Oh heck - Just lost it big time in Virgin

[Jimjams]

Had a day off today. Ds1 is at nursery and my Mum has ds2, so decided to treat myself to a day in town.

Bought a CD in Virgin. The guy in front of me was returning a CD. He clearly had some problems and when asked to write down his name a address called over someone who was obviously his advocate. He turned and gave me a smile (and I don't mean that in a patronising way- it was a very genuine smile). Anyway I was standing there half thinking that if DS1 does really well then maybe he'll be able to live independently with help blah blah blah- the women behind the till was serving me at the same time.

Anwyay after the man had walked away she shot him a look as if she had trodden in something and said "I can't believe there are so many illiterate people around here"- whilst looking as if he was a piece of "sh". I had finshed paying so I gave her one of my "looks" (as dh would say) and walked off. Got outside thought "f this" and turned round, went back in and asked to speak to a manager. The manager came and I lost it! I mean really lost it- I was so angry* I was shaking and could hardly speak. I think it got to me as it was the thought that if ds1 grows up and can mabage as well as him I would be incredibly proud of him, and the thought that he could be spoken to in that way by a pig ignorant girl in Virgin had me seeing red.

Of course I should have gone away until I'd calmed down and then had words. Or I should have had calm words withthe girl herself. I just lost it. Eidsvold- I have so much admiration for you keeping it together in class that time!

I remember once waiting for a tube train that didn't come because someone had fallen onto the line and some horrible bloke was moaning about it and making sick jokes loudly about 'just run over them'. My friend had had an horrific accident involving falling under a train a few years before, and I really lost it with him. I shook from head to foot with rage. I still think I was justified.

It's so heartening for me as a mum of a disabled boy, who will always have mobility problems, and probably never walk wihtout sticks (if he walks at all), to find so many lovely people willing to stand up for those who are more vulnerable to criticism and abuse. Really well done all of you, you should be proud of yourselves.

Had a reply

Apparently the girl concerned "burst into tears" upon being told of my complaint. They also value diversty and provide placements for people with learning disabilities who apparently really enjy being "part of the team".

I dunno maybe its my state of mind this week (very autistic little boy here at them moment- simply dreadful and really quite worrying) but I tend to think hogwash. Not sure I'd want ds1 on any virgin work placement.

Ahh well at least she'll be careful about what she says in public in future. Small steps and all that.

Had a reply

Apparently the girl concerned "burst into tears" upon being told of my complaint. They also value diversty and provide placements for people with learning disabilities who apparently really enjy being "part of the team".

I dunno maybe its my state of mind this week (very autistic little boy here at them moment- simply dreadful and really quite worrying) but I tend to think hogwash. Not sure I'd want ds1 on any virgin work placement.

Ahh well at least she'll be careful about what she says in public in future. Small steps and all that.

So what have they done? Given her a hankie? You did the right thing Jimjams and following it through is great but not very satisfying in the end They should suggest she does some volunteer work, arse wiping preferably!

LOL Davros!

I might be cynical but I suspect those tears were because she got a telling-off rather than because she was upset at causing offence. What's the point of arranging placements for people with learning difficulties etc when they will be forced to work with staff who behave like that?

Oh, poor little flower. So now you're meant to feel guilty for making a very valid complaint. She burst into tears because she was challenged about her attitude, not because she was sorry she was so rude to the customer...as I think we all know deep down. Let's hope she does remember better next time she has a learning disabled customer.

yes apparently she was "upset that she may have ruined your day and worried about your opinion of her".

Hmmm completely misses the point- I wasn't really worried about my day being ruined (and after all we're used ignorant comments) .

"when we talked through the events she realised how her comment had been interpreted and volunteered to ring you herself" blah de blah "I have every confidence that her flippant comment was made without thinking and was certainly not meant to be offensive".

Hmmmmm flippant comment, not meant to be offensive my arse, My son may be autistic but I'm not and I have NO problem interpreting facial expressions. I'm particulalrly good at recognising disgust.

So bugger virgin I'm shopping in HMV in future!

So in plain English she was worried about herself and what people might think of her. Flippant remark my @rse! I'm surprised they didn't add the usual old chestnut and say "Well some of her very best friends have learning difficulties."

HMV here we come....

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I'm disgusted that Virgin dared to come back to you with such lame remars. Sounds like their covering their backs. I hope it doesnt mean this is how they always deal with their staff who make such ignorant comments. Huh, flippant my beep.

Good for you Jimjams. Apart from anything else, it was totally unprofessional of a staff member to discuss another customer with you. It is disgracefully bad customer service. You don't slag off customers, particularly not to other customers. Without them, she wouldn't have a job.

maybe we should all boycott virgin and write explaining why........

that is just part of the culture - blame it on someone else and worry about yourself.... she was being an ignorant, pathetic little cow and I bet my last pound her tears were due to being spoken to - not one ounce of pity for ignorance like that.

I would be demanding to know how the company intends to insure this does not occur again. Maybe I need to go in and do a lesson with them

Virgin is crap compared to HMV anyway!
Well done Jimjams!

I once complained about the lack of service and how crap what there was of it was in M&S in Putney. The woman I complained to said to me
"You can't be horrid to me, I have asthma and I might have an attack" ?!?!?!?!?!

I wasn't shouting or being rude, just asking why there was no service. I just burst out laughing when she said that.

So according to the letter "she realised how her comment had been interpreted and volunteered to ring you herself"

Well jimjams, why not hold Virgin - and her - to this? Contact the manager ever so nicely and say yes, you would like to take the girl up on her offer I'm sure a conversation with you would give her some valuable insights.

Eidsvold, I can feel a new product for Virging coming on. Top 10 lessons from a Mother From Hell! You are the star of course, MrsF can make a cameo Meg appearance, those of us with ASD/AS kids can wander in and out of shot aimlessly as we follow them on their latest whim. The others with kids with CP, DS etc can star as customer extras sent to test the lousy slatterns working there. Then the "best supporting not-actress" Jimjams comes in and gives the worst slattern a right b#ll#cking

We can all stage a sit-in. Ds1 and any others who have door-shutting compulsions can man the doors to stop anyone escaping. MrsF and her ds's will be in charge of switching off any potentially distracting CD's - with cries of "Stop singing!" Eidsvold can give the staff a "How Not To Annoy The Hell Out Of Your Customers" lesson, assisted by Jimjams. Davros could e-mail Richard Branson telling him our demands (ooer!). Not sure what I'd be doing though!

that sounds excellent Davros - who shall we approach to fund it so we can offer it on a consultancy basis to all companies... ohhh what about the owner of Easy jet

coppertop - you could be the MD - organising us all....

My niece works for the boss of Easyjet and she says he's a rude pig! Maybe he and RIchard Branson could have a bare knuckle fight in a pod at the top of the London EYe to raise money for disability awareness? Another new video for our "special" collection.

well done jim jams it took more courage than i will ever have.

Jimjams, please don't shoot me down in flames here, but could it be that this girl has actually learned something from this? She might well only have cried because she was being told off, but whether she likes it or not she will always remember this incident whenever she deals with a customer who might have a learning difficulty.
Your message might only have got through to 1 person, but if it makes only her see things differently then your stand was a success.
Perhaps she's had no experience of people with learning difficulties before. I've never had direct experience (none of my best friends etc), but reading posts on these boards has changed many of my preconceptions.
As for the shopping bit, go to MVC, they're much cheaper! Staff probably still cr*p though.

yes... throw in BA and Ryanair also and we could have a humdinger......

Jordan aka Katie Price and Jodie Marsh slapping it out to raise money for special needs awareness!!!! That would be a fundraiser

On a serious note Jimjams - good on you for speaking out - hopefully she felt bad enough to think twice next time before behaving in such an offensive way.

it actually sounds from the returned comments that her line management is shit - and that maybe equality and diversity training is crap or non existant - maybe you could offer some help?

Well done jimjams. Extremely moving.