If both parents work, how are you managing to get your babies to bed for 7pm?

[fanclubb]

DS is ten months old and will start his night time sleep at around 8:30-9pm. I feel like this is very out of step with what I see on here and what I hear in local mums’ groups, where babies are put down for 7pm.

But, I just don’t see how this is feasible! Once I’m back at work, DH and I will both be home for around 5:30-5:45. We’ll barely have a chance to come in, make and eat dinner, give DS dinner before it’s 7pm! What about spending time with DS, a bit of play and reading time, baths etc. I don’t see how people do it?!

Is 7pm just for if you have a SAHP who can facilitate an earlier bedtime?

Are they actually putting the baby to bed at 7 or starting the bedtime routine (bath, reading, bed) at 7?

there’s a big difference.

I didn’t do a ‘family dinner’ midweek when mine were that age. They got tea at nursery so had a quick snack then bath and bed about 7-7.30. Then DH and I would eat later.

7pm is arbitrary. If your bedtime works for you then why change it?

I'd only be worried if your DS wasn't getting enough sleep

I’m home for 5-5.30, ds 3 has usually been fed already otherwise quick tea. Dh home for 6. Bedtime starts at 6.30 and he’s asleep for 7.

We collected from nursery between 5.45 and 6. Half an hour walk home. Aimed to have them in their cots/beds by 8.30.

What time do you need to get him up in the mornings when you are both back at work? How much nighttime sleep does he need? Work back from that.

We do nursery pick up about 5.45, second dinner then bed and bath and we eat after. My little boy is in bed between 7-7.30.

My daughter had dinner at nursery and I collected her at 5.30/6.00 then it was literally bath cuddle milk bed. Absolutely no chance of anything else mid week. It’s sad but true and I wouldn't bother trying to make play time - they’ve had that at nursery

We both worked 8-4. Made the mornings a bit frantic, especially since nursery didn't open til 7.30, but I was generally home, with the kids, by 4.40.

appreciate babies don't "need" to go to bed at 7pm, ie 9pm-8am/9am is fine, but what time are they waking up? If they need to be up earlier than 8am I would absolutely aim for a 7pm ish bedtime.

You can eat once she's in bed. Where is the baby during the day? Can they not eat there? Otherwise being at home at 5:30 for 7pm bedtime is pretty standard, not just for SAHM!

Mine had a snacky tea at nursery, then home around six-ish for some more food but it was something quick, they wouldn't tolerate hanging around whilst we cooked a meal as they're tired from nursery. Then up for a bath around 6:45 and story in bed. So asleep by 7:30 latest, as they need 12 hours sleep.

Don't work to 7pm if it doesn't work for you. It more about the amount of hours your DS needs than what time they go to bed

We did 7.30pm but I collected at about 5pm as I finished at 4pm. Dinner would be ready 5.30pm/6pm depending on what we were having. Bath time starts at 6.45pm. In bed 7.15pm - usually asleep for 7.30pm.
We got up at 6am thought as had to leave at 7.15am. DS got 10ish hours on a good night sleep (not that he ever slept well).

I have friends who put to bed later a 9pm as that worked for them work wise. And they got up later than we did in the mornnings.

Our two (age 1 and 4) need to be in bed ready to sleep by 7:30 and we all get in about the same time as you OP. What we do is cook dinner very quickly (either by having batch cooked in advance, or by eating things that only take 15-20 minutes to cook). We all eat together, then we do bath, story and bedtime starting from around 6:30-645. We can normally manage to get them down by 7:30, then we finish tidying up, walk the dog etc. Admittedly there's not time for much playing, but they are tired anyway so not really up for it - whichever one has their bath second can do some playing while one parent starts the washing up. And as for spending time together, we're all eating together so that's family time. Then bath and stories are also quality time. And we get some child-free downtime in the evenings too, which is also important.

Pick up at 5:30 - 5:45, home, someone cooks a quick tea while the other plays with the children, eat 6 - 6:20ish, into pyjamas, quiet time activity until 7pm, upstairs for stories, asleep by 7:30.

Person not doing bedtime does tidy up/washing up from the day.

We never did a prolonged bedtime routine with a bath and a massage and all that though.

Same. At that age they are better into bed and you can eat after.

I used to have easy meals that we could reheat (some days for all of us, sometimes just for DC) and DH and I would eat after the DC were in bed. So I’d cook the night before / use the slow cooker etc.

We’d come home and eat almost straight away. DC would then have a short playtime with one parent whilst the other tidied the kitchen. Bath time was 6:30, followed by milk and stories and bed by 7.

Some children need less sleep than others. Mine have never been in bed for 7pm. More like 8.30-9pm and up for 7.30am. If they were in bed by 7, they'd be up at 5-6am.

When mine were younger me and DH would get in for about 5pm and we would just spend the evening with our son. We’d feed our son but we wouldn’t worry about feeding ourselves at that point.

One of us would then take him up for story and bedtime at about 7pm and he’d be in his cot for 7.30pm. We didn’t bath him every night and instead would give him a body wipe down with a flannel to save time.

Whichever parent wasn’t doing storytime/bedtime would be downstairs cooking dinner for us.

That way we’d have a nice peaceful evening together whilst knowing we’d also had a quality 2-2.5 hours with our son before putting him to bed.

It wasn’t ideal as I still felt like I hardly saw him, but needs must.

We get home at 4:30, dinner 5-5:30, play time until 6:30 then bath if they need a bath, and in to bed for 7, bit of reading and lights out at 7:30

Pretty much impossible. I was a working single parent to one. We got home around 615-630. It had to be 830 or do. Also, you want time with them

Mine never went to bed at that time, or dinner at 4.30 pm or whatever so many other people seem to do. I never got home from work until after 6 so just not feasible given we still had to have dinner.

Just adding to the people saying bedtime doesn’t have to be 7pm, my little one is naturally later to bed than this. If little one is getting his required amount of sleep then work to that. Obviously if nursery means an earlier wake up time than before then bedtime may naturally come earlier

We get in at 5.30/5.45 - baby & Toddler have had tea at nursery at 4.30 - so they play for half hour or so - just have toast or some porridge or something small for a sort of Supper

I've swapped to giving the kids a shower in the mornings before nursery rather than at night and it saves loads of time (they have baths a few times in the week as its fun and they like it) Sometimes the baby is a bit gross so i'll give him a rinse in the shower before bed-

we all read books then baby is in bed asleep by half 7.15/7.30 and toddler by 8.

we just eat dinner after they are in bed - one of us sorts dinner while other is doing bed.

So ignore all you read and do what suits you.
We started bedtime routine at about 7. Bath, story, feed (if breastfeeding, obviously not if older) cuddle down to bed. A baby would be in their cot at 7.30, an older child closer to 8. Whoever is not doing the bedtime routine is making dinner.
Make the weekends real family time with activities (though that doesn’t mean every minute needs to be planned) and enjoy each other.

I’m a SAHP, dd goes to bed after 9pm and awake between 8/9am. We can only do this because she doesn’t need to be up and out the door early (groups don’t start until 9:30ish).

DH gets home from work around 6:00, he’ll play with DD whilst I dish up and then we all eat together.

Most of my friends I made on maternity leave went back to work and we’re the only family that all eat together. All their kids eat at nursery and they have their meal once the kids are in bed.