Please help! DD is 4.5 and isn't potty trained yet. I know that autism can cause trouble with this but I really don't know where to go from here. We have been working with the health visitor for a while around toileting but they now feel a referal to the bowel and bladder service would be good for DD as things aren't resolving. But that's going to take months and she might be in primary school by that point.
DD is recognising sometimes that she needs to go, but needs heavy prompting and we have to use alarms to remind her to go. The alarms are every 40 minutes as this has been the most successful timing for her but somehow she still manages to have accidents inbetween. If she does go in her nappy she won't say anything either.
We use reward charts with a small reward every time she goes (a grape because they're her favourite) and if she uses the potty successfully she can have a treat at the end of the week. But she still isn't staying dry. We have adjusted fluid intake, we have tried going straight to pants, we have tried putting kitchen roll in the nappy. Nothing is making a difference. We can't tell if she's actually unaware or just doesn't want to use the toilet.
Please, any suggestions you have would be greatly appreciated!