Support thread for those who were under the misguided illusion that their DC would sleep through by six mo - come and join!

[arthymum]

Did you assume that your DC would be sleeping through by the time they were 6 mo - and now you've hit the milestone you realise you were wrong, wrong, wrong as you stagger out of bed 1, 2, 3 times a night?

Do you sometimes can't help but wonder if you'd done things differently (BF/FF/stuck with the dreamfeed/co-slept/put them in their own cot/followed a GF routine/listened to your MIL ) you'd be getting more sleep?

Do you sometimes dread meeting up with other mums with perfect sleepers (especially when said babies are way younger and tinier than yours)?

Are you in a permanent state of confusion and doubt about whether to 'try' something or not (CC, ssh-patt, PUPD, NCSS etc.) but feel it's never the right time (teething, cold, too young) and not sure anyway whether you have the bottle/energy to see it through?

Do you hold out faint hopes that they'll sleep better when they're on solids/when the teeth come through/when they're another pound heavier/when they're in the new gro-bag/when they're on more solids - and each time - wrong again?

Do you mostly cope okay but every now and then feel tired and miserable and sorry for yourself and burst into tears at the postman or get into a petulant fight in Sainsbury's?

Do you secretly fear that you'll be on here in 3 years time, posting about the fact that you haven't slept for nearly 4 years?

Then come and join me! I've seen you lurking on other threads but feel that we need a place to congregate. Share your tears, tantrums, triumphs and tips - and hopefully one by one, we can all eventually disappear off the thread and into the land of nod....

Yup, I was defo under the illusion that DS would be sleeping through by now he is nearly 7 months now.
We co sleep cos he was a poorly thing when he was a wee one and now I love it.
But how on earth am I to get him out of my bed and into the, only other room we have, with my DD if he won't sleep well?

My parents now think I will just have to get through it for a few days and he should settle. My Bro has done that with his DD but that is ok if babes is going into a room on their own, to let them shout it out and CC for a few days would be just awful for poor DD who was a great sleeper (one of those ones who slept through from 10 weeks, grr she had me set up for a big fall)
Think I might start a thread to get help but wanted to pop my head in to say hello and look foward to having some support.

Hmm...just endured 90 mins of non-stop crying she's not been this bad for a long time. I'd changed her, fed her, Calpol'd her and the only thing that stopped her crying was me holding her which obviously is not an all-night solution. I've just let her cry for 15 mins and she's finally stopped. I hate leaving her to it but sometimes I just have no idea what to do...grr. Out of the blue too cos she's been lovely today; I wonder if I'm missing something

Morning everyone. Up with the lark again here so just putting the kettle on for any bleary-eyed travellers in need of a cuppa...

I don't know what's up with baby Chulita - she was awake screaming every 2 hours last night and then woke up at 5 [sigh] 4 hours late, that cuppa'll be cold...

Hello chulita - could it be wind? My dd (7m) was quite windy when tiny but it settled and I thought that was all done and dusted but occasionally, she will have a really bad night shrieking her head off and can only be settled in an upright position (how handy for me at 2am). She then burps - sometimes really softly and i think 'what was all that fuss for?' I wondered if the intro of solids had got her tummy working overtime again. Hope things are better for you tonight

pookamoo - I now fall asleep in the car whenever a passenger - just like my Gran used to

Hello aliitlebitrestless and twinklyfairy! artifarti - can you put my tea in the microwave please and I'll have it before I go to bed!

Yea marmoset, I was wondering if solids were mucking her up - she was a windy LO too. 2 nights in a row now, argh! The only thing is that if we go in her room and she sees us she's all smiles and as soon as we leave she starts screaming...not crying, full on rigid body, red face, instant tears screaming. Is 6 months too young to be 'trying it on' as my mum puts it?

Thanks marmoset for the welcome.
Oh poor you chulita I remember my DS being lik ethat when he was a NB, lasted 6 weeks until they discovered and dealt with double hernias
Isn't it awful when it is something so tiny that is upsetting them nw though, teeny tiny burps keeps them up all night.
I am so sure that my DS is gonna be a nightmare with his teeth.
7mo and still no signs but he sure does gum his fingers!

I have tried to start another thread on moving DS to his own room but have had no success at all. I never do when I try to start threads what do I do wrong??

Anyone here got 2 LOs who had to share a room. How do you do it!
I just can't figure out the logistics at all! Who goes down first?!

I just spent ages composing my message (look earlier this eve for my issues if you want) but arthymum said it all! Hoping I might get a response or two...maybe. I should be in bed but with the no naps, late to bed early to rise my eating/chores/me time all happens into the later hours. I need my me time. I can't go to bed just after dinner as then I lose me and me and DH would never see eachother. So I have a glass of wine or two (yes still BF too) and watch recorded episodes of the Gilmore Girls and go on mumsnet. And pray.

oh! I Love the Gilmore Girls too!!!
That is my afternoon treat, well some afternoons.
DD says that it is my programme and indulges me
(she 2.8)

DC3 8 months old breastfed. Sometimes co-sleeps as I tend to fall asleep when feeding middle of the night. Has gone all night on a few occasions but they were just flukes. Wakes at least once a night, will not be put down awake for any naps unless in car and is tired after swimming.
Oler dcs were sleeping at this age. HELP

twinkling - I did it years ago (my eldest are now 12 and 10) and from memory (or what's left of it), I put baby down first and let him settle before the toddler went in. Pretty soon, i was putting them down at the same time. I know what you mean about new threads - some are slow burners!

Debs75 - my dd of 7m seems keen on dropping naps - its maybe a curiosity thing (not wanting to miss anything) but it does seem to be giving me slightly longer night time sleeps. My others weren't like that but maybe its a summer thing - too light and bright to nap?

ilovespagbol - hello

Hello all. Can I join too...?!

Go along totally with ilovespagbol. Spent half a very wakeful night composing a help thread and then here you all are ... its not just us ....thank you.
Totally awesome to find so many co-sleeping mammas and babbas and relieved (sorry!) to find that co-sleepers still have probs and its not the total fix-all that some of the books would have it.

Sorry though that there is not alot of sleep going on in other households too.

Debs75 - guess you've probably tried lying together and breastfeeding during the day to try to get lo to drop off. It was the only way I could get DS to nap for ages. Now he seems to have sussed that aand I have to carry him about in a sling nonchalently doing jobs and hummin Twinkle Twinkle Little Star (our sleep song) until he either goes really quiet (then the feeding thing works again) or actually drops off.

Can't offer much wisdom for night time sufferes though. DS is 10m and wakes virtually every hour. Used to be able to breastfeed him back off but now has wierd habit of sitting straight up, crawling or climbing on top of me, waking himself up totally whilst making 'I want to sleep' half cry whingey noises. Aaaah! Any advice truly welcome.

Debs75 - ooops, just re-read your message and see you are trying to get DC down awake. Can't help on that score - mine hollers the minute he goes down unless v v v sleepy. Perhaps carrying in a sling might work to get DC v relaxed and then just might go down

This hot weather isn't helping. I thought it was difficult having a winter baby, all that wrapping up warm and then upwrapping when inside. With hot waether, when they cry in the night they might be too hot or thirsty so have to offer the breast so she gets a drink! DD woke up about 1am hollering and it seemed to be what she wanted. Swore to DP she was going back in her cot as it just felt too hot to co-sleep then we both fell asleep and she ended helping hersef all night and taking up most of the bed! Wish we had a King Size. A litte bit knackered today as a consequence.

Hello all (and hi Chulita, my 4-5 month thread friend). Can I join 12 hours early? DS will be six months old tomorrow.

Up until this week he has been a shockingly bad night sleeper, has never slept longer than 4 hours in one go - normal is 2 hourly wakings - despite trying a hammock and also co-sleeping through the 4-5 month crapness. I have to say he is a fab day sleeper though; I have to wake him up from his naps otherwise we would never do anything.

However this week he's done a few 4 hour stretches at night and last night he did 6 hours in one go. I'm sure this is just a fluke so please can I book a slot for a good whinge tomorrow?

I would be really interested to read any stories on sleep training, how old DC, what people did, how it went, if it worked.... does it still work. We have not tried it yet....something is holding us back from doing it. Probably fear that it might not woek...and then what. [hmmm]

Yeah, me too. I'm a teacher and I could really do with DS being reasonable at night (pref down to one waking just for hunger or thirst) by September. We're BLWing so I guess it'll just depend on how much he's eating during the day as to whether he's hungry at night still.

What I really want to hear are stories about how CC doesn't work so that I can tell my unsympathetic mother that it's not the cure-all that she thinks

He's a very early riser too (4.30 this morning, gah!) so I think we might have to do the wake to sleep thing. I'm setting aside the whole of August (when he'll be 8 months) to devote to his sleep!

That said, he is getting a lot better. Last night he went from 7.30 - 11.30 when he woke just needing a cuddle then grizzled and finally settled himself. He then slept until 4.30 and dozed on and off until 5.30 when he was properly hungry.

Solids are having a big effect but I'm still expecting the worst every night so that then I can't be disappointed...

Hello all - ilovespagbol - I can't claim to have a remedy but my dd of 7m was up every two hours until a month ago when i cracked and decided to break the habit. I picked a time slot during which i wouldn't feed her anymore - 12midnight-6am and stuck to it for a few nights which has broken that cycle. I posted about it a while back on here but it wasn't too bad (or as bad as I had feared anyway!).

She is still up but usually only once and I am feeding her then (usually 3am) in the hope that this doesn't restart the bad habits. I didn't do cc (not yet, anyway) - just held her and comforted her during those few nights while she got out of the habit of feeding. Now I'm getting a few hours of sleep instead of none and it really helps.
Next stop is to get her to sleep through altogether but I'll take what I can just now

feralgirl - hope your ds better nights become the norm.

Hello all I was a regular on this thread for a while but have been absent as DS, now 9mo, has improved quite a lot. He now often settles himself when he wakes in the night and to my complete surprise has learned how to take long sleeps in the day. Yesterday he did two hours in his cot .

No doubt I am setting myself up for a colossal fall as today is his first day at nursery () and he'll probably be all over the place from now on, but I just wanted to say hang in there!

I used to be able to get her to nap in her pram after a walk, somedays she would have a little cry but would go over. The last couple of weeks however when we get back from a walk if I don't get her straight away she screams madly.

Have got the No Cry Sleep book and am going to try that. I can't do CC as our ds is autistic and when he hears her cry he gets really upset and screams for about an hour, even after she has gone back to sleep. Will let you know how that goes.

Have tried taking a nap upstairs during the day and we have some success, I feed for about 30 mins then she sleeps for another 30 mins maybe.

Today we managed to have a feed at dinner and after she dropped off I put her in her pram and she slept for about 40 mins. She is in bed now after a 25 min feed, will probably wake in about 30 mins then will go till about 11 when she will have another small feed then sleep till 6ish.

That may sound like a good night but I am still shattered, I don't mind the waking at 11 it's the struggle at 9 I find wears me out.

[Waves at Cyteen] Glad that the naps have improved - two hours, who'd've thought it! Our big news today is that finally The Teeth are poking through (well The Tooth, to be precise). Please let this be an end to the 4.30 alarm call...

Maybe what this thread needs is a guest speaker each week, someone that used to post on here but is now getting lots of sleep! I did speak to a former resident of this thread last week whose baby now sleeps 7-7 so there is hope out there, honestly.

Welcome to all newcomers. Hope last night was not too bad for you all. These humid sweaty nights are grim.

Hi!

Well, I thought that this thread had a magical effect (and it has in a way ). Since posting at the beginning of the week, we have gone down from 3+ night wakenings to just one (harldly dare talk about it for fear of it changing). However for the last couple of nights we have had extremely reluctant bedtimes ('thanks mum and dad but I'll stay up well past ten if that's ok with you'). Yesterday I thought we had got over that little hurdle, went to bed reasonably early (8.30 ish) but instead of sleeping till 7ish, was up and raring to go at first light. Hmmm...

Hope last night was ok for everyone else.

Agh, had 'one of those days'.

Crap sleep last night - DS woke at 11.30, didn't settle til gone 12 then woke every hour after that. Rubbish naps all day with constant grizzling and not much eating of solids as a result. He also refused to take a bottle (I'm going back to work at the end of this month so it's becoming a pressing issue!) so I wasted about 4oz of EBM.

I'm assuming it's down to teeth, which started to come through last week but granules aren't making any difference; guess we'll just have to dose him up with calpol.

AND my bloody breadmaker's packed up

On the positive side, DH took one look at me when he got home and said that he'd take him tonight which was nice of him. Unfortunately DH is rubbish at night so we'll see how long it lasts I've also just insulted the MiL so he may well retract his offer...

Hi feralgirl!!
Baby Chulita has not settled since joining this thread...must be a 6 month thing cos she's back to feeding 3/4 times a night after knocking it back to 1 or 2. I'm wondering whether to try offering her water for the 11:30 feed cos she doesn't seem to take much. I'm just worn out at the mo cos DH is away again. Shouldn't complain though cos he's back Sat for a while hopefully
Lol to insulting MIL, hope your DH copes with tonight feral [fingers crossed]
Argh! DD's awake again, 3rd time since bedtime, she's really kicking the arse out of it tonight!!

DD was up at 5 this morning, screaming, after a really bad night and I changed her nappy to find the most horrendous nappy rash she's had in ages - proper wet, raw rash so no wonder she was screaming. Thing is since 5 she's just whinged and whinged...ok it must freaking hurt but we're off on a train trip in an hour and not getting there til 3pm, she's not slept for nearly 4 hours and she's not happy being put in bed. I'm am absolutely fed up of her non-stop whingeing and I know I'm going to have it most of the train trip down... [fed up and knackered]. Pity party over, I'll go and pack with DD sat in her sling whingeing...