Pick Up/Put Down Experts please HELP!!

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Have a 5 month DS that has never settled himself to sleep since birth. Have always rocked, fed or been in pram. After 5 months of very little sleep I am trying PU/PD.

Problem is there is no awake but calm to put him down. He is either awake and crying or asleep and calm? Do I wake him up (really don't want to!!!!) or is it fine that he is asleep. Average waking are 4/5 times a night from 11pm and often up for 1 or 2 hours. Everytime his back hits the cot mattress he screams and flails.

Any ideas would be much appreciated.

Nothing useful to say on PU PD as we found it the same too. All I can say is that DD (now 3) fed etc to sleep(no I wasn't pleased about it, but there you go) but now settles without so it will stop eventually. Others might be able to help on quicker solutions but I'm a soft touch with a low crying tolerance threshold!

Thanks for your reply. Have increased formula (mix fed), purchased a baby monitor in order to keep DS door closed at night. Perservering with the PUPD in the hope there might be a breakthrough. Will get it sorted before I have to return to work. (Crossing fingers and praying to the baby god )

i think this is a very over stimulating method of trying to get a baby to sleep

how many night feeds does he have?

Just out of interest when are you going back to work? I went back briefly at eight months and I think she was sleeping through by then because I remember a night feed starting again so it must have stopped - but that was literally for first few days and then stopped again so don't let that panic you! It must have been around solids time that the waking stopped thinking about it. But who knows why they stop waking - sometimes I think it's due to what you do and sometimes despite it. My second sleeps better and it's down to thumb sucking I think - certainly nothing we've done!

It took us 3 days to do it with dd- she got it though. It would always take longer when teething. ill etc.

Feeds like a demon at night. Not sure how to stop it. When the sleeping goes wrong he ends up co sleeping and feeding alot. On a good night he has a bottle at 6pm, then boob at 9pm, 12pm, 3pm, 4.30pm and 6pm.

Should be going back to work in June. Seems a while away but I can just see it creeping up on me and can't be up for hours every night trying to settle him. New trick last night was to go back in his cot after every feed but wake every 5 minutes and need to be settled again.

Sorry for late reply.

I agree with ruby I found PUPD didn't work with my DS as he just got overtired/overstimulated and couldn't sleep when I was constantly picking him up. What worked for us was a version of shh-pat. Once DS was in the cot I wouldn't pick him up (as long as I knew he was well fed, clean and not too hot/cold) but I would sit by his cot if he cried saying "shh" and patting either his back or putting my hand on his chest. Sometimes this took up to 30 mins, and it was painful and hard but I refused to "give in" (not to him but to my pain) as consistency is the key - and I was CERTAIN he actually wanted, and needed, sleep. IMO its a less stimulating way than PUPD but still helps them to go to sleep in their cot rather than putting him down asleep. I have found that when I want to do something like this I have to work up the courage to know it may take a few days and be painful but unless you do this you could end up "giving in" too soon and then your DS may get confused and you'd have to start again IYSWIM.

My DS now goes down wide awake with a light show on and puts himself to sleep.

HTH - good luck!

He is only 5 months- the feeding doesn't seem too excessive, but foegive me- it's 2.5 years since dd was that age, so I may be misremembering.
Can you up feeds in the day/cluster feed in evening?

June is 3 mo away- and an 8mo is a very different kettle of fish to a 5mo, I promise.

Thanks for all your posts. May have to re examine. The thought of letting him cry scares the hell out of me, but may have to be what we resort to!