Auties transition to Year 1 - thread 3

[LightTripper]

This is the continuation of the thread for parents and carers of autistic children in reception year at school, going into Year 1 in the autumn. All welcome (also parents with older or younger children who want to ask questions or share their wisdom!)

Welcome!

I just wanted to post this! Light I've taken this on my elephant bedding especially for you

We have a lanyard too!

Dimples is your ds more affected by his autism than your nephews? Where your nephews similar to ds at his age? Sorry you had another shit day!

Sorry don't know what the hell happened just then.

I got lanyard happy and posted it again

It's a bloody good job I didn't accidentally post the before my diet knicker and bra photos I got Dh to take yesterday you would of never of seen me again!

We use the lanyard at the airport by the way. I actually welcome the special treatment it gets us since I dont cope very well with ds in public

Danni DS and his cousins all have different needs (my DS is adopted).

Eldest DN has rare chromosone deletion, diagnosed with DCD and has specific learning difficulties in literacy and numeracy
Twin cousins are auties
DS's primary 'diagnosis' is global developmental delay. I have asked repeatedly for DS to be assessed for ASD ('he's too sociable') and ADHD ('let's see if he settles down').

The thing is that DS has full time 1:1 and is making the most progress and is the happiest of the four. Eldest DN is definitely the biggest worry to us as he is v.low, on the brink of school refusal and is not getting the support identified on SEN plan. Think things are going to get v awkward with the school....

Glad to hear that the lanyard worked

dimples your poor dn, no wonder you are all worried. Hopefully the extra funding will make a difference. Do you know yet how they plan to spend it?

Giving funding for a 1:3 group in theory might make sense but unless there are two other dc in the class with similar issues and with the same level of funding how is it doable?

danni I’m relieved we didn’t get the underwear shot! Tesco were also supposed to be trialling the sunflower lanyard but I don’t know what came of it.

liv I hope your ds copes with his TA change. Ds has a new TA in the afternoons as his previous one resigned. Thankfully ds has been fine with it as she had already been in the class a few weeks. She has a 21yo ds with asd and has worked in a SS so it’s a good fit and I’m sure it’s why she was hired.

Ds asked to do his spelling again yesterday and got 9/10. I need to input the next group of words I think. I’m sure it will only last a week and then he’ll refuse to use it but you never know.

I’m full of cold here. Ds does not have it yet (we usually get them from him!) but presumably it’s only a matter of time...

It makes me so frustrated dimples - now I understand how much of a huge difference some smallish adjustments in setting can make. It's really not that hard to give our DC an environment where they can thrive, and costs much more not to. But it's like so many things: the costs of accommodating come out of this year's budget, and the costs of not accommodating are somebody else's problem later. What a world.

DC are both poorly so I'm back to not great sleep yawn. But half term starts this weekend for us (everybody else too?) and I think DD really needs the break, so that's good. I am also a good way towards eating a particularly slimy frog at work, so starting to feel like there may be light at the end of the tunnel....

And thanks for the elephants danni
I must grab a couple of lanyards. Good to have the option.

I also got told by somebody I only got online that they think I might be autistic (in context - not in a nasty way!) which brought me up a bit short.... didn't think it was that obvious! I am wondering if I should find out properly. I can't remember, do any of you think you (or your other halves) may be autistic too?

Sorry, only know online!

@LightTripper My DH was referred via GP to adult autism service. In his case it was worth doing as symptoms and impact were detrimental and mental health was worsening rapidly. The whole assessment process took about a year, several appointments with multi disciplinary team. It was chance comment from a crisis team member that I spoke to about him that made the ASD appear on the radar. Online sources, reliable ones like the Barron-Cohen questionnaires, are appropriate and reliable for indicating whether or not you may be on the AS. Whether you want a “formal” diagnosis or not, perhaps it is worth doing. My DH is gaining confidence with DD now as he sees behaviour and mannerisms (and fears) that he had as a child. It’s reaffirming to him, I think, that he’s not weird or an alien (his words!). I think, too, that if DD is diagnosed it may be a comfort perhaps to her later on to see she’s not alone...If I were you, consider what impact your possible symptoms have on you, your family, your mental well-being...if there’s even a chance you may feel more ‘at home’ with yourself after formal diagnosis it is worth a shot. Just my opinion based on seeing difference in DH.

Apparently ds got upset yesterday morning and hit his TA

Swings & roundabouts

Light dh and I both have traits I think and I can see them in other members of my family too (female presentation).

For me, though I can see these traits, it’s not been a lightbulb moment like it can be for some. I’m a bit awkward socially and suffer from low level anxiety on and off but so do many NTs. I don’t think a diagnosis would change anything for me so on that basis I wouldn’t seek one.

Do you think you will?

Danni love the elephant bedding! Glad lanyard is being helpful.

We got two lanyards, one from London Luton Airport (who have on numerous occasions excellent at helping DD by the way) as well as a Sainsbury's one. Great initiative!

Sorry things are tough dimples, your DS having a 1:1 and making such good progress just goes to show how the right support can make such a difference. Hope you and your sister can get a chance to gather your strength this weekend to tackle the next step on the journey for support.

light hope your DC's feel better so they can enjoy the half-term break (we have another week to go).

I think I'm autistic, probably DH too. And my dad, who lives in a house full of miniature steam locomotives (can he be more stereotypically ASD?!? He's just sent over a load via FedEx for DD too!) It would certainly explain my whole childhood and life My two oldest and best friends back in Sweden are both neuro diverse, one got an ADD diagnosis at age 38, other one I've known since tiny and she was a selective mute at school (except with me) so I think I've surrounded myself with fellow auties my whole life.

This messages will be continued as I keep losing text when typing for too long...

Liv sorry your DS is having a change of TAs, hope he settles ok with new arrangement. I didn't realise Argos did lanyards too! That is great.

Open sounds like your DS is doing week with the spellings. Could the change in TA have caused him upset so he hit her? Maybe it's end of term tiredness. Is he off next week or the week after? I'm awkward too and definitely suffer with anxiety, although not so low level.

Furry sounds like your DD is in a lovely environment at the moment (in response to your earlier entry about her school). What a journey your DH has been through to get his diagnosis but great that it's helping him understand himself, and appreciate himself for what he is. And helpful for understanding your DD too. I think you hit the nail on the head with the consideration of how it affects everyday life, family, mental health etc. I am considering going for an assessment but just not sure I have the strength for it right now.

DD's Halloween party is tonight, I'm going with her. She wants to go as Twilight Sparkle or Elsa from Frozen... Nothing spooky

Little I read a quote from an autistic person that said not all autistics are trainspotters but all trainspotters are probably autistic. I don’t know if it’s true but it sounds like it could be!

I hope the party goes well. Is twilight sparkle a my little pony?

I don’t think the hitting was due to a change in TA’s. It’s happened maybe 3 or 4 times since he started school. Hopefully it wasn’t repeated today and the break will do him good. I worry when this happens because the TAs are so lovely with him and I don’t want them to dislike him.

open years ago I did some supply teaching in SN schools and no one I worked with ever took it personally when a child lashed out. Your DS sounds like a lovely boy, can't imagine that the TAs would be put off by an action that he really can't help. DD hits too but mostly me so far. Or the walls/toys whatever is in reach.

at the trainspotting saying!

Twilight Sparkle is indeed a My Little Pony!

Thanks Little, that’s reassuring.

Great that the lanyard is already working for you danni!

Great about the spellings open. Sorry about him hitting the TA. Hopefully he can have a nice break over half term.

We're on half term today too light. Actually really relieved to have a break from school runs.

Me and dh both definitely have traits but I don't think either of us are autistic. We do have a lot of autism in the family though, I have two cousins and an uncle and dh's father realised he was through the process of diagnosing ds. Also most of our other family members have other co morbid things like hyper mobility, anxiety, mental health issues.

It sounds like getting a diagnosis for DH was a really good thing furry.

Hope the Halloween party went well littleswede what did she go as in the end?

liv he hit her again yesterday. I’m very glad it’s now half term. He doesn’t hurt us when he hits, which is very rare, as it’s more like open handed pushing so hopefully that was the case here too though it’s unacceptable obviously. I emailed the SENco and teacher about it though I don’t expect them to pick it up until after the break.

So DD went as Twilight Sparkle in the end. When we got in she was immediately grabbed by a little girl from her class and they danced about for a good while. The music way way too loud though, the room was very dark and there was an entertainer too which meant that after around 40 minutes (which included a break with drinks and snacks in a quiet lit up room) she'd had enough and asked to go home. She had a great time though that's all that matters. She wants a disco party 'for Easter' now

@livpotter sorry your ds is having a change of ta's hopefully it will go well.

@openupmyeagereyes great how well your ds is doing with spellings. So sorry he hit the TA twice. I hope the half term gives him a rest and he feel better after.

@FurryCat1978 me and dh both have a diagnosis of autism and we also have a 15 year old with a autism diagnosis i think genetics has a big part to play for us. Me and Dh were both diagnosed as adults and we were asked by ds's pediatrician to go though the assessments as they could see traits we have.

@LittleSwede So glad that dd went to the halloween disco and fun.

Ds went back to school wednesday by friday ds was no longer making any attempts at going to the toilet and was with holding poo and just had leakage in his boxes. He was also wetting. He is very constipated not eaten properly since Thursday and is have tummy pains. His tummy is also very noisey. I phone his incontinence nurse department yesterday as ds nurse doesn't work friday for some advice but no one called me back.
Friday school called at 1.20 for more clothes then phoned again at 2.35 to say that that he had soiled one set and the other he had left on the bathroom floor and were wet though that he was clean but had no underwear on but had trosuers on that it was only 30 minutes till end of day and he was going in assembly that if i really wanted him in underwear i would have to take some very quickly. I said well best hope he doesn't have another accident. From looking at ds commincation book am not sure if they are trying toilet with him as it says tried toilet at 9.30 am and then test of day just say if he was clean or dirty at change times.
We have tried to go asda today to spend his birthday money and he wet 4 times in 1 hour and 15 minutes we ended up having to buy clothes. Looks like we are stuck in till i can get it under control but i will get him back on track then back to school where it all goes to pot.
Also ds commincation book came home on thursday with notes in about other children. They don't write about ds just a basic 9.30 toilet 10.30 wet ect. So was shocked to find these notes very serious ones as well.