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Auties transition to Year 1 - thread 3

999 replies

LightTripper · 03/07/2019 11:10

This is the continuation of the thread for parents and carers of autistic children in reception year at school, going into Year 1 in the autumn. All welcome (also parents with older or younger children who want to ask questions or share their wisdom!)

Welcome!

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Harleyisme · 11/10/2019 14:54

I wonder if anyone here could help me try figure out these comments ds made. He siad mummy i am nervous i asked why he said because girl had come to play and Mrs Teacher said that girl isn't my girlfriend me and girl are common and common is a bisexual ( what the last word sounds like although i am sure hes trying ti say another word). I am getting the impression that ds thinks hes no longer allowed to play with this girl but has totally misunderstood the conversation but am struggle to work out what the conversation actually ment in the first place.

LightTripper · 11/10/2019 15:06

Hmmmm... sounds confusing (and like DS is confused!) This is where a communication book with school would be useful... Hmm

Maybe you can use it as an example at your meeting?

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Harleyisme · 11/10/2019 15:35

I think so to. I will be using it. This is ds's best friend who has been brilliant with him since they started in reception class even when ds is fuatrated and moody the amount of understanding and acceptance is wonderful. I don't want ds thinking he isn't allowed to be her friend.

openupmyeagereyes · 11/10/2019 17:12

Harley I’ve no clue, I think you need to ask the teacher.

Regarding a communication book. I think all you can reasonably expect is a few notes on highs and lows of the day and any major issues or queries either way. They really won’t have the time for a lot of detail. This may not have been included as the teacher wouldn’t necessarily know that your ds has misunderstood the situation (whatever it was).

openupmyeagereyes · 11/10/2019 17:14

Lottie I would make a list of these sorts of thing and raise them at parents evening if that’s soon. If not then try to arrange a quick catch up with the teacher to discuss.

openupmyeagereyes · 11/10/2019 17:29

danni don’t feel bad about feeling embarrassed. I have felt embarrassed many times because I’m naturally quite introverted and hate everyone looking at me. I have definitely developed a thicker skin over the last few years but I’m definitely not at that don’t-give-a-toss stage yet.

I do think it’s bad that the teacher did not come out to see you. Do you have parents’ evening soon? In lieu of parents’ evening I’ve asked for a meeting with the teacher and SENco half way through each term to discuss how he’s doing against his EHCP targets so we can make adjustments if necessary. You could ask for this too?

danni0509 · 11/10/2019 18:07

That's it open, ds is very behind socially and emotionally.

no good the salt saying he's at at a 4.5 yr old level with speech if he's at toddler level with the social communication / interaction. Because his good vocab isn't being used anywhere near to it's potential because of all the barriers of the Asd iyswim.

I'll take what she's says with a pinch of salt anyway, she sees him for 20 minutes every 4/6 months. Her inputs not that important, she only gives a few sheets to the school to work on and is on her way. I can print the same sort of sheets off myself. He doesn't receive any actual direct therapy from her.

His vocabulary might be at a 4-5 year old but if she writes that in her report I won't mind that so long as she adds the important bit in that his communication / social understanding is at a much lower level. Therefore massively hinders his speech and language.

The senco said at his annual review that he is a typical autism presentation. He's behind academically (literacy and maths) but only by about 12 months at the moment so not too much of a concern. But all things social related he's approx 3 years behind. So operating roughly at a 3 year level at nearly 6. Big difference between academically and socially! Which is usually par for the course with Asd.

So much of every day life is social related too this is why asd children have so many issues. I thought social skills meant basically having and making friends, then when I started my research a few years ago with ds I realised social skills include all the rules / socially acceptable behaviours and hell of a lot more complicated stuff.

danni0509 · 11/10/2019 18:09

I don't half waffle on! Hope that post makes sense, it always does to me Grin

Open we have parents evening next week.

Jeb86 · 11/10/2019 19:15

It’s a boy!! Just home from hospital after a planned c-section. In mega amounts of pain at the moment, will no doubt have time in the middle of the night to catch up on everything from the last couple of days :)

danni0509 · 11/10/2019 19:28

Congrats jeb ThanksThanksThanksThanks

dimples76 · 11/10/2019 19:30

Congratulations Jeb. Hope that the pain eases soon. How has DS taken to the role of big brother?

LightTripper · 11/10/2019 19:35

Congratulations Jeb!! Sorry about the pain ... can they give you anything? Hope it subsides soon! Is he amazingly gorgeous? Please give him an extra squidge from us!

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openupmyeagereyes · 11/10/2019 20:02

Many congratulations Jeb, wonderful news Smile Flowers

Paracetamol and ibuprofen together at regular intervals!

openupmyeagereyes · 11/10/2019 20:08

can they give you anything?

They didn’t send me home with anything, you have to buy your own Hmm

Harleyisme · 11/10/2019 20:09

Congrats @Jeb86 hope all the pain goes away soon and you heal quickly.

Today is the first day ever that ds hasn't had any sort of poo accident at all. All poo in the toilet!!! I couldn't be any prouder!!!

Harleyisme · 11/10/2019 20:10

@openupmyeagereyes i was sent home with something stronger than paracetamol.

openupmyeagereyes · 11/10/2019 20:25

I don't half waffle on! Hope that post makes sense, it always does to me

Perfect sense. Communication is so complex. All the non-verbal communication is so subtle and NT children learn it all so easily.

We have our meeting next Wednesday after school. I’ll have to go by myself as dh will need to look after ds. I’m a bit nervous about it. Ordinarily I’d expect if things were going differently to how we expected that they would have let us know but with communication being what it is I’m not sure. Even though day to day I hear a little about if he’s had a good or bad day I’m not sure overall how he’s doing.

openupmyeagereyes · 11/10/2019 20:28

Brilliant Harley!

And lucky you. Thankfully the pain eases fairly quickly.

Jeb86 · 11/10/2019 20:29

He is a beaut! And both his big brothers are adorable with him. DS1, has been singing “you are my sunshine” to him which has melted everyone’s hearts. Our 2 year old has given him a “welcome to the family” donk on the head and carries on with his trains!

I’ve been given some form of safe to breastfeed strong codine and advised to buy Paracetamol and ibuprofen. I was pretty frustrated with the midwife’s attitude towards giving me stronger meds whilst I was in hospital. But that is probably a rant for a different thread 😬😂

@harley great news on the poo report - you’ve got to celebrate these things when they come. Hope it lasts!

danni0509 · 11/10/2019 21:56

Open have you tried the gro clock sleep trainer for ds?

I'm just looking at it now on amazon for ds, it's got 5000 reviews mostly positive, it's £20 was £34.99, although I think Argos sell it for about £25 usually. I've looked at it before but didn't think ds would understand, he might now, I'm not too sure.

It's the one with the yellow sun when it means it's time to get out of bed. And the blue star means they have to stay in bed.

Not sure if it would work for my ds suppose I can only try, he's getting up at 4/5am constantly at the minute.

5 is bad enough, but 4am is just taking the piss!

He's not been going to sleep until about 9.30/10pm (he's just fell asleep at 9.35pm after waking at 4.50am this morning) he had his melatonin 2 hours ago and still wouldn't give in. Although he was playing nicely before bed with his toys and not playing up so shouldn't complain too much.

danni0509 · 11/10/2019 21:58

Lovely jeb Thanks

danni0509 · 11/10/2019 22:12

I made him oven chips and bread and butter at 8pm and a banana and a juice as he said he had a hungry tummy, he then asked for a yoghurt and after all that he still said he wanted more, I get this off him every night. He had a big bowl of Nutella porridge at 6 and his actual tea at 5pm.

He wakes early hours with a hungry tummy and then all day at school he's got a 'hungry tummy' he has breakfast, his fruit at school mid morning, his lunch bag and then school have had to resort to giving him an afternoon snack too because he's always asking them for food 🙈 I always pick him up from school with a soreen fruit loaf or a banana too.

Weekends revolve around him asking / crying / kicking off or climbing the kitchen sides for food.

He doesn't eat a big variety, he's still fussy AF he just eats loads of the small amount he likes.

I'm still asleep at 4am and he's shouting breakfast time! are you a hungry boy! is your tummy hungry mum!

What do you do?! I try give him protein etc to fill him up. I've googled 'filling foods' he won't eat a lot mentioned though.

Thought oh maybe a growth spurt but he's been like this a while.

Any ideas?

openupmyeagereyes · 12/10/2019 03:44

danni we’ve had a Gro clock for several years and tried to use it several times but he pays no attention to it. One of the many useless things I have bought. Yesterday the wobble cushion came and ds didn’t want to use it at dinner time.

No idea on the food I’m afraid. He’s not on any other medication is he? I would ask the paed about it when you see them. I guess it’s a SPD thing? He’s not recognising signs of fullness. Sounds like he’s still eating a fair variety of different foods despite his fussiness. We’ve had the same stuff day in, day out for nearly 4 years. Writing it down I can’t believe it’s been that long or that ds seems to be growing ok.

Yesterday Ds slept until nearly 5am, today he was awake at 3 again, we’ve had this for the last week at least now.

livpotter · 12/10/2019 05:41

Wonderful news jeb! Congratulations. Hope you feel a bit less sore today.

Danni I was going to say the same as open. A sensory processing thing. Think it's called interoception, where things like fullness, needing the toilet, emotions are processed etc.
That message to your ds was so sweet. Lovely that he has a friend.

Ds is going to bed brilliantly now but it does mean we're having pretty regular 5am wake ups, yawn. Having said that it's nice to see him so relaxed in the evening pre bed.

LittleSwede · 13/10/2019 16:08

Congratulations Jeb!! Hope you are less sore now and enjoying lots of lovely cuddles Flowers