Sleep issues... Help please!

[luluhollybolly]

I am beginning to think that I am useless! Our daughter is now 6 months old and still does not sleep through... not even close!

She goes to bed at 7pm every night and wakes about 10.30 for a feed, when we go to bed. From this point onwards I am lucky if she goes two hours between feeds.

I pick her up, feed, then put her back to bed, which is usually fine until about 5-6am when she starts waking up properly and has to start practising her new ability to roll over and to screech her lungs out. Nothing I do at this time will get her back to sleep.

It is cripling me! Everyone else I know has a baby that sleeps through... what am I doing wrong???

I could cope with getting up at 6am if she let me sleep until that point.

Firstly - HUGE sympathy to you. DS has not ever managed to sleep through - his best was 7 hours, which he managed once at 8 months - but I won't tell you how old he is

Are you BFing? If so, get that baby into bed with you! She can go into her cot for the evening then come into bed with you when you've had enough getting up and down. We find DS actually sleeps for longer periods when he's in our bed. Safe cosleeping advice here.

You are doing nothing wrong. Everyone else is either really lucky or lying. Babies don't all sleep through. Those that wake up are the clever ones who want to check their parents are close by, and are the ones who would survive in 'the wild'

If I were you (and I was, once ) I would find a way to sleep with her and make a serious point of getting myself into bed early so you can cope with the early wakeups. I know it's hard just now with Big Brother and stuff but it will soon be finished

They do get better at sleeping as they get older, you just have to do what it takes to ride it out.

For what it's worth, I don't believe everyone else's baby sleeps through, whatever they say. Sleeping through seems to be a benchmark for good parenting for many people - I reckon they all lie...

Mine slept through for the first time at 11 months and 14 months (last week) respectively. Hideous while it lasted.

Big sympathy from me. I know how horrible it is. But don't feel like a failure. It's nothing you've done. She will, eventually, get the idea.

My son has never slept through either (and he is nearly 15 months!!!) I did go through a phase of reading loads of books and trying different things (though I couldn't bring myself to do controlled crying) but once I stopped getting stressed about it and decided to go with the flow and to co-sleep it was so much better.

I can see his sleep habits are gradually getting better with age - he can get himself back off to sleep and fall asleep without me, and one day it will click. I'm not worried about it now, which is the main thing that has helped me get through these months!

I know its hard though, its very lonely being up with your baby in the small hours. I doubt very much if all your friends babies are sleeping through though. And even if they are now, it may not last!!

She is still in our bedroom, next to our bed in her travel cot so she has not left my side yet.

Do you think it might help putting her into her own room?

Last night the 'good morning, I'm awake' screeching started at 4.15am.... I think I may go insane!

I'm of the other opinion in that i think they should sleep in their rooms. I transferred both ds and dd into their own rooms at 6 weeks. They slept in the moses basket which was inside the cot. I think when you are all in the same room you all disturb each other too often.

It is possible to achieve good sleeping through but it does take a lot of hard work and consistancy..
Both mine slept through from 3 months and i would never feel the need to lie about it. Why would people lie about getting a good nights sleep when really they don't?? Don't get that at all.

The way i did it was establishing a bedtime routine which i did at the same time in the same order every night. It lasts only 30is mins from bath to bed. I would lay baby down awake so that they become secure at falling asleep on their own. If they cried and i knew it was only due to tiredness i did the pat/shh method every 5-10 mins until they fell asleep. Every feed until 7am was treated like a night feed in that i did it in the dim light with cuddles but little talking.

I did the pat/shh after every feed if they didn't go right off.

I worked very hard to achieve my good sleepers and had nights of sheer hell to get there.

My friend had a tough time with her ds and she got referred to a fantastic sleep clinic who helped her no end.

Have you read "the secrets of the baby whispherer" by Tracey Hogg? It was her methods i used straight off... The message boards on the website have loads of tips for sorting sleep issues out.

Thanks, I have the book and have just started reading it so will let you know how I get on.

I think I will move her into her own room and see what happens.

We do have a really good bedtime routine which she has always responded well too.... it just the rest of the night....

If you get on the baby whisperer website and go on the message boards you could either post your question or look for one similar.... there are loads. The mums who answer are all mega tracey hogg followers and could help you make a specific plan to help you sort this.

Good luck and hope things sort themselves out for you..