Tips for settling a newborn in a Next2Me

[Daisysimply]

Hi any advice is appreciated. My second little one is nearly 2 weeks old. Have been struggling from the start to get her settled in the next2me crib. Also refusing to be laid down during the day for naps however not finding this as much of a struggle with baby wearing etc. I’m however very worried about Co sleeping. Did this with my first from a couple months old after 2 months of not sleeping as she’d only settle sleeping on my chest. The issue is my 3.5 year old still co sleeps to this day. Starts off the night in her bed then a few hours later ends up in with me. I know this is not safe to have both the kids in bed with me which is why I’m looking for tips on how to settle baby in the next2me crib. Anything that anyone has found to work?

Do you have a partner? If so, can they cosleep with your older child? I'm going to be honest and say I don't know why you're expecting a newborn to sleep independently when your older child doesn't.

I don’t know what people expect newborns to sleep independently when adults generally don’t.

To share sleep safely either have the older child sleep with the other adult (assuming you have a partner) and/or don’t have the newborn in the middle of the bed.

I used to hold my DD up against the side of the cot (the side nearest the bed) and cuddle her tight against it with one arm so it was like she was in both my arms. Id hold her there for a little while, while patting her bottom and shushing. It did really help, however, I do realise I may have just had a unicorn baby - I'm pregnant with DC2 so hoping it works again!

swaddling and putting a rockit on the next to me and a dummy

Do sleep shifts with your partner. My baby was held sleeping for the first 10.5 weeks

My DS is now 4 years old and I've never co-slept with him so hopefully this helps. I did contact nap with him a lot though where I'd hold him while he'd sleep but only for daytime naps.

I found the next to me too big to start with so my DS slept in a moses basket placed inside the next to me to start with, i did try the next to me but I found he'd end up down at the bottom with his blanket which worried me. I used to breastfeed him to sleep in the bed with dim light and white noise, wind him and hold for 15-20 mins until he was in a deep sleep, then transfer into the moses basket, placed him down bum first to prevent startling him, leave my hand on his chest for a minute so he felt I was still with him, then pull up his blanket and hope for the best.

Do they seem to like swaddling? My daughter loved the Happiest Baby 5 second swaddle (arms down) and my son loved the Love to Dream swaddle (arms up). I always had to wait til they were in a deep sleep to transfer into the cot, but with the swaddles we then usually got a chunk of sleep.

The Love To Dream swaddle suits seemed to work well for my little ones! My daughter also really liked the Ewan the Sheep thing that plays a calming noise when it detects them rousing (she liked the heartbeat noise).

I’m not going to lie, they didn’t love it for the first few weeks, but they got used to it. I know there will be people who think it’s cruel to sleep them separately but I genuinely did not think co sleeping would be safe for us as I am a sleepwalker and my DH is a very heavy sleeper.

I had a next to me but swapped it at the start for a moses basket as she didn't settle in the next to me but did in the MB.
I made sure I got a chunk of sleep before DH came to bed, he had baby downstairs and then I would just feed and resettle in the MB. Some nights I got more sleep then others but we soon got to the point where she'd sleep for at least 4 hours straight overnight. That felt like lots of sleep back then!
When she moved into the next to me, I would keep my hand on/ next to her and I think that helped her settle.

Can you make sure the cot is cosy, warm it with a hot water bottle before putting baby in (then remove obviously, before anyone clutches their pearls), swaddle or baby sleeping bag works wonders. The sheep that has womb noises/heart noises is brilliant next to cot too. Other than that, it is just a question of persevering I’m afraid.