptive language skills will come later as you are supporting it with the alternative communication method. Using an alternative communication method whether that be pecs, makaton, podd or speech apps will not stop language development. Research has shown that it actively encourages and supports it. Hope that helps.

Can I recommend the ‘More than Words’ book by Hanen? I’ll see if I can find a link. It was recommended by DS’s SALT and the outstanding special pre school he went to used its techniques.

It’s £33 from here, which seems like a lot but it was my bible for a good few years.

www.winslowresources.com/more-than-words-from-hanen-book.html

Wow, it’s £70 on Amazon. It’s a few years old now but the techniques don’t age. It’s aimed specifically under 5s with ASD, but the techniques of encouraging communication and interaction would be suitable with any child with those difficulties.

Hi Op, that sounds very similar to my third child. He had a huge speech delay, no pointing, gestures etc.

He began to speak at around 3.5 yrs (non verbal til then, we used Pecs as he was so visual). He went from strength to strength once he began to talk. Asd was always a concern in the early years, but like your child he never ticked all the boxes.

After a mixed journey through primary school, he was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 11. He's now 17, on medication and doing really well. Speech delay is one of the markers for ADHD.

If you really don’t think there are any signs of ASD there is a similar book called ‘It takes Two to Talk’ which is the Hanen speech and language approach for young children without autism.

www.winslowresources.com/it-takes-two-to-talk-from-hanen-book.html

It’s £44

Thank you every one so much for your comments and help! She actually started to point request yesterday and now is doing it constantly in a day! Obviously still worried but mad how quickly they change. Thanks

@Newmomma2705

Hi, I am so happy that she is making progress. Nobody would wish Autism on their worst enemy, even though the Autistic community says that Autism is just a different way of seeing the world, we all want our children to be normal from the start and not have any difficulty facing the world (no offence intended). Plus with Autism you don't ever know what the future looks like. There's a youtube channel called Autism Dad where a very brave dad videos her severely autistic little girl, it breaks my heart.

Just observe how she is pointing, as its the quality of pointing that is key here. So long that she is pointing and then looking at you to confirm that she is sharing that attention with you, then that's good progress. The reason I say is because a child can be taught to point, and all he/she will do is just point at what she want without sharing that attention with you.

@Pomegranatemolasses

Hi, please help me with more info, what did you observe to confirm your LO did not fit ASD? I have a 3.3yr old who is yet to start communicating. We are understandably very concerned.

Thank you @harmos yes joint/ shared attention is what I'm trying to figure out if she does. When she's pointing she's turning to us moaning a little bit. Also when she plays with her toys such as stacking a tower she will bring her blocks to me stack infront of me and when she is built it she looks at me smiling waiting for a response, is that kind of like joint attention? Not quite sure as read alot of contradicting information! Just wish we could meet the speech and language therapist for some advice/ help. Thanks.

Hi, yes absolutely that shared attention.

Have you looked at the mchat questionnaire for toddlers? It might reassure you or persuade you to seek further assessment. It’s for children between 16 and 30 months old.

www.autismspeaks.org/screen-your-child

There are other sources for mchat out there, this was just the first that came up.

The good thing about the Hanen books is that they give you lots of activities to work on with your child while you are waiting for a referral or appointment. Sadly it can take months in some areas.

Thank you I am looking into the hanen books and have very positive reviews so think I will purchase one of these whilst waiting. Thanks for the advice I will look on the m chat however has already been referred to the peadeatrician to review.

Sorry, yes, I’ve reread your original post. I’m glad you have a referral already. The earlier you can start interventions the better. Good luck.

My boy with ASD is 20 now and leaving education soon. He’s done very well considering, has 10 GCSEs and is doing a college course in computing. If I’d had a crystal ball when he was 2 I’d have been a lot less worried.

Harmos, I don't think it's ok to dismiss actually autistic people when they tell you that they wouldn't lose their autism.

I haven't seen this youtuber but I don't think anyone should record meltdowns and broadcast them. Imagine if your worst childhood moments were on the internet to follow you your whole life? It's a huge breach of trust.

@Harmos, sorry I just saw this. It's hard to remember all the details now, but some of the things that didn't chime with autism were: no food issues, interested in other children, no problem with changes in routine etc.

Looking back now, he also had lots of traits which could be seen as signs of autism!

@Pomegranatemolasses

Hi, thank you for coming back, and appreciate it was many moons ago for you, glad your DC is doing well.
Please help, hope you can remember, did your DC have shared/joint attention before his language caught up at 3.5yrs? How was his response to name during that time? Was he like in his own world?

@Pomegranatemolasses it's great to hear that as I do read alot of children under 2 show traits. And although my DD does show traits I feel at the moment like they fit into just a communication and wonder myself if this may change as she develops speech.