ASD - how do you respond to physical aggression?

[Blossom4538]

Evening all,

Hope we're all well?

Just wondering this evening really, if there is a recommended strategy or what do you find helps if your child hurts you? Obviously, I appreciate the key is catching them before they get to that point, if possible (sensory overload/meltdown etc) - but what when it is quite sudden, usually when I have to say "no" to something (even if I avoid using the actual word "no" as appreciate this can trigger - but basically, when she can't get her own way) or another example this evening, I was saying goodnight after a nice little chat at bedtime and gave her a snuggle/kiss, as I usually do, and she hurt me then..

What do you do or find is the best way to handle this in your child with ASD? Dd may be high functioning and is 6 years old.

Thank you! x

I wish I had a good answer but didn't want to leave your post without a response. My DD is 12 and I still struggle with this. Trying to remain calm and detached is the main thing. I used to get cross and it never helped. Distraction if possible to stop it escalating.

Thank u!
Yes, I've tried usual strategies for NT children and also got cross at times. The other day I remained quiet and calm and helped stop it escalating. Redirection and distraction helps but she still does it! Usually at home in private but in public once this week.

It's really hard in public, the judging looks don't help you stay calm! It's taken time but these days often if I don't react she will realise herself that's she's done wrong and apologise. But easier said than done I know. Just keep letting her know she is safe and that although you don't like the naughty behaviour you love her always (even whilst she's naughty). That helped my daughter as she sees very black and white and felt we didn't like her when we were cross.

I used ABA behavioural techniques to make sure he knew that using his fists (on himself or others) was not an appropriate response, whatever the stressor. Found him better ways to express that stress. Taught him "put your hands down" and to go off to cool down. As he is now 6ft and 12 stone, at only 14 years old, I am very glad I took the advice early to nip such behaviours in the bud.