Sons Homework what should I do?

[grinnbareit]

My Ds 8 has been diagnosed as having aspergers.

I would just like some advice about his spelling homework. He has been bringing home weekly spelling which he has to copy for a set amount of days and then he has a spelling test at the end of the week. He has copied the words, I have checked him verbally which he got most of correct so I just made a note of any he struggled with and we worked on them later. When I was spoken to by his teacher he asked that ' if I can find the time' could I please help my Ds with his spellings as he hadn't done very well with them during the tests. Must admit I was slightly annoyed by the teacher assuming that Ds was not getting any support but we went home and he wrote the words out (he did get a small amount more incorrect than when he did when he went through them verbally) so again I made a note.

he has now been sent home with the same spellings which I am 100% sure ,and so is he, that he has already learnt (much to his annoyance and mine tbh). I tested him again written just to be sure (much to his annoyance AGAIN!) and sure enough he knows them.

WWYD?

I would go and arrange a meeting with his class teacher. In it I would discuss how confident he feels about the special needs of a child with Aspergers, maybe give him some tipson where he can look for advice.
Then tell him explicitly how you help your DS with his spellings, and how he does. Ask if he can suggest any alternative techniques? Also explain how discouraged your son s when he gets the same spellings week after week.

Then go home and record all that was discussed in a diary, with dates and certainly any promises made by the school.

I'd keep a log of time spent on them each day and give it to the teacher. If he isn't achieving and you are showing the school the help he does get at home then the school need to take a look at how they are teaching him and what support they should be giving him. This is about the school passing the buck and you should not be made to feel bad about the difficulties he has when clearly you are a supportive mum. Ask them what they intend to do from here instead.

I would go and have a word with his teacher and ask how he is doing/why he is getting those words again.
As zzzz said, it might be a (strange) way to boost his confidence or it might be that he isn't doing as well at school.
Perhaps take the sheet where he has done some work, did the spelling with you. explain he seems to correct himself when he is doing it verbally.

perhaps too you can teach your ds to say the word in his head before/whilst he writes it down?

xpsot. We seem to be on the same lines!

zzzzz never thought of it that way, but I think it may be having the opposite affect.

mummytime good idea about meeting and making a record of what was said, but I have spent so much time over the years justifying myself that I am now rapidly losing my patience and super calm exterior.

beautifulgirls Keeping a log of time taken would be a good idea there is always the homework policy that needs to be covered , should I also include time taken during his outbursts too? because if I just went by time taken to copy the actual spellings it would be minutes, if I include his frustrated outbursts/time taken to calm him due to having to do something he has already learnt this would take possibly 30+ minutes? (I have visions of it already ). It was hard enough just discussing it with him when he handed me the spellings, unhappily telling me that his teacher said all he has to do is copy them that's all. Heavens above!

I do have copies of all the spellings etc but I have this sudden stubborn streak which makes me think why do I need to prove something to you??

comeonyoutwo sorry missed you off! We looked at Ds's books a few months back and there was one piece of work which did stand out, it was some sentences which he had used his weekly spellings in and there was several which I knew he had learnt which he had mis-spelt.

The fact he is still misspelling words in his written work isn't surprising. My 2 dcs do that (one Nt, the other prob AS) but it has never been a reason to ask them to do the spelling again.
In my dcs' school they redo them only if they have them wrong during the spelling test.
No idea how to support a child who makes his spelling right as words but then can't write them correctly in a piece of writing. I've asked the teachers quite a bit but never had an answer...

There is another thread in Education I think, where someone is panicking because her DCs school has stopped spelling tests. If you read the wise replies there you will see that spelling tests don't help spelling.

My calm approach was becauseof you have to keep dealing other the school its the only thing you can do. (and I know its not easy).

Does he actually have a problem with spelling - not in spelling tests but in his written work? I used the visualisation technique of learning to spell words for spelling tests with DS1 so he used to get them all right but he is also dsylexic and would spell the same words incorrectly in his work - even different spellings of the same word in the same sentence. He does not generalise and so from his pov the spelling test has got nothing to do with his written work and there is no reason to retain correct spellings when you receive the next set of words.

Visualisation involves seeing the word in the 'minds eye' so that DC can answer specific questions - what is the third letter, spell the word backwards etc. It can also be made multisensory - tracing the letter in the air, walking it out etc and the mental images can be given colours, sizes etc.

Hmm the spelling test, my Ds has mentioned he can't hear the words the teacher is saying, and he does tend to miss hear what is said quite often. I'm wondering if noise may be an issue here..ponder...ponder. He reacts badly to loud noises but also as I have noticed over the passing months quiet noises.

I think what I will do is photocopy his spellings written at home, add a little note where/when/time taken general enviroment eg quiet, if he objects to the sound of his sister eating crisps at the other end of the room etc. Or do you think that would be a bit OTT??

Yes I would log all difficulties encountered in doing the work too. I have taken to sending DDs homework back with notes on it about how we did it because one day she will sail through and other she will be clueless as to what to do. I have even sent homework back with nothing other than her name and a note on it to say it wasn't done due to extreme distress and upset over doing it. At least you are showing that you are not uninterested in helping him and will give the teachers a clearer picture of what might be possible at home and what is likely to fail.

lovely, thank you beautifulgirls, I just hope Ds's teacher doesn't think I am being undermining. I will try to be as pleasant as possible.

Sorry keeponkeepingon1 I only just read your post. The only piece of work which he struggled with (spelling wise that had me scratching my head about) was the one I mentioned above, the others in his book seemed to be a case of reversed letters (b and d) or letters in the wrong place (a random 'i' will appear where it shouldn't be) and there was just a reminder for Ds to correct (he does tend to do this often at home and when he does he will self correct before he completes the word, I have pointed this out but no-one else seems to see it as a problem ). I know the class were given spelling tests to check all the spellings covered and that's when I had the feedback from Ds's teacher. I will have a google about visualisation. Something else he has said is that it is very difficult for him to get the words from his head and write them.

I had a good book on visualisation called "Seeing spells Achieving". It might help you with ideas. I would also find out where your son sits in class, it can make a huge difference.

My ds had this problem with maths and it turned out he couldn't really hear the teacher and had huge problems copying from the board to maths copy, when this was realised the teacher moved him closer to her and now when she writes on white board it comes up on a laptop which she positions right in ds eyeline and this has made a huge difference, so maybe that might help, I also write in his journal how long homework takes, some days he will fly through it but then on a bad day it takes forever, he also gets very tired writing and this doesn't help, so I just jot down in journal that tiredness/meltdown contributed to homework outcome that particular day, and also I did find that noise in the classroom is a real problem for him.