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Original poster

Anyone else hate sports days etc

14 replies

herdiegirl · 28/06/2011 20:54

I'm Not blaming Ds's school as they looked after him well today. DS1 has AS and hates sports day. Today was that day!

DS only joined in one of the races and ended up in tears afterwards. His social skills teacher was there specifically to keep an eye on him and did comfort him etc. They also didn't force Ds and let have some time away later.

It's just that I really feel for DS on days like this and the differences with his peers are getting more obvious. It's not just sports day, its carol services and that type of thing as well.

He's otherwise doing fine at the school and is fairly good academically, but I think the pressure to "perform" in front of everyone must really get to him. By the way he is a fit and active lad and did a sponsored walk with beavers on Sat for 11.5 miles (he's only 7)

OP posts:

bochead · 28/06/2011 20:58

Mine's not going - public park and parents aren't allowed.

'Fraid I don't trust his 21 year old TA to stop him bolting - esp as he knows the town centre and park better than the ta does.

So used now to being called a bad Mum, I really don't care what the school has to say, neither am I bothered by the threat of an unauthorised abscence for a kid who is still only part time anyway ; )

5inthebed · 28/06/2011 21:30

Yes.
Todays was the irst one I have been to in the three years DS has been at school. it was a fun run, so kids just running around a square, DS2 enjoyed it as meant he could run with no competition and he got to run with his friends and me and DH took turns as well.

Oblomov · 28/06/2011 21:51

I am worried about ds. he is rubbish, bless him. I think he came last in most races in r and yr 1, but seems oblivious to this. he's been getting booed , which teacher and senco played down. dh is going this year.

Ringosbaby · 28/06/2011 22:15

My DD has spina bifida resulting in incontinence and motor delay among other things. Last yr (reception) was bloody awful. She cried her heart out that she was last at everything, wet herself because the time for her catheter to be done was missed, and then soiled herself and stopped in the middle of the obstacle race to tell her teacher.

Trying again this year because she has a lovely teacher and has had funding for a ta this year.

As herdiegirl said, its days like this when the difference between her and her peers are at their most obvious.

Rosebubbles · 28/06/2011 22:16

Snap! We are in the same boat. My son's school did relay races today amongst other things and he came last (again). He was upset not only because he was last but because the other children were teasing him (albeit playfully to them). We just try and concentrate on the things he likes doing best when he comes home. Like you were are noticing the widening gap between him and his peers, although I do try not to compare him but its hard not too. Well done to your son for doing the sponsored walk. :)

Tiggles · 28/06/2011 22:37

My worst moment in a sports day was in a team 'race' last year where the team had to pass a ball between themselves - over head of first person/under legs of next member etc. DS's processing speed was a bit slow (as was an older boy on their team so not just him) and an older girl shouted at him "You are causing us to lose this, hurry up, it's all your fault". I could hear her from across the field :(.

DS (AS) hates sports day - he was so happy this year that it was cancelled twice due to rain, then rescheduled for strike day, so cancelled again. Unfortunately had to break it to him that it has been rescheduled afterall...

The first few he had at his old school he wouldn't join in - they were all team type activities no actual races. When he was in year 1 he was left to swing off the scaffolding by the portacabins. I know I could have stepped in, but I wanted to see if the school even noticed, apparently not...

DS2 (probably ASD) on the other hand is soooo looking forward to it. Apparently he wins ALL the races, even the other kids go home and tell their parents how good he is! Not sure where he gets it from .

BlackL · 28/06/2011 22:51

totally agree! Our school isnt too bad, they dont do the usual competive races, just relays with different activities, not even a running race thankfully. tho its still tough. Last year my son stopped half through a course and dandered slowly to sit down and have a wee rest and refused to do any more, bless him. This year he gave it his all, tho differences are obvious. I had a grumpy boy for 2 weeks leading up to it with comments like, Im rubbish at this and that. (musta been practising loads at school) Broke my heart, but hes back to his usual perky self again :o

Original poster

herdiegirl · 28/06/2011 23:14

Thanks for your replies. It's comforting to know that I'm not the only one who feels this way. I feel that the other mums can't really understand, eventhough there are also NT kids who don't like sports day.

Am also really proud of how well he did with his sponsored walk - don't think I could have walked as far as he did (well and function at all the next day)! Bless him he was happy to raise money for guide dogs for the blind.

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mum0fthree · 29/06/2011 13:57

I was dreading sports day, ds 7 (AS) always comes last and generally runs off the field crying mid race as soon as he realises he is going to lose.

This year he was given IMPORTANT jobs lol, collecting the sacks, hoops etc and he had his own clipboard.

The other parents enjoyed watching their dc's running and I enjoyed watching ds doing his jobs looking pleased as punch.

drivemecrazy63 · 29/06/2011 15:48

i dread it also and then often ds would have a meltdown and go inside and id be left not knowing whats going on watching other peoples dcs race and not my own then to top it all when he would come back out id end up doing the embarrassing parents race (im a big woman)

rebl · 29/06/2011 15:51

Not had it yet as ds is only in reception. Now with his hip problems as well as the normal issues I've been quite worried about it. His teacher brought it up at drop off today and suggested that maybe he should be off that day so as not to stress him out. I totally agree and I'm glad that they've suggested it.

EllenJaneisnotmyname · 29/06/2011 16:08

DS2 cheats outrageously and everyone lets him! Probably because the other children prefer a happy DS2 to a shouty, miserable one!

Swiddle · 29/06/2011 19:20

I was dreading our sports day, as last year my AS DS was in floods of tears when his team didn't win.
What is in fact an anxiety-based meltdown for him is seen as bad sportsmanship by other kids and parents. It really doesn't help his (non-existent) popularity.
So I spent the lead up to it rehearsing what to do if he loses, how to try not to cry, etc.... and then he only went and bloody won the shotput!

MabliG · 29/06/2011 19:35

I have to say I am VERY proyd of my DD today in her sports day. She has AS and very poor motor skills. BUT, she competed in a range of events including the 400 meters. Even though everyone else had finished the race a long tiem before her she carried on and her assistant ran with her. She felt so great that she finished the race I was on the brink of tears. Shame that we are driven by 1st 2nd and 3rd and everyone else is a 'loser', because in my eyes my DD was amazing today and I couldn't be more proud of her.

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