How do you know when to drop a nap?

[oysterpots]

DS is 11mo and has had 2 naps a day for the last few months (naps at 9am and 1pm).

For the past week or so he's been a devil to get down for a nap, and I'm beginning to think it's because he no longer needs the morning nap.

This morning he was yawning, fussing and asked to be picked up - all signs he used to want a nap - but I put him down at 9am. Have just got him up again as he won't go down. Nothing seems to work, and I think he's worked out that if he chucks the dummy out of the cot I'll go back in! He used to grumble a bit, roll over and send himself off to sleep, but has turned into a nightmare.

Anyway, is he just transitioning from two naps to one? Is this how you know?

DD did this and she was just having a developmental spurt. I don't have time to explain now as DH is about to get the freedom of the city but will come back later Hang in there.

Fact is you don't know! It's more trial and error, I think.

DD (23 months) was on an hour and a half nap after lunch, but now seems to be going through a growth spurt and is back on morning naps!

But you may want to try putting him down later for his morning nap and see if this makes a difference?

My friends children all have different nap times, so it seems to be an individual thing.

my ds had 9am naps and then started going for a nap at 9.30am as he got a bit older. By the time he was 11 months he was going for a nap around 11.30am (had to either give him a biggish mid-morning snack or give him his lunch early) and now he is 20 months he has lunch at 12pm and nap at 12.30pm for a couple of hours. If he isnt going to sleep at 9am then leave him a bit longer before putting him to bed.

OK, so I'm back from a very proud day if a bit random! Anyway... Just like babies have growth spurts, they regularly have developmental spurts. Have you noticed how they always do loads of new things at the same time and then don't do much new for a while? This is because of developmental spurts. Before they make this developmental leap, they go through a fussy period because they are confused by the world and are trying to work it out again with a new perception of the world. These development spurts are at fairly predictable ages and your little one is about the right age to be starting to go through a fussy phase now before making a developmental leap. During fussy phases, some babies resist sleep even though they clearly need it amongst other behavioural challenges. If you want to know more then it is all explained in the book 'the wonder weeks' although you will need to get it off of ebayor somewhere similar as it is currently out of print. People pay up to £200 for a copy but I can see why. The book is based on 'Perceptual Control Theory' and you may find something useful if you google this. I can give you more details about this leap if you want.

Of course, your son may just be ready to drop to one nap.

Sorry, I take that back. There is a new edition now in print and available on amazon

My almost 12 mo old dd is same. Went through a couple of weeks when seemed to drop morning nap so i tried to steer towards longer one in middle of day. But now she's back needing it more badly than ever, but usually more like 3 hours after waking for day whereas always used to be 2.

Sounds like your DS could be ready to drop the morning nap. You could maybe try dropping it, giving him a very early lunch and then putting him down for his afternoon nap earlier than 1pm.

with DS1, I used to give him a really big snack around 11:30 or so and then put him down for a long nap. When he woke a couple of hours later, I'd give him lunch.

At first you might find it hard to 'jolly him along' but within a few days, he will probably get used to just the afternoon nap.

Good luck!

By 11 months I am fairly certain my dd and then my ds were having one 2 hour nap in the day, but they weren't ready for it until 11/11.30 ish and that gradually got later and later until it could be a post-lunch nap that lasted until about 3pm. My darling DD kept that up until she was 3 years old, DS decided to stop napping completely just after his 2nd birthday. That was a shock to the system, tbh.

Starlight, Some kids fall into a routine and get cranky/unsettled, so yes, 'some people' really do live like this! Plus, some don't have luxury of 'whenever'

How great that you can gauge it though!

Keep him up tomorrow morning and see what happens.

DD was a bit on/off with her morning nap around this age. Then she started nursery and morning naps were definitely off. The plus side to this was that she started sleeping in - sometimes waking as late as 9am!

Swaliswan - interesting what you say about developmental spurts. I think my DD is going through one now. After seemingly able to survive without as much sleep, DD is currently desperate for napping and likes her bed well before her usual 7pm. This has coincided with her new ability to stand herself up unaided and her desire to walk.

HTH FeelingEvil. Buy the book! It will be the best £12.83 you've ever spent!

FE - snap! dd just walking and super knackered for two day time naps and early bed.

DS is 13 months and still has a morning nap, although it has gone back gradually in time from around 8.30 at 6mths to now about 10am. We did try "dropping" the morning nap but he was so cranky by 11.30 that he couldn't eat lunch!

He also has a short nap at about 14.30 if he is still tired but sometimes doesn't feel like it.

oh, thanks everyone, that's reassuring stuff. I will DEFINITELY get that book Swaliswan, congratulations for your DH btw.

Saturday morning we didn't let him have his morning nap, and he seemed ok. Went down for his post-lunch nap a bit early, but only slept for an hour and a half and was AWFUL all afternoon. So Sunday he had the morning nap (I cuddled him to sleep, argh) plus another hour and a half in the afternoon, and was a bit better.

But then he woke in the early hours of this morning, once in floods of tears - think he'd had a bad dream - and once again around 4.15 not crying, just babbling the way he does when he wakes for the morning. I lay frozen to the spot, in a cold sweat, so worried that this would be the norm from now on. After half an hour or so he started crying, so I went in and cuddled him back to sleep, after which he slept until 6.30am. When he got up this morning he had a dreadful cold, so I wonder whether some of this new bad napping might have something to do with him feeling rotten.

Anyway, he went off for his morning nap as soon as I put him down - no cuddling required - but have had to cuddle him down for his post-lunch one today.

I haven't even mentioned the fact that I have been creeping in after he's been asleep for 40 minutes, just to shush him back if he wakes then, as per the No Cry Sleep Solution book.

Gawd, feel the anxiety rising again - gonna have to go and creep in soon. Am I making life too hard for myself?

Ooohh, I'm tempted to buy the book, but for two reasons:

1. My DD is 12 months, so will only get 6 more months worth of info from it. Feeling stingy today, rather than evil
2. Have kind of made a promise to myself not to buy any more books on childcare but to try and use instincts (and words of wisdom from MNetters too, of course!)

Don't know ... might go for a coffee in Borders and have a browse through it.

oysterpots, my DD gave up her second nap at 11 months (only in her case she gave up the second one). She did it the same way - she suddenly became very difficult to put down for the second one.

I fed her to sleep at naptime, and yet she wasn't falling asleep. That should have been a pretty clear sign, but for a few days I was in YOU WILL NAP! mode because the change was so sudden.

just realised the above doesn't make sense - I meant she gave up nap no. 2, only in her case it was the second one of the day (I didn't refer to am and pm because she's always been all over the place in terms of when she needs them).

and wow, someone finally realised that reprinting The Wonder Weeks was a good commercial proposition. I have a dogeared sheaf of photocopies that some HV made for my sister and she passed on to me...

btw the opening para. of each chapter (plus the little sun and storm clouds chart) is on the web at www.livingcontrolsystems.com/wonder_weeks/content_ww.html.