Just received an ADHD diagnosis and have a few queries ...

[bodiddly]

I wonder if anyone can help. We had an assessment meeting for ds just before Xmas when we were told he has moderate to severe ADHD hyperacticity with impulsive sub type. We were pretty sure he had ADHD but were surprised to hear that it was deemed moderate to severe rather than mild.

The Dr gave us a mountain of information to read about medication etc and we have been asked back for a review meeting this week. Does anyone know what happens now? Is it a question of them wanting to see us to see if we want to medicate or are we likely to be offered further options?

On another matter ds got upset today when I asked him very calmly why he had lied about making his bed and started crying. I walked out of the room for one moment and when I came back in he was punching himself in the head with closed fists repeatedly. He was so upset and kept saying he felt like doing it because he was bonkers. He is not a violent child at all and is not aggressive or defiant. I've never known him to do anything like this - is it usual? I was so upset seeing him like it and gave him cuddles etc to calm him down but I didn't really get to the bottom of what was going on. Does anyone have any advice for a novice at dealing with this sort of thing please?

My DS has both ADHD and ASD. When we were given the diagnosis of ADHD we were like you given information and suggested attending a parental course. As DS was under 6 at that time medication wasn't mentioned although I knew this could be an option in the future.

We struggled by for the next few months and my son turned 6 medication was then offered and subsequently we took the offer. This was because I had got to the point where I had tried all other avenues. DS is very impulsive and hard work basically. So we started medication and it has totally made a difference!!

With regards to the anger my DS is a very angry child and has loads of horrendous outbursts!! I just have to leave him sometimes as no matter what you do nothing will calm him down! xx

Thanks Anna - my ds isn't an angry child which is the worrying thing. He was so upset and punching himself in the head really hard saying he was bonkers. Made me so sad not knowing how to help him.

DS2 is 6yo with ADHD/ASD. We were offered meds until we realised that family history of specific heart problems meant the meds were not a good option for DS2. So that option is out for us.

DS2 isn't an angry child, but does have great difficulty when he gets upset. He cannot control his reactions and does sometimes punch himself or bang his head when he is upset. It is difficult, as he simply does not redirect well in those instances, as he is just to upset to take any information in at the time. And when the upset is done, it's like it didn't happen, which means he is completely disconnected from it - so doesn't understand why we're talking to him about being upset. Because at that point, he's not anymore, so to him it's just "gone." If that makes any sense.

Do you mind me asking how you reached the decision that medication was right for you? Am going round in circles changing my mind every few minutes.

I'd begged for it as was at the end of my tether stopping him jumping off high stuff etc. But we weren't certain, so tried a low dose for a little while to see, and it helped

Thank you. They offered it straight away for ds but because he is well behaved and achieving in school most people don't realise he has problems and all think we would be mad to medicate. They don't see the other side of it though.

I am concerned that if he is sad and thinks he is "bonkers" that medication might make him depressed. On the other hand I guess it could help resolve those feelings.

That is so good to hear that your ds is doing so well with it. Do you mind me asking how old he is? Also, was it immediately noticeable the improvement? My ds is 7 and without being told specifically is remarkably aware that things aren't right. He tells me he has a bad brain. It's so wrong for a child to feel like that. Did your friends and family support you? Some close friends seem to understand but everyone else seem to think we would be tantamount to child abusers to drug our own child.

Sorry to ask more questions but did you opt for medication that lasted 4 hours or 12?

Hi Bodidly .. My son has a dx of mild-mod ADHD only, he is 9 and he got the dx when he was 7 like yours. Our paed gave him a mild dx for home and other situations ie: clubs, footy etc and a moderate dx for how his symptoms manifest in the classroom. Did you see how his school marked him on the Connors questionnaire? (assuming both you and they completed one). Our ds wasn't deemed severe enough to have meds, but his school have asked us several times if we have considered so as to help his concentration and attention span. We are caught between a rock and a hard place as I am petrified with any detrimental or long term affects they may have on him. I always come back to the same decision of 'no'. I asked the paed if they would guarantee that he would have no negative side affects and of course the answer was that they couldn't do that as some kids do. There has been research into mental health issues caused by these meds, but in the same breath ... some great results for children to who have gone on to achieve well with no ill effects. But I still sit uneasy with any possible long term mental health and physical side affects. So one option is to trial them and see what happens ..... grrr, not easy No one that hasn't been in your situation cannot criticise your thought process, they have no idea what it's like being a parent of a child with these issues.

Thanks so much justabout that's very helpful. Your ds is about the same age as mine. Does he fully understand ADHD and his diagnosis etc. We haven't really explained things to ds yet. Also, does he have to swallow the tablets or are they put into his food? Sorry for all the questions but its so refreshing to find someone that has been through something similar!

MadameSin my ds isn't too bad at school it's at home that we notice the problems the most. The school's Connors report wasn't very helpful but the psychiatrist diagnosed him on an American system as she understood the school weren't very aware due to a lack of understanding about ADHD and a belief that there were worse children in the class. Ds, although fidgety, is well behaved most of the time so slips under the radar. She deemed him moderate to severe and offered medication. It's a horrible decision to have to make isn't it? I think justabout makes sense by saying unless you try you may well be denying them the ability to be calmer and happier. Am considering asking for a trial but have a meeting to discuss other options booked first.

did she do any assessment for sensory issues?, there is a strong co-morbidity for ADHD and sensory processing disorder - but the later is not well understood in general, and I have not found many pediatricians really know much about it (same said for some OT"s).

The reason why I ask is the punching in the head gives very powerful sensory "feedback", which a child with sensory issues would find calming. It is something my nephew used to do, but believe he has now stopped since he has started sensory integration training......

I know it sounds confusing, but it would definitely be something I investigated before I looked to medication. I can recommend a fab therapist in London, where my DS goes.

Thanks everyone - I will look into the various things people have mentioned as this is all very new to us.

Out of interest does anyone else have massive problems with tiredness? Ds gets very over-tired during the week despite early nights etc. I'd love him to be able to do more exercise as everyone seems to suggest but he does football now and barely copes with that. On one hand he is less fidgety etc sometimes when when he has exercised but then being tired from it all leads to problems in other ways.

So sorry to hear about your ds and the wheelchair justabout. Do they know whether it is a temporary problem?

Definitely not falling asleep! He gets very teary about any slight thing. If you tell him off or ask him to do something etc. He isn't really an irritable child just can't cope with it all. He goes to bed by 7 almost every night but takes a while to turn off and get to sleep. He wakes any time from 6.15 when I leave for work until 7-7.30.

At times we go for very long bike rides and he loves it and it definitely helps him for the rest of that day but later in the week it probably takes its toll. It's almost as if you are damned if you do and damned if you don't.

Did you try the fish oils etc? Was it hard to teach a 7 year to swallow a tablet?