Sorry, this is likely to be long as I'm going to try and give all info up front. (Hate those threads where iy gradually trickles out!)
Background
DS was born in May by CS. He instantly latched well to feed but wanted to feed almost constantly. I realised this was quite normal for a newborn but the second night in hospital, neither of us got much sleep and the next morning MW set us up to co-sleep for a few hours so I could get some rest. She said it wasn't policy to do so but she could see it was needed. It worked really well.
First night home we really struggled so the second night tried co-sleeping again and again it worked really well so we continued.
DS continued to need constant feeding and didn't gain weight so I felt really pressurised to feed well so he could put on weight. I was determined to continue excl BF so stuck with the co-sleeping to ensure the weight went on.
When he was a month old he was finally diagnosed with a tongue tie. By this time he'd dropped drom 75th centile at birth to 2nd centile. Fortunately he was happy and healthy in every other way and from when he had his tongue tie sorted he started putting on weight and now - at 21 weeks - is back up to 25th centile and still excl BF.
At 10wks, we moved his cot next to my side of the bed and took the side off so my mattress was immediately next to his with the aim of gradually getting him to sleep there.
We're now in the situation where he will - on a good night - sleep in his cot for the first 2 or 3 hrs before rolling from his mattress to mine. If I feed him and try and put him back in his cot asleep, he wakes up and cries and DH says "Just bring him into bed".
The other issue is that due to the co-sleeping, he is used to feeding to sleep and has only ever fallen asleep whilst feeding or in the car and a couple of times out walking in the buggy.
Finally, the other thing that's brought this to a head is that he's just got his 2 bottom teeth and as he falls asleep on me, he's catching me with his teeth. Not quite a bite but enough for me to feel the pain.
What I want to achieve
- him sleeping in his cot overnight
- him settling himself to sleep
and ultimately
- him being able to have a daytime nap in his cot
- him sleeping through
My plan
The next couple of days I have stuff going on so Wednesday, DH will put the side of the cot back on and from Wed evening,
- I will do a bedtime routine with a feed, bath, change into vest and gro-bag and final feed.
- As DS starts to fall asleep, I will delatch him and put him down on his back in his cot.
- If he doesn't settle, I'll repeat the final feed and last step. I'll only repeat this once though.
- If he still doesn't settle, I'll try pick up, put down method
My questions
- Does my plan make sense?
- What time do you think I should do his bedtime routine? Currently he falls asleep on me at about 9pm and them has another feed around 10pm which he falls asleep on and gets transferred onto his mattress.
- I think consistency is key but if it gets to 3am and neither of us has had any sleep, do I persist with pick up, put down?
- Any other tips?
- Anyone likely to be around in the early hours of Thurs morning to help me stay strong? (DH and I have agreed he will sleep in the spare room whilst I get this sorted).
Really not looking forward to doing this but I know in the long run, once it's cracked, it will be much better.