Ways to get my 4 month old to sleep better at night?

[Schulte]

DD2 (nearly 4 months) had weeks of sleeping really well, going to bed at 7.30pm, settling herself to sleep, waking up for one feed at 4am. Then she had her first set of jabs at 12 weeks and all hell broke loose. She got diarrhoea and started waking up several times a night to poo and feed. Her first waking of the night happened earlier and earlier until I decided I might as well introduce a dream feed. But now her poos are finally back to normal and I need her sleep pattern to improve again, as I am permanently exhausted.

Currently she goes to bed at 7.30, self settles, has a dream feed at 10pm, then wakes around 2am. Sometimes I can get her back to sleep without a feed at that time (by rubbing her tummy or giving her the occasional dummy), then she'll wake up for a feed around 3.30. After that, she'll sleep a little, then wake up again at 5.45 and I have to take her into bed with me to get another half hour before DD1 gets up for the day! So all in all, I am up three times a night. What I want her to do is 5-6 hours after her dream feed. Surely that's not asking too much at this age?!

So what do I do?

Simply not feed her before 4am in the hope that she'll eventually get the message and not bother waking up?

Try to fill her up with a bottle of formula at 10pm?

Feed her at 2am but make that feed shorter and shorter until she drops it herself?

Drop the dream feed - actually I have tried that and she wakes up for it now because she's used to it!

Give up trying to change her sleep pattern and pray that she'll sort herself out some time soon?

Sorry for epic post but I feel you need all the information... Any ideas greatly appreciated!

Hi Frekkles - I'm sorry it's not working for you... all I can say is that I think your LO is a bit younger than mine, and we went through what you are going through, but last night, at 24 weeks, Penelope slept through! 7pm to 7am and not a whisper! The first time it has ever happened, I grant you, but the feeling is elation. Only a month ago she was waking 5, 6 or 7 times in a night so this is just unbelievable.

Prior to last night (and the last 10 days before that) she was waking up just once for a feed, having established this routine through CC (as per my earlier posts). I know it's hard to listen to them cry but it might be the answer (and sleep!) both you and your LO are desperate for.

P.S. Penelope did have her first solids meal yesterday (apple and oatmeal cereal, followed by toast) so who knows if that helped?

Good luck!

how are things going folks?

Things have definately improved. Infact last night I had the longest sleep i've had since he was born. He went to bed at 8, I followed at 930 and neither of us woke up again till 530! So I had an 8 hour sleep! followed by another two and a bit as he fed for 20 mins, settled straight away and then slept again till 8!

joy joy joy!

it's taken abit of effort to get here though and alot of help from my bloke, but things seem to be improving. Used a improvised mixture of shush pat from the baby whisperer, the pantley pull off for ncss, an hour or so controlled crying (me and baby), a dummy, a cuski, earplugs and rescue remedy, a beefed up bedtime routine, enforcing three naps a day and moving the boy into his own room. But in the end i suspect the biggest thing to help has been the boy's discovery and subsequent addiction to sucking his thumb.

I doubt we're out of the woods yet, but glad things have improved just now. i was so tired!

Hey Frekkles - that's great news! How have the last 2 weeks been?

I've sought out this thread as we are now moving on to the last stage... getting Penny to sleep 12 hours straight... she had been going to bed at 7, waking at 4am for a 5 min (3oz feed - she is now fully on the bottle) and then straight back to sleep until getting up at 7am. So very manageable, but DH and I bit the bullet last night and decided to drop the 4am feed. She's been at nursery now for a week (and is exhausted when she gets home) and on solids for 3 or 4 weeks I think. So a big girl now who doesn't need to wake in the night for a poxy 3oz! So we did cc last night (which worked well for us getting her down from 5 feeds a night to 1 a couple of months back). So she woke at 3:40am, I shhh / patted and left... she cried for 8 mins (was going to go back in at 10) and then stopped! The started again at 4:15 and I went in again, shh / patted, left and then I fell asleep so she must have done too. Next thing I know it's 7:10am! Hurray!

So same drill again tonight. Here's hoping after 3 or 4 nights she'll just sleep through. (Oh and she wasn't ravenous starving at 7:10 either... she was happy to get dressed first before eating...)

So we're nearly there... was sad to lose the last breast feed, but I'm so pleased it looks like it's not going to be a huge battle to drop this final feed. She's over 6 months now so she's ready.. (and so am I!)

Come back and tell us how it's going...

Hey Boobz, what great news, you'll soon have your nights back to yourself! Well done you and P.

Things here not too great. Hazel slept well for 3 weeks, also just waking for one feed around 4am, and once even managed to go through till 5.30. Then we came back from holiday, she had an infection and things went back to bad with 3 night feeds. We're going to start solids in the next 3 weeks so I don't expect things will improve before then. I might then have to go down the cc route. I still don't get all this - dd1 slept through from 3 1/2 months old and never woke in the night again after that!

Hello ladies - Frekkles and Boobz, sounds like things are going well for you

Oscar slept through from 7pm to 7am for the first time ever two nights ago. I woke up every couple of hours expecting to have to feed him unfortunately (grrrrrr!)

We were on holiday for 2 weeks and we did pick up put down for every nap and only did one feed after his 6.30pm feed (usually at 9.30pm) and DH settled him every time he woke after that - so couldn't have done it if we hadn't been on holiday... He definitely wasn't hungry as he woke up at 6.45am most mornings after being settled a couple of times in the night without feeding and was happy to pootle around in his cot with some toys for half an hour.

I'm really really hoping that he will keep his good habits - he was going to sleep on his own for naps and at bedtime when we were on holiday.

Last night was rubbish, but he is teething at the moment so maybe that's why.

I really really hope this is the glimpse of the light at the end of the tunnel...

Fingers crossed Bicnod - sounds like you are making progress...

Well, night 2 of doing cc.... but... she slept through! So we didn't have to do it! Put to bed at 6:30 (she was exhausted after nursery... she has about 3+ hours worth of naps with me at home but only 1.5 hours at nursery)... and then we were woken up at 7am on the dot! Not a peep out of her all night!

I know one night doesn't make a trend, but we're really hope we've cracked it..

Good to everyone.

Hi Boobz, that's amazing! You know I think I'll copy what you did. H currently wakes up around 2am for a feed, which is fine by me although I'd prefer it if she managed to wait until 3 or 3.30. After the 2am feed she then wakes at 4.30 or 5am for another feed, and then wakes AGAIN around 6am to come into bed with me. When she finally wakes up for the day at 7am she's not hungry and refuses to drink even a drop of milk. So this tells me she shouldn't need the 5am feed, right? I am going to try and convince her to sleep through from 2am to at least 6am. Wish me luck!

So how did it go Feirabend? Penny has now had 4 nights of sleeping through... she did wake at 5:30am this morning chatting to herself but it wasn't crying so I didn't go in and shh / pat her... I just listened on the monitor for 5 mins and then I fell asleep so I guess she did to. I had to wake her up at 7:00 to get her up for the day too. So, a raging success so far! I just hope teething / illness doesn't screw it all up, but so far, she seems to have cracked it (and gosh are me and DH pleased!). It does make us wonder whether we should have tried this earlier though, since she's so easily been persuaded to sleep through... it really was habit rather than hunger that was waking her up so it seems.

However I do think the solids and especially going to nursery has made the biggest difference (and stopping BF-ing) - all have helped to get her to where she is now, so if I'd have tried it at 4 or 5 months, it might not have worked and just caused heart ache.

Onwards!

More progress here - Oscar slept through 7pm-7am again last night (only for the second time - the few nights after the first time were not so good). But he's teething at the moment so we'll see if our luck runs out tonight! But either way, he is definitely more able to settle himself nowadays so we're getting there.

Boobz - does indeed sound like you've got it cracked. Don't beat yourself up about not trying it earlier - I reckon the reason O is settling himself better now is not just because of our pick up put down regime, but because he is older and has started solids. Babies change all the time and its impossible to pin it down to one thing I think.

Good news Bicnod! It's such an incredible feeling, no? Even if short lived....Penny couldn't be settled last night at midnight - me and DH had gone to bed at 8 because we were both ill and I think she'd caught it too so I didn't feel able to try and do CC, so we just gave her 3oz and she slept through till 8! Back to the regime tonight though, now we are all better.

Hmmm I am not good at this CC malarky after all... not at 5am when H wakes her big sister up! Currently she wakes at 3am, then between 5-5.30 when she wants to come into bed with me. This morning we did let her cry but that meant we didn't get any more sleep after 5am, when normally we all have another half hour or so when she's in bed with us But I know it can't go on like this! Luckily after a few days of refusing food, she seems to now have taken to her purees so as weaning progresses, I hope to see some sort of improvement... Early night for us today!

Hi Feierabend - how's it going?

Hi Boobz

There is progress, but it's slow! We had a whole week of great nights last week, with Hazel waking up between 5am and 6am for a feed, then back to sleep until about 7am. The last few nights though she's started waking earlier again - last night she fed at 4.15. So I am tired and grumpy today and have decided to be strict with her again and not feed her before 5am, then slowly push her feed to 5.30, then 6... she's still not keen on her solids so I am not 100% convinced that she isn't hungry / thirsty. I might offer her water instead of the breast too when she wakes in the night.

The problem with letting her cry is that she wakes DD1 up, it just doesn't seem fair.

How are things with you?