Can't cope with DD1 any longer!!!!!!!!!

[butty]

I am getting No where!!!!!!!!
Chloe is going from bad to worse day by day.
She doesn't stop, she does't shut up, She never listens and i am fed up of arguing with her.
The simplest of tasks are turning into world war 3!!!!!!!!!!!
The pead still says that she hasn't got ADHD,
The teacher is saying that chloe is being quite good in school and that her behaviour is like another girl on her table, bearing in mind that chloes table is the one 2 one support table as she is having real difficulties with reading and writing and is in the bottom 4 of the class.
She does attention seek at school and needs a lot of pushing and persistence when working, i am just wondering if this could be linked with her problems.???
I really have had enough of her and i am feeling a lot of anger towards her at the mo which i know i shouldn't be, but i just can't help it.
She never behaves and is still being verbally and at times still physically aggressive towards me and dylan and her dad!!!!
Will it ever get any easier or do i have to throw in the towel and admit defeat from the pros who think that she is fine????
Feeling really down with everything at the mo and with dylans results looming over me for the 17th i am going out 3 - 4 times a week getting so pissed just to forget about home!!!!!!!
I know it is wrong, but it is my release and keeps me going.
i dont drink at home so i know i dont have drinking problems, but now my mum is getting on my case saying that i am drinking far too much and that i need to see a counceller, but in all hinesight that would be fine if i hadn't already been down that route on several occassions, i know my mum is trying to help, but where is she when i need to get away from it all???
Sorry to rant, i am just note coping too well at the moment!!

Butty.xxxx

Hiya, i have managed to sneak on for a while.
I sang, Whiteflag by Dido, Ironic by Alanis Morrisette and One way or Another By Blondie!!!
It was packed out and luckily some of mates came down to surprise me!!!!
I'm just thinging now what to do with the money!!!???
Nah, i'll deffo spend it on the kids for crimbo, but i may treat my self to some new jumpers and jeans for winter!!!!
Butty.xxx

You have got alot on your plate at such a young age and working too. I know myself working can be a bit of respite from home. But it can make you less patient and more easily irritated due to being tired. Do you think this may be part of why its getting on top of you? Not that you should give it up but sometimes it helps to recognise it maybe playing a part. Good luck with your appointment and xmas shopping .

Hi SOBLUE,
I only work part time, all day monday and the rest mornings till 1pm.
I really enjoy my job as an insurance manager and it helps me to keep sane.
The work load isn't a lot and it changes from day to day!!
It also pays very well so that i can provide extra for my kids with out worrying about the bills and it enables me to have my social life!!
My boss is very family orientated, so whenever i need time off he doesn't hesitate and he also pays me for it, know matter what the situation is.
Butty.xxx

Hi, I have read your thread and the replies and really feel for you. Although I do not have a child with SN of my own, being a childminder for the past 10 years I have looked after many chilren who have . At present I care for a child with Complex SN and a child with GDD.I was wondering how old your children are and whether you had considered getting a childminder to care for either of them so you could spend time with the other for treats etc. A childminder could look after either one of them on an hourly, daily, or one off basis either after school or weekends or during school holidays. Many childminders have experience with many SNs and would be only too happy to help.

Hi babydales,
chloe is 5 in year 1 at school and dylan is almost 3 and he attends the local SN nursery 5 afternoons a week.
I have changed my hours at work so that i can have more time with the children as i didn't used to see enough of them.
I wouldn't put them with a childminder again as i want to spend the time with them, no matter how hard it is at times.
Chloe has me for an hour a day everyday after school until dylan gets back, so i try to do things with her then.
Dylan gets me one day of the weekend to himself as chloe goes to her dads on a friday/saturday depending which week, so they both get ample time alone with me, which i think is far more than what other siblings may get alone with their parents.
But thanks for the advise, the thought does cross my mind every now and then when it gets too much to take!!
Butty.xxx

I hope everything works out for you.